But I thought you did a good job of tying up the loose questions. You didn't just add them, but you made them make sense.
But something tells me you have at least one more story in you. You setup a cliffhanger with Doug and Brett's ex-wife. Your character Candi suggested that Bev should watch out for Doug's return. And she blew her off. That sounded like an interesting setup
But I personally can see the development with each story. The only thing I would say, please take it with a grain of salt, you really only have 2 stories here so far. But you've split them into 5 stories. But that is just a personal preference.
English
all good
but I think this should be the end. nothing erotic could come out of going on.
At first I didn't like it (^_^)
But I thought you did a good job of tying up the loose questions. You didn't just add them, but you made them make sense.
But something tells me you have at least one more story in you. You setup a cliffhanger with Doug and Brett's ex-wife. Your character Candi suggested that Bev should watch out for Doug's return. And she blew her off. That sounded like an interesting setup
But I personally can see the development with each story. The only thing I would say, please take it with a grain of salt, you really only have 2 stories here so far. But you've split them into 5 stories. But that is just a personal preference.
Better development. Thanks for posting =)
-Risq
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to A Piece of Candi Ch. 05 or
More submissions by SinsiousSiren.