If you write a story in the first persons view, you put the reader in the place of your main character. I don't think that that many of your readers can indetify them self with the guy. Now tel me: how many men would walk away from seeing the wife act as a cheating bitch. I mean, how much of a low life can you be? Plain stupid.
Regards,
Umberto
by
Anonymous12/25/09
Stupid story about stupid people
Cheating wife fucks a nigger...dumbass hubby acts like it's a big secret..PUKE
Your wife has unprotected sex with another man. A man who obviously likes to play around with other women. She has sex at a party she is at supposedly with you. Has sex in front of other people - your friends. You see them and ...?
I guess you are into disrespect. Your non-reaction to her total disrespect for you in front of your friends and for her complete and utter disregard for your health is incomprehensible to me. Does it really mean nothing to you?
I'll give you a one for the writing.
by
Anonymous12/25/09
well that is very funny
the wife is a skunk. not only because she likes std's from a guy who fucks around and is known as such. no she even just gives a shit and just does it in the open. well die hard but never ask why.
by
Anonymous12/25/09
of course
the big, confident John Wayne type husband dived into his lovely wife's legs and started lapping up her cream left from the big Black man, like there's no tomorrow and everyone went home happy as can be!
"my god, honey, you tasted unbelievably good! I love those little crawlin' critters, hundreds of millions of them, as they slid down my throat, honey! we need to do this more often! I hope I didn't scoop up all of those crawly little critters left by your Black lovers, leaving your beautiful holes plenty, so they can keep you happy, too!"
I mean, come on, this is not all "fiction." some White men are really into this stuff. It is actually hilarious, if you look at these "big and confident" White men and how they run around, in hotel rooms, from one corner to the next, to video their wives being fucked and dumped on like trash dumpsters... and supposedly everyone goes home happy, even if the women are given STDs and HIV and other crap... supposedly the women, too, are in giddy mood over such things! LOL
by
Anonymous12/26/09
Wimppy69 the self cuck
Wonderful start as anything above your self cuck watching another fuck your ho will be an improvement.
Part 2 will be you raising a black bastard baby while she laughs at your sickness.
by
Anonymous12/26/09
and...
yeah, the grammar sucks also. "Her name was Helen." Oh, so what is her name now? Did she change it and if so why? Is the "hero" first person "I" or third person "He?"
by
Anonymous12/26/09
NO love. No respect. No Emotion
Just a fuckslut for niggers from now on. Welcome to the town of cucksville then move straight through to wimpsville and then the major town around here Niggerville. Enjoy yourself won't you? Or of course you could do what any self respecting real man would do. And cut off the niggers prick and serve it to your whore of a wife. Then you leave her and go and sit on a four foot spike and die very slowly.
by
Anonymous12/26/09
Best solution for fix this horrible posting
Is for kippy189 to just kill himself. Only a completley pathetic loser who has nothing close to a satifying sex life could even come close to thinking that this had anything to do with EROTIC. You sad, sick, ass.
by
Anonymous12/26/09
Booooorrrring!
Can we change this fro loving wives to wimpy cucks? Now that she fucked a black man and didn't seem to feel guilty about it...how many other men has she fucked?
Why the hell do you shallow minded bigots read these types of stories if you hate them so much? Myself, I like this story, however I think hubby should have gone down on his wife's creampie when they got home, then taken sloppy seconds. When he finished and took her pantyhose the rest of the way off he could have had her sit on his face so he could clean her up. I will look for more stories from you in the future, thanks.
Good story whether this is a one off fantasy or the start of a series thanks for sharing. The nice thing about writing a short piece of erotic fiction is not having to worry about consequences so ignore the knuckle dragging racist haters.
Well little dick, do you jack off thinking about black cocks, gee, sure glad I don't have a sorry assed whore for a wife, can't wait till she gets pregnant, loser.
by
Anonymous12/30/09
The Guys
That loved this story are bi or gay, Jeez, now there's a supprise.
by
Anonymous10/09/10
It was an effort, but not that good...
You write good dialogue, except for the "thoughts" that never get spoken.
Where was the conflict? Where was the indication that this is what the protag wanted to have happen? He surely did, since he did nothing to prevent it when he discovered it happening. He must have had this fantasy for some time, but you never shared that tidbit with us...
Where is the roll-a-coaster ride of emotions over the incident? Where is the buildup to the climax -- not her's but the story's?
Where was the indication that his wife longed for the antag to do her. Not simply do her, but at the home of one of her husband's fraternity brothers filled with frat brothers! The humiliation scale just got broken -- at least everyone else felt the humiliation that the protag should have felt. It would seem that the protag and wife will be invited to many more parties in the future.
Man has wife. Man takes wife to party. Wife gets screwed by another. Man gets aroused. Man wants seconds. Story over. Does that about sum it up?
English
Another wimp cuck story . . .
The author left out the creampie . . .
just sick
just sick get help for fucks sacks.
Stupid
If you write a story in the first persons view, you put the reader in the place of your main character. I don't think that that many of your readers can indetify them self with the guy. Now tel me: how many men would walk away from seeing the wife act as a cheating bitch. I mean, how much of a low life can you be? Plain stupid.
Regards,
Umberto
Stupid story about stupid people
Cheating wife fucks a nigger...dumbass hubby acts like it's a big secret..PUKE
Say what?
Your wife has unprotected sex with another man. A man who obviously likes to play around with other women. She has sex at a party she is at supposedly with you. Has sex in front of other people - your friends. You see them and ...?
I guess you are into disrespect. Your non-reaction to her total disrespect for you in front of your friends and for her complete and utter disregard for your health is incomprehensible to me. Does it really mean nothing to you?
I'll give you a one for the writing.
well that is very funny
the wife is a skunk. not only because she likes std's from a guy who fucks around and is known as such. no she even just gives a shit and just does it in the open. well die hard but never ask why.
of course
the big, confident John Wayne type husband dived into his lovely wife's legs and started lapping up her cream left from the big Black man, like there's no tomorrow and everyone went home happy as can be!
"my god, honey, you tasted unbelievably good! I love those little crawlin' critters, hundreds of millions of them, as they slid down my throat, honey! we need to do this more often! I hope I didn't scoop up all of those crawly little critters left by your Black lovers, leaving your beautiful holes plenty, so they can keep you happy, too!"
I mean, come on, this is not all "fiction." some White men are really into this stuff. It is actually hilarious, if you look at these "big and confident" White men and how they run around, in hotel rooms, from one corner to the next, to video their wives being fucked and dumped on like trash dumpsters... and supposedly everyone goes home happy, even if the women are given STDs and HIV and other crap... supposedly the women, too, are in giddy mood over such things! LOL
Wimppy69 the self cuck
Wonderful start as anything above your self cuck watching another fuck your ho will be an improvement.
Part 2 will be you raising a black bastard baby while she laughs at your sickness.
and...
yeah, the grammar sucks also. "Her name was Helen." Oh, so what is her name now? Did she change it and if so why? Is the "hero" first person "I" or third person "He?"
NO love. No respect. No Emotion
Just a fuckslut for niggers from now on. Welcome to the town of cucksville then move straight through to wimpsville and then the major town around here Niggerville. Enjoy yourself won't you? Or of course you could do what any self respecting real man would do. And cut off the niggers prick and serve it to your whore of a wife. Then you leave her and go and sit on a four foot spike and die very slowly.
Best solution for fix this horrible posting
Is for kippy189 to just kill himself. Only a completley pathetic loser who has nothing close to a satifying sex life could even come close to thinking that this had anything to do with EROTIC. You sad, sick, ass.
Booooorrrring!
Can we change this fro loving wives to wimpy cucks? Now that she fucked a black man and didn't seem to feel guilty about it...how many other men has she fucked?
Why?
Why the hell do you shallow minded bigots read these types of stories if you hate them so much? Myself, I like this story, however I think hubby should have gone down on his wife's creampie when they got home, then taken sloppy seconds. When he finished and took her pantyhose the rest of the way off he could have had her sit on his face so he could clean her up. I will look for more stories from you in the future, thanks.
Good story
Good story whether this is a one off fantasy or the start of a series thanks for sharing. The nice thing about writing a short piece of erotic fiction is not having to worry about consequences so ignore the knuckle dragging racist haters.
NIcely done
nice little hot tale! thanks!
Kippy
Well little dick, do you jack off thinking about black cocks, gee, sure glad I don't have a sorry assed whore for a wife, can't wait till she gets pregnant, loser.
The Guys
That loved this story are bi or gay, Jeez, now there's a supprise.
It was an effort, but not that good...
You write good dialogue, except for the "thoughts" that never get spoken.
Where was the conflict? Where was the indication that this is what the protag wanted to have happen? He surely did, since he did nothing to prevent it when he discovered it happening. He must have had this fantasy for some time, but you never shared that tidbit with us...
Where is the roll-a-coaster ride of emotions over the incident? Where is the buildup to the climax -- not her's but the story's?
Where was the indication that his wife longed for the antag to do her. Not simply do her, but at the home of one of her husband's fraternity brothers filled with frat brothers! The humiliation scale just got broken -- at least everyone else felt the humiliation that the protag should have felt. It would seem that the protag and wife will be invited to many more parties in the future.
Man has wife. Man takes wife to party. Wife gets screwed by another. Man gets aroused. Man wants seconds. Story over. Does that about sum it up?
1
1
1
1
1
1
Delightful!
They need the full threesome now!
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