I hope that the author would give us poor readers more of this outstanding story line. So hot and erotic that I would love to read that he fucked his mom too. Thanks for this post, and hope to read more of your work soon.
by
Anonymous03/02/10
a little tip
bone up on your anatomy and find out where and what a hymen actually is. This whole cherry BS just doesn't work. It shows you don't have a clue.
by
Anonymous03/16/10
Another Super cum
Every story the girl ALMOST swallows it all but some leaks out.;
Guys are not often fire hoses a few exceptions like peter north maybe so try and make it realistic at least and as for the suddenly getting ass fucked because her pussy was to sore lol HELLO virgin ass .
by
Anonymous05/12/10
good but
good but a few goofs and it needs a second chapter what happens when the weekend is over they still go to different colleges do they change and go the same or stay at seperate ones does he fuck his mom does anyone get pregnant you need to continue
You should consider a follow-up to this story.Like the other comments,does the mother get fucked also and what is the future for this family?
Mom may not have wanted her husband but she definitely wants her son and daughter. There have been no one else in her life since the breakup;possibly waiting for the opportune time to bring all three together for a closer and more intimate time together.Could a preganacy in the future be at all possible with the two women and the son/brother being the father of the children?
by
Anonymous03/05/11
wtf
no second chapter and where did katie get the tshirt at the hotel? you said none of them had any luggage so where did the tshirt come from you didn't have her take it off was it magic or a writer screwup that was not caught in proofreading. get off your lazy ass and write a second chapter and think about a rewrite for this one
DBRS
by
Anonymous05/11/11
A VERY SPECIAL BIRTHDAY
VERY DISAPOINTED your bio says you write long stories yet you fail to even finish this one pull your head out of your ass and start writing every comment on this story say the same thing continue so do it already
Please - more of the twins and mom loving, exploring, and enjoying each other - 'til death do them part.
by
Anonymous09/13/12
typical waste of time
no background this should be chapter two not one. a rush to sex with no character or plot build up. no end you just left us hanging as said before major screwups not caught in proofreading sounds like part of a porno script NOT AN EROTIC STORY.
by
Anonymous03/15/13
waste of time
as someone that CLAIMS to be more into character and plot development you SURE FAILED ON THIS ONE. no character development and no plot along with NO END add up to a waste of time DELETE AND REWRITE IT PROPERLY.
by
Anonymous03/28/13
Maybe it's not the most refined story, but i love it. A happy love story without conflicts but with hot sexscenes, and very well written as the Author always does; one of my favorite Author. Thank you Harding.
I didn't expect much from this, but it actually was a fairly good story. It would have been interesting if he'd done them both in the butt. Funny...it usually me that's the negative one in these posts.
Well I'm glad I wasn't the only reader that was annoyed with all of the sexual inacuracies and bullshit. Sheesh. Mind you, I *liked* the premise and plot idea! Kudos on that one, even if there wasn't a lot of character/plot development. (Could be fixed ina rewrite or follow up stories.
Annoyances:
1. Dude doesnt jack off in the shower. Now I get it if the purpose was for furthering the plot so he would still be hard when he got in bed, but it was the reason that was off. Didnt jack in the shower because he would leak in his boxers and it would show?! Bullshit. Jack off, cum, finish your shower, milk out any leftovers, get out and dry off and go to bed. Hell, if he *didn't* jack off he would be leaking a bit in his boxers, prolly already had!
2. Takes his sisters virginity and she says she desperately wants him to fuck her but she pulls off him? Now Im not a chick but having to re-enter a sore pussy instead of staying in there doesnt sound like something that sounds fun... Ill give you that one though. However, no guy, no matter how feelie/whipped/whatever, is going to beg off fucking a girl who is basically telling him to get his fucking dick back in there and finish the job! ...so if that was a twisted plot advancement to get in her ass it failed. Dude would have dived back in that pussy! (Caring brother or not!)
3. Unless she has been ass fucking herself with a zucchini every day, she isnt ooh-ing and aah-ing when he sticks a second finger in there. The word is discomfort. Gets to feel good for some, but not all. (At least this author wasnt shoving three fingers up her virgin pussy or ass saying it felt good like some authors have!) ...then she is basically loving it ip the ass with only a feeling of 'fullness'. Right. EVERY girl I've ever had anal sex with says it feels like they need to go take a shit (not with those words, mind you, hehe, but still...), it gets better and enjoyable for SOME, others never like it, and others just want you to get it the fuck out of their ass NOW! Heh.
....kudos for the author though for not laying on the bullshit about how tight her ass was the whole time he was fivkingit, the whole 'tight as a velvet glove' bullshit. Its tight for a few minutes then dialates open and isnt tight anymore, maybe the ring, if she squeezes, but most girls dont. Prolly more interested in working the clit to make it worth the effort. (Discounting the rare girls who actually get off hard on anal)
4. They both had agreed that mom basically gave the green flag, so not bloody likely I would be pulling my dick out of my sisters ass when Im fucking her unless mom was coming at me with a baseball bat or something! Lol.
There were a few more but I cant think of them and my index finger is tired of typing on the ipad!
...anyway, believe it or not this IS constructive criticism! Read some of the authors other stuff and enjoyed it! Keep writing! :)
I posted this under my name because the first thing the next person who reads this would bitch about would be me complaining but not having the balls to sign it. Next would be to say some shit like "if you dont have something good to say..," fortunately Im not 20 something growing up in the gimmie entitled generation that seems to be all about tolerance even when its not needed/deserved (not referring to the author!) or.... Oh hell, lemme stop before I get too high on the soap box! Lol.
Anyway, good story, just work on the reality aspects! ;)
Fuck all those assholes who are criticizing, as if they could do better. I don't see any of their stories here and most of them are even afraid to put their name to it.
CONGRATULATIONS ON A WONDERFUL FANTASY TALE. You showed again what a great story teller you are. Only criticism I have is calling the belly a stomach. I still rate this a five, but I would have enjoyed it even more if I had not had to pause to interpret stomach to belly all those times. Also I would have liked a little more. THANKS FOR SHARING!
Screw the critics, I loved the story. I wish there was a second part where Mom and Sister get every hole filled and maybe even have children from this young man. Again, kudos.
A little surprised that Katie went right to fucking. Maybe a little more discussion, but still enjoyed the story
by
Anonymous12/21/16
Lol, its like the poor boy is brain dammaged... He's popped her cherry, she's begging him to fuck her, but noooo. What? It hurt sis? Well now that Ive done the damage and you're suffered the worst of the pain, lemme just go ahead and pull out and deprive you of any possible pleasure in this deal! Lemme go ahead and fuck your ass, everyone says that hurts lots! Rofl.
English
More
I hope that you are going to write a sequel to this story. It was very good and well written.
EXTREMELY HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Well written, hope more chapters follow very soon.! Thank You
Outstanding!
Great incest tale so far. You definitely need to take this one further. Gives us more chapters, please!
More!
Please continue the story with more sex and also explanations of what brought this on from the mother's perspective.
really well written,hot and erotic
I hope that the author would give us poor readers more of this outstanding story line. So hot and erotic that I would love to read that he fucked his mom too. Thanks for this post, and hope to read more of your work soon.
a little tip
bone up on your anatomy and find out where and what a hymen actually is. This whole cherry BS just doesn't work. It shows you don't have a clue.
Another Super cum
Every story the girl ALMOST swallows it all but some leaks out.;
Guys are not often fire hoses a few exceptions like peter north maybe so try and make it realistic at least and as for the suddenly getting ass fucked because her pussy was to sore lol HELLO virgin ass .
good but
good but a few goofs and it needs a second chapter what happens when the weekend is over they still go to different colleges do they change and go the same or stay at seperate ones does he fuck his mom does anyone get pregnant you need to continue
Do a Follow-Up to This Story
You should consider a follow-up to this story.Like the other comments,does the mother get fucked also and what is the future for this family?
Mom may not have wanted her husband but she definitely wants her son and daughter. There have been no one else in her life since the breakup;possibly waiting for the opportune time to bring all three together for a closer and more intimate time together.Could a preganacy in the future be at all possible with the two women and the son/brother being the father of the children?
wtf
no second chapter and where did katie get the tshirt at the hotel? you said none of them had any luggage so where did the tshirt come from you didn't have her take it off was it magic or a writer screwup that was not caught in proofreading. get off your lazy ass and write a second chapter and think about a rewrite for this one
DBRS
A VERY SPECIAL BIRTHDAY
VERY DISAPOINTED your bio says you write long stories yet you fail to even finish this one pull your head out of your ass and start writing every comment on this story say the same thing continue so do it already
That's it?!?!?!
Don't get me wrong, it's an amazing story!!!!!
I'm just bummed that that's the end of it... please write more to this!!!!!
WOW, A great story!! Just very short and not as much character buildup. I hope you add on to it later. Keep up the Great work.
More, please
Please - more of the twins and mom loving, exploring, and enjoying each other - 'til death do them part.
typical waste of time
no background this should be chapter two not one. a rush to sex with no character or plot build up. no end you just left us hanging as said before major screwups not caught in proofreading sounds like part of a porno script NOT AN EROTIC STORY.
waste of time
as someone that CLAIMS to be more into character and plot development you SURE FAILED ON THIS ONE. no character development and no plot along with NO END add up to a waste of time DELETE AND REWRITE IT PROPERLY.
Maybe it's not the most refined story, but i love it. A happy love story without conflicts but with hot sexscenes, and very well written as the Author always does; one of my favorite Author. Thank you Harding.
Nice
I didn't expect much from this, but it actually was a fairly good story. It would have been interesting if he'd done them both in the butt. Funny...it usually me that's the negative one in these posts.
Well I'm glad I wasn't the only reader that was annoyed with all of the sexual inacuracies and bullshit. Sheesh. Mind you, I *liked* the premise and plot idea! Kudos on that one, even if there wasn't a lot of character/plot development. (Could be fixed ina rewrite or follow up stories.
Annoyances:
1. Dude doesnt jack off in the shower. Now I get it if the purpose was for furthering the plot so he would still be hard when he got in bed, but it was the reason that was off. Didnt jack in the shower because he would leak in his boxers and it would show?! Bullshit. Jack off, cum, finish your shower, milk out any leftovers, get out and dry off and go to bed. Hell, if he *didn't* jack off he would be leaking a bit in his boxers, prolly already had!
2. Takes his sisters virginity and she says she desperately wants him to fuck her but she pulls off him? Now Im not a chick but having to re-enter a sore pussy instead of staying in there doesnt sound like something that sounds fun... Ill give you that one though. However, no guy, no matter how feelie/whipped/whatever, is going to beg off fucking a girl who is basically telling him to get his fucking dick back in there and finish the job! ...so if that was a twisted plot advancement to get in her ass it failed. Dude would have dived back in that pussy! (Caring brother or not!)
3. Unless she has been ass fucking herself with a zucchini every day, she isnt ooh-ing and aah-ing when he sticks a second finger in there. The word is discomfort. Gets to feel good for some, but not all. (At least this author wasnt shoving three fingers up her virgin pussy or ass saying it felt good like some authors have!) ...then she is basically loving it ip the ass with only a feeling of 'fullness'. Right. EVERY girl I've ever had anal sex with says it feels like they need to go take a shit (not with those words, mind you, hehe, but still...), it gets better and enjoyable for SOME, others never like it, and others just want you to get it the fuck out of their ass NOW! Heh.
....kudos for the author though for not laying on the bullshit about how tight her ass was the whole time he was fivkingit, the whole 'tight as a velvet glove' bullshit. Its tight for a few minutes then dialates open and isnt tight anymore, maybe the ring, if she squeezes, but most girls dont. Prolly more interested in working the clit to make it worth the effort. (Discounting the rare girls who actually get off hard on anal)
4. They both had agreed that mom basically gave the green flag, so not bloody likely I would be pulling my dick out of my sisters ass when Im fucking her unless mom was coming at me with a baseball bat or something! Lol.
There were a few more but I cant think of them and my index finger is tired of typing on the ipad!
...anyway, believe it or not this IS constructive criticism! Read some of the authors other stuff and enjoyed it! Keep writing! :)
I posted this under my name because the first thing the next person who reads this would bitch about would be me complaining but not having the balls to sign it. Next would be to say some shit like "if you dont have something good to say..," fortunately Im not 20 something growing up in the gimmie entitled generation that seems to be all about tolerance even when its not needed/deserved (not referring to the author!) or.... Oh hell, lemme stop before I get too high on the soap box! Lol.
Anyway, good story, just work on the reality aspects! ;)
I liked it
Fuck all those assholes who are criticizing, as if they could do better. I don't see any of their stories here and most of them are even afraid to put their name to it.
I enjoyed it.
Fuck the critics...
UNUSUAL THREESOME
CONGRATULATIONS ON A WONDERFUL FANTASY TALE. You showed again what a great story teller you are. Only criticism I have is calling the belly a stomach. I still rate this a five, but I would have enjoyed it even more if I had not had to pause to interpret stomach to belly all those times. Also I would have liked a little more. THANKS FOR SHARING!
Great Story
Screw the critics, I loved the story. I wish there was a second part where Mom and Sister get every hole filled and maybe even have children from this young man. Again, kudos.
DID he ever fuck her?
NO just a dirty butt fuck. poor guy maybe he can find a pussy somewhere???
good story -
A little surprised that Katie went right to fucking. Maybe a little more discussion, but still enjoyed the story
Lol, its like the poor boy is brain dammaged... He's popped her cherry, she's begging him to fuck her, but noooo. What? It hurt sis? Well now that Ive done the damage and you're suffered the worst of the pain, lemme just go ahead and pull out and deprive you of any possible pleasure in this deal! Lemme go ahead and fuck your ass, everyone says that hurts lots! Rofl.
Humor aside, the story was terrific!!
Definitely hot but ...
... a little over the top for me, so, 4 Stars.
But hey, different strokes and all that.
RaM
So f*€king sexy!!! Gawd that was good! Please keep writing !!!
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