Thank you, DG, for ending it in the best possible way as far as I am concerned.
As I have said many times, I love happy endings and I don't want to be depressed by sad situations in my reading. A few I can stand but a lot of angst etc. bothers me. I'm an old man and I like pleasant stories, a little betrayal and incest, an occasional murder of the bad guys are all fine. I don't like to see desperate people fucking themselves and others up all the time. Thank you for your pleasant stories that mostly end well.
What a mess. Cheating, lying wife. Backstabbing "best" friend. A mother who only cares about herself and has no loyalty to her own family. Disgusting. Beth seemed like a decent woman, but who knows, in this world betrayal is only a dick length away.
One of the best stories I've read thus far. Thank you for writing it. I liked how you still left enough unsaid and left just enough questions unanswered that made this story true to life. It is very rare that we get concrete answers as to the why and the how. We don't know if Amy and Brent had done it before. We may never know. All we know is that she couldn't be trusted. I give that marriage a few years before it is breaking down. There is no way they could trust each other. I have to admit, up until the wedding reception I felt a little sorry for Amy. She had a drinking problem and made two stupid choices (that we know of). After all of that, she gets drunk enough at her own reception to cheat again? I hope that they get divorced and Brent has to pay child support for all of the kids. That would teach him to keep his dick in his pants.
by
Anonymous08/09/13
An interesting story and even more-so, the perceptive comments.
Obviously, the character Amy should have been put down asap, so that the gene pool would not be as tainted as it turned out. Item #2, the Brent character should have been castrated by standing still & restrained to also eliminate further contamination of the human gene pool. The main wimp character should have been lobotomized and sent to the gay district in SFO to die from Aids because 80% of the male human species is not completely as stupid and disgusting [unfortunately the other 15-20% consists of those faggots like MattM, wantswhiteboys and other cuckold authors]. Frankly, this submission appears to have a setting in some demented trailer-trash neighborhood or some prolific nigger city/state. Pathetic at best, sad & delusional at least. Seriously, author, WTF were you thinking or tripping out on when you submitted this fecal matter?
Moms dont care about the kids more than dads, they may gush more but not love them more, but all those signal mom dude..yes who are told they dont need men that they can do it on there own: ie 70% divorce filed but women not men, so why stay, men are told everyday they are not needed for love or fatherhood, this bitch believed this shit about doing what she wanted and modern moms are becoming more and more like this female, plus i still get kids tested from Beth she played the mind game with the other guy trick kinda makes her a slut in training does it once and get away with it she will do it again, kinda like the modern western women's mentality.
I thought John was pretty consistent throughout; a little irrational and high strung, but incredibly loyal. Amy had a good one, but let him slip away. Brent was weak. Beth was a good girl and proved her worth. I imagine Brent and Amy will have less than a happy life; they seemed to have drifted into each other by default. That could be said for John and Beth too, but I got the impression they had a lot more substance. I feel sorry for Cindy, and I hope she got someone better.
So Amy LOVES her husband... but after only enough alcohol to put a buzz on though not enough to be drunk out of her gourd she allows another man to screw her... And gives him a blowjob..? And this when the man in question she already knows sucks as a lover...?
I mean I'm confused... is she just really stupid...? She knows her libido gets out of control when she's drinking but she still drinks...?
And both Beth and Brent knew the same thing and yet Brent still had sex with her in that condition...? Oh yeah, that's rape. If he knew she experienced diminished capacity when drinking and had sex with her then he KNEW he was raping her, no matter whether she said to go for it , so he can just delude himself, I don't believe it.
And knowing he did it - effectively raping her, she decides to MARRY him...? Did I ask if she was stupid yet...???
And John REALLY loves Beth...? But just had to screw Amy...? What is with people and alcohol....? The only time I was drunk enough to have maybe done things I'd not have done sober I was too drunk to remember doing ANYTHING.
Here's the deal. When drunk Amy would fuck anybody. Damn what a quality person. Brent was an asshole the whole time. Luckily for Beth and John they ended up together. Happily ever after. I guess as happy you can be in fiction and fantasy.
Just one question unanswered. Is John the father of Amy's last child? I hope so.
All's well that end's well
"He's paying me child support but no alimony since I divorced him."
Since when does alimony depend on who does the divorce? If anything, since the one who does the divorcing tends to be the injured party, that should make a stronger argument for alimony.
situations will cause a movement to force the time and sands to relocate. TK U MLJ LV NV
by
Anonymous08/04/14
What a group of screw ups!!!
You should have put the final nail in all their coffins by admitting that John got Amy pregnant when he screwed her in the bathroom at their wedding reception. I don't see how this group can stand the sight of one another. And they'll be seeing each other A LOT due to the kids they share. One day I expect one of them to open up a can of whoop ass on another one of the. Convoluted tale that I found to be slightly unbelievable, even for fiction.
Five stars overall, but the wife hooking up with Brent just seems inexplicable. I really don't know who she is - a slut who was cheating all along, or a loving wife who made bad choices.
Blatant predictability is NOT a good quality in an author. If you plan on writing more than one chapter to a story, then don't give away so much of the ending in the first few chapters. As well written as this was, a reader could have stopped at chapter 2, and would not have missed a thing! You gave the reader too little credit in chapter 2, and therefore gave away your ending in a some very obvious writing. As an author, you want to keep the reader interested enough to come back again,(I assume, anyway), so too much information too soon works against you.
There's a fine line between keeping readers hooked, and giving away your whole plot, so I think you need to tread a little lighter at times.
Amy and Brent – I DO believe that Amy was out of it, and thought that Brent was John, if she knew it was Brent she never would have let him fuck her. BRENT on the other hand, knew full well what he was doing.
Why hasn’t Beth had sex since the reunion?
God, if the two cheaters can be happy(?) together, why not to two loyal spouses who have always had affection for each other?
Let’s see, Amy and Brent cheated on John and Beth, slept together before they were even divorced, while John and Beth wouldn’t even have a dinner date till the divorces were final, and Amy is getting all uppity?!
Why is Beth upset? She said that she would tell him when she was going to be with another man so “That way, if you wanted to break off our friendship agreement we can do so." He’s just taking her up on her offer.
They had no commitment, why should she expect HIM to stop HER? If she loves him and doesn’t want to go on the date, DON’T GO ON THE DATE!
but I think it's time to tell Mom to stop seeing Amy and Matthew. Just too damn convenient that John and Beth (separately) were at the Holiday Inn where Brent and Amy were having their wedding reception.
So... He divorced Amy because he didn't want to raise Brents kid. But then he marries Beth, and raised TWO of Brents kids?
This guy should have sold everything and moved to the other side of the country.
As with Amy, I can't help but wonder how stupid HE is...
While in his home, he goes up to a female friend and starts to cop a feel...
Now, either he's hoping she's SO out of it that she won't notice - CLEARLY making any sexually slanted action rape... Or, BEFORE she indicated a desire for him to continue he RISKED her not only SCREAMING rape but also him getting divorced and having HER husband beat the shit out of him with cause...
And the morning following she said nothing to him, gave him no indication of ANY change in their relationship... and he STILL didn't think that it might be rape...? Delusional fool... think if she really remembered something happened there wouldn't have been SOME change in her...?
With two parents like Brent and Amy I worry for the future of Matthew... poor child will probably turn out to be too stupid to do anything...
And to throw in another thought about Amy and other characters like her... someone, like Brent, does something before, during or after a sexual encounter that, even if it didn't result in the other person's divorce, is reprehensible... and yet the "Amy"-character still goes BACK to them...? Doesn't hate, despise, abhor, detest, yada, yada, yada them now and forever...? And I'm not counting the "I'm being blackmailed back" scenarios, only referring to the willingly went back people... if that's realistic it's scary how stupid it is...
It's nice that John seems to be happy with Beth, but it seems like Brent didn't suffer anything except getting with the lesser woman. He ruined two marriages, and if Amy is to believed, is a rapist, though why she would then marry him and not go to the police I don't know.
by
Anonymous02/27/16
Dueling banjo's.
Really poor characters, wife gets drunk and just spreads them for anyone. She has no control whenever she drinks. Then stop drinking you lush. How drunk do you need to be that you lose all your reasonong. Best friend gropes and rapes the drunk wife. She regrets the coupling so much and resents the rape so much she marries her rapist. Really? Then loser husband beds best friends wife and rases his ex-wifes rapists kids. You sure thses people in your story do't live in the backwoods of Kentucky. Rated 2 and that's generous fill out your characters,
by
Anonymous02/27/16
The wife sounds like your wife dear annony!!
And you are an asshole as usual!! 5 for effort and content.
by
Anonymous09/08/16
AAH TAKE THE COMMENTS LIKE A GRAIN OF SALT
Fuck sake! This is LITEROTICA expect the unexpected! So she cheated on John with Mark remember that got a ticket to the after life! Then Brent fucks her they have a baby get MARRIED but Amy gats fucked by John now she's pregnant, John marries Beth now she's pregnant (man I'm getting a headache) as the author said Who knows Amy may have John's Baby? Man! I hope I got it alright? Story is Fantastic! Love you all GREG! OH 100 % OF READING ENJOYMENT BYE.
by
Anonymous11/28/16
Amy is just a drunken slut
who will open her legs for any man after a drink or three...Brent basically raped her as she was to drunk to resist...but would it stand up in court....then she fucks Mark when drunk too...just a real whore...what happened to Cindy after she shot her cheating husband...nothing more was said about her or the kids....at least he go together with Beth and will have a far more loving life with her...just a pity he never got even with Brad...should have beaten 9 colours of shit out of him and castrated him too...what a sleaze....overall a good story...he should have got even with Amy too and as for his mom sticking up for her he should have told her to go to helll...what an old cow she was...
But lacking the drama of the first few chapters. We went from fifth gear, to third gear to...well, second.
It is a good story...no buts.
Getting a good dramatic ending is hard. My enjoyment of each chapter mirrored the number on each chapter.
by
Anonymous12/01/16
1*
What a bunch of assholes. Every last one. They deserve whatever happens to them. Death by AIDS would be good.
by
Anonymous12/13/16
W.T.F.
So Amy was a slut after all! Just how many times, how many men! It won't last Amy's new marriage! She already cheating on Brent and pregnant no less! What a fucked up couple! Story is good but not great! Love you all! GREG. OH 90 % OF READING ENJOYMENT BYE.
English
2 of 3
Chapters 1 and 2 were great; 3 was a bit less.
Overall not bad.
Thx
Thank you, DG, for ending it in the best possible way as far as I am concerned.
As I have said many times, I love happy endings and I don't want to be depressed by sad situations in my reading. A few I can stand but a lot of angst etc. bothers me. I'm an old man and I like pleasant stories, a little betrayal and incest, an occasional murder of the bad guys are all fine. I don't like to see desperate people fucking themselves and others up all the time. Thank you for your pleasant stories that mostly end well.
Hate
The mom don't care how much you love children you are babysitting a child from YOUR SON cheating spouse. Oh and his dad is also weak.
Yuck
What a mess. Cheating, lying wife. Backstabbing "best" friend. A mother who only cares about herself and has no loyalty to her own family. Disgusting. Beth seemed like a decent woman, but who knows, in this world betrayal is only a dick length away.
Excellent story
One of the best stories I've read thus far. Thank you for writing it. I liked how you still left enough unsaid and left just enough questions unanswered that made this story true to life. It is very rare that we get concrete answers as to the why and the how. We don't know if Amy and Brent had done it before. We may never know. All we know is that she couldn't be trusted. I give that marriage a few years before it is breaking down. There is no way they could trust each other. I have to admit, up until the wedding reception I felt a little sorry for Amy. She had a drinking problem and made two stupid choices (that we know of). After all of that, she gets drunk enough at her own reception to cheat again? I hope that they get divorced and Brent has to pay child support for all of the kids. That would teach him to keep his dick in his pants.
An interesting story and even more-so, the perceptive comments.
Obviously, the character Amy should have been put down asap, so that the gene pool would not be as tainted as it turned out. Item #2, the Brent character should have been castrated by standing still & restrained to also eliminate further contamination of the human gene pool. The main wimp character should have been lobotomized and sent to the gay district in SFO to die from Aids because 80% of the male human species is not completely as stupid and disgusting [unfortunately the other 15-20% consists of those faggots like MattM, wantswhiteboys and other cuckold authors]. Frankly, this submission appears to have a setting in some demented trailer-trash neighborhood or some prolific nigger city/state. Pathetic at best, sad & delusional at least. Seriously, author, WTF were you thinking or tripping out on when you submitted this fecal matter?
A real truth in this story
Moms dont care about the kids more than dads, they may gush more but not love them more, but all those signal mom dude..yes who are told they dont need men that they can do it on there own: ie 70% divorce filed but women not men, so why stay, men are told everyday they are not needed for love or fatherhood, this bitch believed this shit about doing what she wanted and modern moms are becoming more and more like this female, plus i still get kids tested from Beth she played the mind game with the other guy trick kinda makes her a slut in training does it once and get away with it she will do it again, kinda like the modern western women's mentality.
I liked it.
I thought John was pretty consistent throughout; a little irrational and high strung, but incredibly loyal. Amy had a good one, but let him slip away. Brent was weak. Beth was a good girl and proved her worth. I imagine Brent and Amy will have less than a happy life; they seemed to have drifted into each other by default. That could be said for John and Beth too, but I got the impression they had a lot more substance. I feel sorry for Cindy, and I hope she got someone better.
Ok, what gives here...?
So Amy LOVES her husband... but after only enough alcohol to put a buzz on though not enough to be drunk out of her gourd she allows another man to screw her... And gives him a blowjob..? And this when the man in question she already knows sucks as a lover...?
I mean I'm confused... is she just really stupid...? She knows her libido gets out of control when she's drinking but she still drinks...?
And both Beth and Brent knew the same thing and yet Brent still had sex with her in that condition...? Oh yeah, that's rape. If he knew she experienced diminished capacity when drinking and had sex with her then he KNEW he was raping her, no matter whether she said to go for it , so he can just delude himself, I don't believe it.
And knowing he did it - effectively raping her, she decides to MARRY him...? Did I ask if she was stupid yet...???
And John REALLY loves Beth...? But just had to screw Amy...? What is with people and alcohol....? The only time I was drunk enough to have maybe done things I'd not have done sober I was too drunk to remember doing ANYTHING.
Nice
Here's the deal. When drunk Amy would fuck anybody. Damn what a quality person. Brent was an asshole the whole time. Luckily for Beth and John they ended up together. Happily ever after. I guess as happy you can be in fiction and fantasy.
Just one question unanswered. Is John the father of Amy's last child? I hope so.
All's well that end's well
HA
Huh?
"He's paying me child support but no alimony since I divorced him."
Since when does alimony depend on who does the divorce? If anything, since the one who does the divorcing tends to be the injured party, that should make a stronger argument for alimony.
AND IF LIFE CANT GO ON
situations will cause a movement to force the time and sands to relocate. TK U MLJ LV NV
What a group of screw ups!!!
You should have put the final nail in all their coffins by admitting that John got Amy pregnant when he screwed her in the bathroom at their wedding reception. I don't see how this group can stand the sight of one another. And they'll be seeing each other A LOT due to the kids they share. One day I expect one of them to open up a can of whoop ass on another one of the. Convoluted tale that I found to be slightly unbelievable, even for fiction.
Loved it
Five stars overall, but the wife hooking up with Brent just seems inexplicable. I really don't know who she is - a slut who was cheating all along, or a loving wife who made bad choices.
TRUST AND VERIFY
friends, enemies and intentions. TK U MLJ LV NV
Despite what you may have been told
Blatant predictability is NOT a good quality in an author. If you plan on writing more than one chapter to a story, then don't give away so much of the ending in the first few chapters. As well written as this was, a reader could have stopped at chapter 2, and would not have missed a thing! You gave the reader too little credit in chapter 2, and therefore gave away your ending in a some very obvious writing. As an author, you want to keep the reader interested enough to come back again,(I assume, anyway), so too much information too soon works against you.
There's a fine line between keeping readers hooked, and giving away your whole plot, so I think you need to tread a little lighter at times.
More Thoughts
Amy and Brent – I DO believe that Amy was out of it, and thought that Brent was John, if she knew it was Brent she never would have let him fuck her. BRENT on the other hand, knew full well what he was doing.
Why hasn’t Beth had sex since the reunion?
God, if the two cheaters can be happy(?) together, why not to two loyal spouses who have always had affection for each other?
Let’s see, Amy and Brent cheated on John and Beth, slept together before they were even divorced, while John and Beth wouldn’t even have a dinner date till the divorces were final, and Amy is getting all uppity?!
Why is Beth upset? She said that she would tell him when she was going to be with another man so “That way, if you wanted to break off our friendship agreement we can do so." He’s just taking her up on her offer.
They had no commitment, why should she expect HIM to stop HER? If she loves him and doesn’t want to go on the date, DON’T GO ON THE DATE!
Makes you want to start drinking
Because you have so much fun and make such great choices!
Well done,
but I think it's time to tell Mom to stop seeing Amy and Matthew. Just too damn convenient that John and Beth (separately) were at the Holiday Inn where Brent and Amy were having their wedding reception.
Brents kids
So... He divorced Amy because he didn't want to raise Brents kid. But then he marries Beth, and raised TWO of Brents kids?
This guy should have sold everything and moved to the other side of the country.
Ok, some thoughts about Brent this time...
As with Amy, I can't help but wonder how stupid HE is...
While in his home, he goes up to a female friend and starts to cop a feel...
Now, either he's hoping she's SO out of it that she won't notice - CLEARLY making any sexually slanted action rape... Or, BEFORE she indicated a desire for him to continue he RISKED her not only SCREAMING rape but also him getting divorced and having HER husband beat the shit out of him with cause...
And the morning following she said nothing to him, gave him no indication of ANY change in their relationship... and he STILL didn't think that it might be rape...? Delusional fool... think if she really remembered something happened there wouldn't have been SOME change in her...?
With two parents like Brent and Amy I worry for the future of Matthew... poor child will probably turn out to be too stupid to do anything...
And to throw in another thought about Amy and other characters like her... someone, like Brent, does something before, during or after a sexual encounter that, even if it didn't result in the other person's divorce, is reprehensible... and yet the "Amy"-character still goes BACK to them...? Doesn't hate, despise, abhor, detest, yada, yada, yada them now and forever...? And I'm not counting the "I'm being blackmailed back" scenarios, only referring to the willingly went back people... if that's realistic it's scary how stupid it is...
Brent needs to be punished
It's nice that John seems to be happy with Beth, but it seems like Brent didn't suffer anything except getting with the lesser woman. He ruined two marriages, and if Amy is to believed, is a rapist, though why she would then marry him and not go to the police I don't know.
Dueling banjo's.
Really poor characters, wife gets drunk and just spreads them for anyone. She has no control whenever she drinks. Then stop drinking you lush. How drunk do you need to be that you lose all your reasonong. Best friend gropes and rapes the drunk wife. She regrets the coupling so much and resents the rape so much she marries her rapist. Really? Then loser husband beds best friends wife and rases his ex-wifes rapists kids. You sure thses people in your story do't live in the backwoods of Kentucky. Rated 2 and that's generous fill out your characters,
The wife sounds like your wife dear annony!!
And you are an asshole as usual!! 5 for effort and content.
AAH TAKE THE COMMENTS LIKE A GRAIN OF SALT
Fuck sake! This is LITEROTICA expect the unexpected! So she cheated on John with Mark remember that got a ticket to the after life! Then Brent fucks her they have a baby get MARRIED but Amy gats fucked by John now she's pregnant, John marries Beth now she's pregnant (man I'm getting a headache) as the author said Who knows Amy may have John's Baby? Man! I hope I got it alright? Story is Fantastic! Love you all GREG! OH 100 % OF READING ENJOYMENT BYE.
Amy is just a drunken slut
who will open her legs for any man after a drink or three...Brent basically raped her as she was to drunk to resist...but would it stand up in court....then she fucks Mark when drunk too...just a real whore...what happened to Cindy after she shot her cheating husband...nothing more was said about her or the kids....at least he go together with Beth and will have a far more loving life with her...just a pity he never got even with Brad...should have beaten 9 colours of shit out of him and castrated him too...what a sleaze....overall a good story...he should have got even with Amy too and as for his mom sticking up for her he should have told her to go to helll...what an old cow she was...
Likable
But lacking the drama of the first few chapters. We went from fifth gear, to third gear to...well, second.
It is a good story...no buts.
Getting a good dramatic ending is hard. My enjoyment of each chapter mirrored the number on each chapter.
1*
What a bunch of assholes. Every last one. They deserve whatever happens to them. Death by AIDS would be good.
W.T.F.
So Amy was a slut after all! Just how many times, how many men! It won't last Amy's new marriage! She already cheating on Brent and pregnant no less! What a fucked up couple! Story is good but not great! Love you all! GREG. OH 90 % OF READING ENJOYMENT BYE.
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