All Comments  for

Lost in a Lonely World

bydangerouslydead©
All
Comments (95)
by Anonymous

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by Anonymous12/07/09

Sad tale, wrong category

It should be posted in NON-EROTIC category.
Sad, sad story...

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by Pistolpackinpete12/07/09

Read this on Sol..,..

....it is dark but unique,well done.

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by Anonymous12/07/09

it blows my mind,how writers forgive

wife shit and pissed on him and still he forgive.it just ant real.the whole family got problems.

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by louguy3512/07/09

Excellent story!!!

This is a realistic and instructive story about how those who should have shown loyalty can, instead, kill the heart of an innocent victim. As you say, "collateral damage." The story further shows how a person with a broken heart can find peace, of sorts, in his or her isolation.

In the end, even the expressions of sorrow and apology have the ring of insincerity because those who apologize do not regret their gain which resulted from their long ago actions. Their expressed sorrow is really a reflection of their own self-pity.

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by Anonymous12/07/09

Wow what a self destroying man.

Could you have painted any more as a wimp and submissive man? I agree he had no reason to keep the marriage but if he knew she was "dating" other men why did he come out the bad guy? Destroy her life, make her the guilty party in the divorce suit for adultry. And with her history he could have gone for custody of the kids with her beig an unfit mother. Nope the story doesnt wash. And making him a saint by saying he has a limited life expectancy is a good tear jerker but unrealistic. None of us have any way of knowing how long they will live. His exwife and her current husband could die on the way home in a car wreck. Try to get more realistic, you may forgive cheaters for being stupid and self centered, but you never ever forget.

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by Anonymous12/07/09

Not me

I cannot say that I would be so selfless. He got shit on by all of them. They completely destroyed his life and he had to live out the rest of his life in agony: I would take my pound of flesh for this and I do not mean stopping at the 60/40 divorse split. I would leave them NOTHING when I passed and especially after the ex-wifes admission of calling him a beater- EVERYONE she or I ever knew and anyone I can find that she knows now would know what she did and how she did it. The new husband's story as well. Fuck all of them. That being said about the characters and the author's choice of the main character's mind set; the writing is not bad. For as short as the story is the characters are well presented and there is not a lot of time spent on pointless back story. What is said is well stated and to the point of the story in a full, developed and concluded story.

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by bruce2212/07/09

Very dark and interesting

He reminds me of a boxer who has been hit too often. He does though remain focused on his need to maintain the bequeathing of his genes even though the bearers are guilty of terribly mistreating him. Many people in his situation would have gone berserk and others would have drank themselves to death.

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by Harddaysknight12/07/09

Questions arise.

Is the man being considerate to his estranged family, or is he depriving them of their opportunity to learn to love him again? This is good!

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by Anonymous12/07/09

crap

bunch of crap

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by Anonymous12/07/09

author is from INDIA

which use to be a Br Colony so it is NOT surprising that this author has No ability to write anything other than weak stupid pathetic men/ husbands.

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by GenghisKhan12/07/09

One of the reasons authors write

stories that they say drain them emotionally and the stories are as depressed, depressive, and fatalistic as this is that they enjoy self-inflicted pain above all else.

for, otherwise, a small, mere uplifting part on the author's part, say, having the wronged man --- though bitter as he will always be, even towards the very end --- saying that although he no longer wishes to rebuild a bridge with a family, wife and kids, and other family members who so heinously wronged him.... that he has gone ahead and created a family of his own, and he truly no longer considers the old family and extended families as part of himself....

that's all it takes.

or, at the very least, have the man say something about having donated all his wealth, created after they have destroyed him, to the CHARITIES of the world, for homeless children and abused wives, and elderly care,,, and that SUCH people and institutions DESERVE more of him, of his love, help, and contribution than the family he so loved, for all his life, a family which turned out to deserved NONE of his love, devotion, respect, or labor... and that although he knows he is dying, he is happy that he has made the world a better place, by his industrious years, even in great pains and sorrows for having so heinous betrayed by those he loved the most....

I mean, why not SOMETHINE LIKE THAT? Why, I hate you so much, but I am dying and I will hate you to until I draw my last breath; but I am so glad you are all here, one last time, to hear me tell you how hateful, hatefilled, depressed, and suicidal and homicidal I am because you destroyed me so many years ago and I can no longer function as a good, loving man toward any others, although I have hookers come in and out of this big house on a daily basis?

I mean, what the fuck is that?, AGAIN, especially if the AUTHOR claim to be so draining writing such a short, depressive, ugly, hatefilled story??? Again, answer: the author loves self-torture, self-mutilation, and other fetish.... since the story can be turned into a positive, bittersweet, but upliftingly positive life story of grain pains and ultimate triumph...

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by Drall12/07/09

A lovely story!

Very sad,but very well done. Thank you.

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by Anonymous12/07/09

Superb concept of estrangement!

This' the first time I've ever rated any story this high! 100 for sure.

I guess it's cause my wifey n kids did the same exact thing to me. Loyalty? Nada, no way. Their mother estranged them from me by brainwashing them to be afraid of me with me unknowingly attempting to keep whatever lil relationship that was left. It took a number of years before all 3 kids came partly around but their relationship is forever somewhat reticent and always kinda aloof despite my efforts. They see me a damaged goods due to their mother and I see them that way for the same reason, their mother.

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by Anonymous12/07/09

What a steamy load of crap!

Children don't choose one parent over the other based on how much money they make. Even teenagers aren't that shallow. Furthermore, the idea that everyone would disown him based on singular testimony and call him an asshole is ludicrous, especially considering how quickly she re-married. Why did the children refuse all gifts and contact with their father? Because he divorced his cheating wife who re-married anyway? And this bullshit about forgiving all of them, now get the fuck out of my life, is retarded. The author is indeed, dangerously dead. Now go away and stay dead.

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by Alberta Al12/07/09

I WAS ROGER

My mother screwed around on my father and the marriage ended when he caught her. He made the divorce messy enough that her trade-up boyfriend dumped her. At 9 yrs of age I was head of the household in a one parent family. My mother used us as a weapon against my father and eventually got pregnant by another man whom she married. The second husband ended up drinking himself to death. As an adult, I attempted to build a relationship with my father. Unfortunately, a combination of the pain my mother put him through as well as the jealousy of his second wife and her daughter( he worried about and missed my siblings and I ) contributed to him being unable to give anything to the relationship. Once he became senile in his 80s and his mind regressed to when I was a child he attempted to start a relationship. This only lasted a short time until he regressed to before my birth. For those lucky enough to not have experienced this first hand, there are women who will maintain a hatred for an ex-husband who wouldn't quietly walk away with their tail between their legs. For 30 years after their divorce, my mother hated my father and blamed him for ruining her life.

The story was well written and explained a lot of the emotional turmoil that the ex-husband went through. When I was in my 30s I eventually learned from my own father how he suffered.

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by Anonymous12/07/09

I do not care where in the world the author reside

a Great story... I suggest those of less rating opinion to look deeply into the writing and to the topic...

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by GenghisKhan12/07/09

This is a "good story"?

I WAS ROGER
12/07/09 by Alberta Al in Canada

My mother screwed around on my father and the marriage ended when he caught her. He made the divorce messy enough that her trade-up boyfriend dumped her. At 9 yrs of age I was head of the household in a one parent family. My mother used us as a weapon against my father and eventually got pregnant by another man whom she married. The second husband ended up drinking himself to death. As an adult, I attempted to build a relationship with my father.

Unfortunately, a combination of the pain my mother put him through as well as the jealousy of his second wife and her daughter( he worried about and missed my siblings and I ) contributed to him being unable to give anything to the relationship. Once he became senile in his 80s and his mind regressed to when I was a child he attempted to start a relationship. This only lasted a short time until he regressed to before my birth. For those lucky enough to not have experienced this first hand, there are women who will maintain a hatred for an ex-husband who wouldn't quietly walk away with their tail between their legs. For 30 years after their divorce, my mother hated my father and blamed him for ruining her life. The story was well written and explained a lot of the emotional turmoil that the ex-husband went through. When I was in my 30s I eventually learned from my own father how he suffered.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

A man --- whether it was your real dad or this fictional character --- going to his grave, saying to those who heinously wronged him: You made me so pissed off at you, at the world, I am going to my grave being pissed, at you, at the world, and I fuck nobody since you ruined my life but a hookers. I have brain tumor and I am dying, but I hope you know that and feel bad about what you put me through, you bad, evil people. I hope you suffer, putting me in this hell on earth, all these BITTER years... ???

Does THAT make them cry big tears for YOU?, people who shit in your meal and soup everyday, for years,,,, you gonna tell them you're dying of brain tumor, after years of being a bitter, bitter, ugly man,,, that somehow they are now crying big tears for you, as the AUTHOR here said here?

What complete gibberish nonsense.

Sociologists and psychologists know that people who live to be very old and in HEALTHY physical and mental state, are people who have a sunny side, and are always resilient, and don't dwell on ugliness and bitterness, whether self-created or heaved upon you by others.

For a man who is bitter for over a decade, dying of brain tumor from god knows what, and has nobody but hookers to fill his days, for him to broadcast his hatefilled, self-wallowing last moments to a family which casted him aside years ago... to say they will be sorry when he's dead! It's complete nonsense!

That's a "good story"? LOL

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by Anonymous12/07/09

Very Depressing

Didn't like it much.

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by Pistolpackinpete12/07/09

Have to respond to "Genghis"....

....Number one.YOU put your OWN spin on authors words.He wrote a very clinical diatribe.It is YOU who assign it overtones of sniveling self-pity.Number two.Shrinks do not live in the real world.And sunny dispositions are for self deluding morons.Number three.Attempting to debate another readers real life experience is the height of arrogance. Even I'm not that pompous or contentious.Number four.The protagonist's whole argument is that he is aware these selfish people are unable to feel real remorse, so he won't even give them the chance.This author,who anyone who reads sol knows-rocks.

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by Anonymous12/07/09

are you ppl really that stupid?

yes, teenagers do sometimes pick a parent who has more money and yes, he had every right to tell them to fuck off and leave him be. this was a sad, depressing story and i hope they fucking die, slowly. he has every right to be bitter and im sorry to say not everyone can move on, not everyone can forgive and forget.

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by Poizon6912/07/09

Hello Dangerouslydead.

I read your stories on SOL. Papatoad would be proud of your 'Flash' stories. As for this story? I thought it showed a lot of emotion. It was well written and you certainly made your point. Well done.

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by Anonymous12/07/09

Ghenghis Kohndom

is an idiot who can't separate fact from fiction. This is a story aimed at a certain readership. Obviously GK isn't a member of that audience. That being said, he should use his mouse and scroll along over to a stroke story that involves losers and goats.

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by lancewm12/07/09

Well done

Sad and dark, but well done!

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by woodmanone12/07/09

Very Dark

You're right, it is a story full of pain without a happy ending. But never the less it's a story full of remorse, bitterness, and finally concern for his children. In case everyone missed it, the man is close to death and he is trying to protect his children. Kids are kids and they will gravitate to where ever or who ever generates the most fun for them. I didn't like this story, too dark for my tastes but I feel it was well thought out and well written. There were a few technical errors but not enough to keep someone from enjoying the read. Keep up the good work.

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by Anonymous12/08/09

The Ultimate Revenge

Of all the revenge stories, this takes the cake. In rebuking his family he has sealed their future in the most tragic sense of fear....guilt. For the rest of their lives they will see tradegy as a result of their actions of the past. The son will not trust his wife, the daughter will remain unmarried. As for his ex-wife and lover, by their 15th year their past will have consumed their future, a future filled with unhappiness and mistrust. Forgiveness is the most powerful gift we have as humans. Not to forgive is the most powerful weapon. However, it is a two sided weapon. It slays not only the monster but the hero.

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by GenghisKhan12/08/09

The Little Canadian Einstein Anone

Ghenghis Kohndom
12/07/09 by Anonymous in canada
is an idiot who can't separate fact from fiction. This is a story aimed at a certain readership. Obviously GK isn't a member of that audience. That being said, he should use his mouse and scroll along over to a stroke story that involves losers and goats.

++++++++++++++++++++++

What a complete idiot are you? Even a complete retard like you KNOW this is LITEROTICA and it is complete gibberish fiction.

Idiots don't need to inform each other, in fictional cyberspace, that one or the other didn't know how to tell fiction from reality. Well, I guess true imbeciles like this Canadian retard here NEEDS to inform others THEY don't know what's "real" and what's "reality" in fictional writings.

The question, in any kind of writing, is: What is the purpose of the writing? Is it to inform, to instruct, to elucidate, to entertain.

My comments were VERY NARROW and SPECIFIC: they ask ONLY the AUTHOR. The author said specifically that this short story DRAINED him emotionally. My question is: Why write masochistic story that is downright ugly, depressive, depressing, negative, from beginning to the end, IF DOING SO get the WRITER himself downright depressed?, especially when such a story could be turned into an uplifting one with minimal work?

The Canadian retard thought the story mirrored his own retarded background --- slutting mom and a fukkin' retard as a father, "in real life" --- and it's highly elucidating, sociologically and psychologically. Okay, Einstein, if you say so!

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by GenghisKhan12/08/09

A Response for Pistolpackinpete in USA

Have to respond to "Genghis"....
12/07/09 by Pistolpackinpete in USA got a deer today!!!!

....Number one.YOU put your OWN spin on authors words.He wrote a very clinical diatribe.It is YOU who assign it overtones of sniveling self-pity.Number two.Shrinks do not live in the real world.And sunny dispositions are for self deluding morons.Number three.Attempting to debate another readers real life experience is the height of arrogance. Even I'm not that pompous or contentious.Number four.The protagonist's whole argument is that he is aware these selfish people are unable to feel real remorse, so he won't even give them the chance.This author,who anyone who reads sol knows-rocks.

+++++++++++++++++++

Why are you talking in gibberish?

I did not put my own spin on the author's words. This is the second time I read this story, and this is the second site I read this story. The author said, on the original site, that writing this story drained him emotionally, although it's a very short story.

My assessment had absolutely NOTHING to do with what you retards would call "skolarly" fiction; I was merely commenting on the AUTHOR's contradictory proclivity: why write such a downright ugly, depressing story if such an exercise makes you, the writer, downright emotinally drained?

"The protagonist's whole argument is that he is aware these selfish people are unable to feel real remorse, so he won't even give them the chance."

The problem with some people is that they think they are actually more intelligent or insightful than they really are. The "protagonist" in THIS story did NOT argue like that at all. The guy is a complete idiot, and he had NO coherent argument. Perhaps the AUTHOR intended the protagonist to be that way, I don't know. It's possible.

In any event, the protagonist's idiocy is clearly displayed when he demanded that his adult son and daughter go round up his own family, including the ex wife and her current husband, and meet him at his home and he'd tell them what he's been thinking of them all these years. And this was basically what he told them:

You screw my life over 10 years ago; I have since become a totally bitter man. I can't form any relationship, although I fuck hookers every weeks; I have them come here to my place, this big place, with me, a lonely, sick, old man whose every waking hour is a torture, because you --- those I loved so dearly -- stabbed me in the back.

I hope y'all know I am dying of brain cancer. Well, if you don't, it doesn't matter. But I hope you feel really guilty for having turned me into this bitter, old, sick man who has no family and who refused you, who're supposed to be his family! I will go to my grave angry, bitter, and pissed at you and everyone who has ever wronged me.

That was the "argument" the "protagonist" of this story said. Not what you, some retard, said he said...

Now, again, chances are, the AUHOR wanted it THAT WAY. I have no problem with the story itself, however ugly, dark, or downright depressing. I merely observe: Why write such a story if it gets YOU, the writer, downright emotionally drained and depressed?

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by Anonymous12/08/09

Great!!!!!!!!

This was a great story. One of the best in this loving wife section. More please!!!!!!

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Good story

There certainly ARE a lot of pundits around here, aren't there? First off, can we learn to enjoy a story without it playing out EXACTLY the way that WE'D have it play out if we wrote it? Secondly, why rate something so low when you don't like where the author takes it? Heck...writers like HDK and Ohio are GODS to me, but I often wish they'd have done something a little different.

I could definitely identify with this character as someone who has been in a similar situation, though significantly less sensationalized. As those who have ever read my humble efforts would agree, I think guilt is the most powerful revenge there is and THAT'S what I think the protagonist is doing here..... heaping it on.

Oh...one more thing....what's with giving a low rating and citing the protagonist being a wimp, but doing so anonymously? Really? Think REALLY HARD about that, then come see me.

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by SELSTIM12/08/09

A BITTER STORY....

about a self-aware lonely man that still cares about others enough to the point of putting their needs before his own. That being said, it was a prety good idea for a story. Albeit a sad one. However, there were quite a few grammatical errors, mostly sentence stucture and the improper use of some words that hindered the flow of the story. It was very interesting that these mistakes actually added to the authenticity of the jumbled thoughts of a severely depressed man. I found myself actually thinking like the main character as I stumbled through the words. (Please take no offense I do not judge people. For all I know you are Chinese and English is your second language) I really can't say the story was entertaining but it truly was an experience. I've heard of a type of writing that is purposefully jumbled in such a way to burrow past ones intellectual defenses to drive home the message effortlessly. By reading the comments it seemed to work. You can also tell which readers don't deal with sadness very well. These people tend to turn sadness into anger and lash out at others around them. Read the comments and you can actually feel the anger and spitefulness. I'm not sure if the halting flow was by design or not but you have written a truly powerful story. I hope you're not a member of congress. A story like this could start wars. Thank you for the experience

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by SELSTIM12/08/09

anothermarrieddude

Sorry, I couldn't resist. Guilt is learned. Some people react to guilt more than others. When it comes to Catholics I would agree with you that guilt is a powerful weapon but this does not hold true for everyone. However, I agree with eveything else you said about the comments and HDK & OHIO. I think "living well" is the best weapon. Guilt hurts but regret will kill you. So, if someone screws you over and takes your wife or your money, write a book based on it and become rich. The regret will kill them.

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by Anonymous12/08/09

Don't buy the behavior at all

I'm shocked by how many here think this story is realistic... wow, what shallow people you must be spending your life around. The husband gave up and walked away letting all the other people think he was an ass... there is NO WAY that all their adult friend would favor the cheater unless they already thought Dad was an ass... which is not what you chose to portray... the daughter was 17, if she loved her dad she wouldn't have walked, just not realistic that she is in tears years later. Son at 15 is borderline, maybe he was an idiot. The reunion, 'bring your mother and her husband' yeah right? he wouldn't be so motivated, and there isn't even a practical reason, the quotes in the story are just silly. None of this lines up with any normal human behavior.

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by morefunn02/01/10

Well Done.

Well written and executed. A sad and dramatic story of the damage done to a man who by all standards was innocent. Then deemed a wife beater. Well writtne and sometimes when you beat a man done, you break them. He was beaten and broken and found a way to live his life. So they wanted back, why? So he can get hurts again? Plus he doesn't want to hurt them. Let alone any of them to experience what was done to him. He was the better man and person.
Well written and story worth telling. Sad yes, but well done.
Thanks for sharing.

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by Anonymous02/13/10

reality

There was the impact cause by wendy, roger, susan and darin. Wendy said terrible things and will not acknowledge to the world what a horrid bitch she was? Those children shedded any residual caring for their father while wendy traded up? A different world was created, where it came with its own reality. As for his future and worldly goods? They are his and better to give them to charity, where more likely to do some good. The 4 left as they came, effectively strangers. And him, he's come to terms with his life, noting what it lacked.

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by Anonymous03/04/10

That which apparently most commenters missed is . . .

there is no way a husband can say anything that will convince anyone he is not or was not a 'wife beater' or abused her verbally or emotionally to 'please' anyone including any kids due to their mother brainwashing them. Ten years is a long time, long enough he adjusted well to his then new status and using whores to satisfy his libido is all right given his lack of 'love' given him by his family with no desire to get together with another fem.
Of note is the type/kind of comments so radically different tween the genders, that's always a truth in reading any of these stories and yes, 99% of all these stories are written by fems who have little to no knowledge of men in general or a particular man in specific.
Most fems would never do as this man did, they cannot be themselves and 'need' another in their life to 'feel complete' - whether with another fem or man.
The 'trading up' is actually the more prevalent justification for a fem to cheat in the first place, whether financially or his bigger cock or because he pays more attention to her than did her husband - in other words the 'other man' is more attractive in all ways the fem wants a man to treat her including kissing her ass and licking her dirty ass hole.

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by GrumpyGamby05/09/10

Misguided nobility

One cannot truthfully claim to have forgiven, if bitterness remains. The two are mutually exclusive. One cannot seek revenge if true forgiveness has taken place. The man is still wrapped up in his pain, his bitterness and as a result, unable to see the truth of his actions.

He was not, in fact wishing them well. He was laying himself down on the railroad tracks, martyring himself posthumously. He was setting up perpetual revenge against his ex and children for once he dies they can only seek to forgive themselves and their crimes were indeed heavy. He was lying to himself that due to his impending death, his children and grandson would be better off not reentering his life. A weak and flimsy excuse, at best.


Danger Man: Your title says it all. He truly was lost in a lonely world that he was thrust into, but always had the power to leave. He just couldn't see it.

Excellent thought provoking story! Class dismissed...

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by Anonymous06/26/10

A really Sad tale.

Your characters, including the ex-husband, are all sad examples of what human beings should represent. This leads me to believe that the Author is a sad example as well. Your stories are quite simple and childish... Read some of HDK or Ohio's stories and develope your characters so as to make them more sympathetic or hateful, whatever...

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by Anonymous07/19/10

what people do

Wendy Roger and Susan screwed over their husband/father, respectively. All the kings horses.... applies here. Susan made that gesture with the gifts and Wendy said those vicious things. Perhaps she'll tell the truth at some point? No. All of them can live with themselves, and that is what they do. Any money should go to some charity,more than those people. He was pushed there and adjusted, as did his former family

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by Anonymous09/01/10

wtf!?

"I am sorry for taking your family away from you but by refusing to establish a relationship with Roger and Wendy you are punishing them for a youthful folly. I have only wished for their happiness and if it makes them miserable to be away from you how can I be happy?" are you fucking kidding me? a youthful folly!? his kids were fucking assholes and they deserve to live the rest of their lives with the guilt and shame. youthful folly my ass. fuck them, fuck them all-they only want to see him to appease their guilt, not because they love or miss him. people dont change and i cant reconcile the change in their characters. they went from selfish, evil teenagers to what? respectable adults who now realize how fucked up they were? hell, most if not all kids are adults by 15, especially in this day and age.

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by 0649d09/16/10

my two cents

This is a very bitter story. It is MEANT to be written this way, so those criticising the ex-husband are missing the point - it is written for people who have reason to be bitter, and who just want to feel connections to other people, even fictional. Heck, the "loving wives" category with lots of revenge stories is for those who feel scorned. Yes, happiness is your own responsibility, but the feeling of bitterness can be overwhelming and take YEARS to get out of, especially if you lose those you love. Think about bereavement for dead close relatives. Then think of someone who broke your heart, and multiply that by 3.

I think the fact that he had a disease pushed him over the edge, because I am sure he's not insane and was not planning on heading for decades of upset feelings - if he didn't have the disease, I am betting he would have made his own life with a wonderful woman (I was going to say "another wonderful woman" but that would have been wrong) with children (or make children) by the time his former children came around!

To those criticisng how realistic it is, it is somewhat realistic. Everyone tends to suffer in a divorce, but fathers usually do come out worse in a divorce if they had been the main earners spending on the family. That, and the family courts are fucked cos of old laws that need rethinking (and reshaping) now! I just wish that he could have used proof of his ex fooling around with many different men to get custody so the bitch wouldn't be getting child support.

He's supposedly forgiven them, but I think he's just putting them on a guilt-trip, and he's partly convinced himself that he need not be happy because (I suspect) he's clinically depressed as a result of the divorce and the aftermath of his ex-wife's false allegations. In a sense he is living like a robot, just waking up and doing the same routine everyday, then going to sleep again. All his actions are a result of this - including the seemingly nonsensical way he talks and wants everyone to witness his rambling, which is why he says they should all come and visit for his next speech. People do all sorts of stupid things that a person in his right mind would NOT do! I know from my experience ... I once wrote a long apology letter and sent it. When I woke up from my funk, I was disgusted with myself!

His ex was a really shallow and callous bitch who even now is happy to deny the truth to the whole world and all his former friends who broke up with him. None of them can make it up to him and they are not even trying as they have not even thought of what to do to give him those years of his life back. The daughter can't take her gifts back from her father, the son can't give him all those years back and the wife is not going to tell the truth. It's as has been said just an attempt to remove their guilt.

I don't see why it took them 10 years - it shouldn't have taken more than 1 year for his children to realise they made a mistake, or 3 years at maximum (with his son being 18). Heck, they lived with him, and they believed his ex was on their side? They were old enough to have figured out the truth. I am thinking that he partly doesn't want to go back to them because it would be more painful for him to be with them than it would be for him to just think of them as he waits for death to approach - it's not so much about him dying on them! As GrumpyGamby has written in his comment, he still feels bitter and he cannot forget and nor can he completely forgive - 90% forgiveness, maybe, but 10% still bitter. He is deluding himself.

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by Anonymous10/26/10

a hero

the man is a hero. The one thing he should have done was spit in evil face that being his ex family.

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by Anonymous12/04/10

embelish D..ASS

nice start but u droped da ball cunt....mrbill

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by RePhil12/07/10

I guess your handle says it all

Death and depression seems always to be central to your stories. Too bad

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by BigJohn60101/05/11

The best revenge is supposed to be living well, but...

He was too easy on "his" family. He was the only one who really suffered because they were too concerned about themselves to care about him. He should have made sure to leave them nothing but grief instead of an inheritance. Make them see what their greedy souls were being denied and rubbed in their faces.

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by bigguy32301/16/11

I generally like your work. In this case I don't really like the main character so, it's hard to like the story.

As always, the story is well written. The issue for me is the wimpy response over time of the protagonist. He is just, ....well....wimpy. He had the courage to fight for his fair distribution in the divorce and to go on to earn a prosperous living after the divorce. Yet, he didn't have the courage to get on with living.

Sad. Too Sad.

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by Anonymous01/28/11

I liked it.

I live on the darker side of life, therefor I am able to relate to this story and enjoy it for the fine story that it is. Please continue, it give exercise to the thought process. R.T.

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by Celtic_Seeker03/22/11

True

We all live in a lost and lonely world!!!!

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by Anonymous07/25/11

what is he man, robot or even he is human-bing.he didnt even have 2 talk to them.is he even father of them???????? he should have take DNA test. and what kind of world he live? even he didnt do anything bad all friends and family member hate him and the wife and kids who do everything bad world love them

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by FD4509/16/11

Sorry

I like the last reveal. It was good.

That said, I found the writing very stilted. Almost painfully so. I've been guilty of it in my writing, so I'm not being a hypocrite.

and it's 'quiet' not 'quite'

The baby was quite quiet. Heck he was hardly breathing.

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by JLRemora09/16/11

This story brought out things that most of don't want to think about, much less experience. It was a dark story, filled with raw emotion, that left a man haunted by the past and the future. Is it easy to give up one's life due to resentment, anger and hurt? For most people, no, it wouldn't be easy, yet it occurs all the time. In the end, he was damned if he did and damned if he didn't. At least, through his rose colored glasses.

Even though the story was readable, with the pain and conviction shining through admirably, the overall "savor" of the story is a bitter one.

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