A Bad Day in Dream World

You have the makings of ....

...a writer but need to practice the format of a story, not just a 'passage'. For instance, since your description states it, have her actually "go" there, first. Not many people like to read one page out of the middle of a book.

This was confusing...

As the other person said, its like a passage out of the middle of a book. How did Gwen get there, what is the history of the dream world, and who is this lover of her's?

Not bad, not bad at all.

I've read quite a few tentacle sex stories, but not many authors can quite pull it off. You also brought a very surreal feeling to the story, quite appropriate to the setting. A highly creative and arousing tale, great work.

Pleasing

I can successfully say you executed this story i loved it best tentacle sex storie ever

Mmmm, i wouldnt call that a BAD day!! i would love to be double fucked by tentacles!