Incredible story! I didn't even skim over any of it. So many stories are filled with endless minutia, it drives me crazy. This story was captivating from first word to last. Good ending!
by
Anonymous01/05/11
beyond hot
quite an ending for a remarkable story... Dark yet not, Lots of passion and thought... thank you
by
Anonymous05/25/11
OMG
That was great! No desire to get ready for work now.
could be worth getting my ass raped dry and ripped apart and my shoulder muscles severely torn. Some of the stuff you describe in this story is physically dangerous--safe and sane, not so much. You're a dom in real life, right? Do you actually treat your subs this severely, and if so, do you drive them to the emergency room when they need medical care?
by
Anonymous11/15/12
no club
Bondage as you describe is what causes individuals to have borderline personalities - cutting so that they know they are alive. This is definitely the last story I will read of this type. Someone told me that I had a submissive personality and maybe there are times that I do what my husband wants but I will never ,ever allow someone to treat me the way that these stories portray. I am not into pain and I think it is sad that this kind of behavior exists and that dominant people use abuse, sexual as well physical abuse to get their high. SAD SAD SAD, that some people are to hung up on themselves that to make themselves feel powerful, they can only do this by/ through pain of another. Pain does not beget pleasure, it only promote low self esteem for the submissive. Mutual adult game playing is between them. In your story, the submissive said her safe word twice and she wasn't released. So for all those individuals who choose to be a dominant, think twice if the roles were reversed, would they still be getting high as the new submissive.
by
Anonymous04/27/13
I like...
it like this! Down and dirty, and straight to the action. Yes indeed -- you can make my day any time. Take care...
PS: This story is not about romance. Be warned or be entertained. But proceed to read with full knowledge.
by
Anonymous04/30/13
Anonymous: "Bondage as you describe is what causes individuals to have borderline personalities... In your story, the submissive said her safe word twice and she wasn't released. So for all those individuals who choose to be a dominant, think twice if the roles were reversed, would they still be getting high as the new submissive."
I don't recall her ever saying the safe word. At least, not while conscious- she was dreaming when she said it the two times that you are referring to. If you're going to use something from the story in your argument, perhaps you should pay better attention to what you're reading.
In reality this was torture not true Master/slave. From what I read of BDSM it is supposed to be mutual. I would probably collapse and or pass out in this set up. With the abusive childhood I had and my inability to orgasm now Plus the dry mouth I get when masturbating I would be dehydrated. Plus the length of time the nipple clamps were on would probably cause nerve damage to my nipples. I usually like M/s D/s stories but this one led me to believe this was one sadistic man who is by no means a good Master. I don't think he would have stopped even if she had used the safe word. He was not even looking out for her health. He is the kind who would put her in the hospital almost dead and laugh. I gave the stars but I think it was still more about torture. Again since I don't orgasm easily and most times not at all I would find this not very enjoyable. I sure hope if it were true, Allison finds it was worth it. If you really liked it you must be sadistic as well. Not exactly what I see as true BDSM from what I have read about it. Course I still read it all. Had to find out the ending.
Where does she go from here? Does she still play with her boys? Does the contract pan out? I'd like to see the changes in her life because I believe this would be a life changing experience.
by
Anonymous01/01/14
Not being in that Life Style
I have a couple naive questions
1) Are YOU part of this life style, or is this just your twisted mind at work
2) After the psychic break she has just suffered, do you really think she will EVER be a Domme again? Really?
3) Unprepared dry anal penetration with a normal sized cock would result in tearing, and you have gone out of your way to describe him as much larger than average, and with absolutely NO preparation at all. So where is the accompanying tearing?
4) Where is the warning of severe pain and torture? That's what this is, after all, no matter how you dress it up
by
Anonymous01/24/14
What a crock of crap
Just what anyone needs - to be tortured. And given the short period of time involved
there is simply no way he broke her spirit. Just an awful story of abuse and torture.
by
Anonymous01/26/14
From a grateful slave
As a practicing bdsm slave I am glad to see you do it right. There are many levels of domination and you covered several of them as well as showing proper safety procedure. Mark reminds me much of my own master stern and unyeilding except he isn't such a dark bad boy. I would love to see more of Mark. Perhaps a series all his own. Either way thank you for your masterful imagery.
This story is a condensed version that is part of a full length novel. For anyone looking for the full story behind this initiation and the "Circle" please contact me through my lit homepage and I can tell you how to find it.
The story was okay I guess, though I seriously doubt most dominants would agree to the deal. Most sexual dominants aren't emotionally strong people, thus the need to have someone submit to their desires. As for any other critiques...the physical results of unprepared anal sex, etc, those have already been covered. My personal biggest gripe was your continued use of the word "lied", when you meant "lay" or "laid".
Allison would not have "lied" there, she would have "lay" there. If you're going to be a writer, please work more diligently on proper grammar. Other than a few errors along those lines, the tale was mildly interesting as a clash of wills. I really don't get off on pain and torture as part of a sexual experience, so I can't say I found the story erotic, but undoubtedly some did and that's fine. Different strokes for different folks and all that.
by
Anonymous11/02/15
Different from SWB
What happened in this story was supposed to be a 'fleshed out' version of the 5 minute highlight video of the 3 hour session Mark used in SWB, but the actions are different from the highlights given.
I enjoyed the story and the preceding one as well as the entire SWB series (Samhain was a particularly hot one lol) this just jumped out as significantly different.
Keep up the good work.
S
I believe you have this mixed up with a different girl. I think you are referring to "Ashley Winthrop" and what Mark did to her to get Alex off his back in the Winthrop trial. This story features Mark completely separate from SWB continuity.
by
Anonymous12/28/15
The past of lie is lay not lied unless you mean the opposite of telling the truth.
English
OMG Hot
That was so good... Took my breath.. shame its ended. couldnt there be more?
something else
Incredible story! I didn't even skim over any of it. So many stories are filled with endless minutia, it drives me crazy. This story was captivating from first word to last. Good ending!
beyond hot
quite an ending for a remarkable story... Dark yet not, Lots of passion and thought... thank you
OMG
That was great! No desire to get ready for work now.
damn that was hot
That was waaaaay hotter than I thought it would be. Thank you for encouraging me to look into it. Much love to ya babe!
more commas
Well done!
Wow
Well done, took my breath away.
No club
could be worth getting my ass raped dry and ripped apart and my shoulder muscles severely torn. Some of the stuff you describe in this story is physically dangerous--safe and sane, not so much. You're a dom in real life, right? Do you actually treat your subs this severely, and if so, do you drive them to the emergency room when they need medical care?
no club
Bondage as you describe is what causes individuals to have borderline personalities - cutting so that they know they are alive. This is definitely the last story I will read of this type. Someone told me that I had a submissive personality and maybe there are times that I do what my husband wants but I will never ,ever allow someone to treat me the way that these stories portray. I am not into pain and I think it is sad that this kind of behavior exists and that dominant people use abuse, sexual as well physical abuse to get their high. SAD SAD SAD, that some people are to hung up on themselves that to make themselves feel powerful, they can only do this by/ through pain of another. Pain does not beget pleasure, it only promote low self esteem for the submissive. Mutual adult game playing is between them. In your story, the submissive said her safe word twice and she wasn't released. So for all those individuals who choose to be a dominant, think twice if the roles were reversed, would they still be getting high as the new submissive.
I like...
it like this! Down and dirty, and straight to the action. Yes indeed -- you can make my day any time. Take care...
PS: This story is not about romance. Be warned or be entertained. But proceed to read with full knowledge.
Anonymous: "Bondage as you describe is what causes individuals to have borderline personalities... In your story, the submissive said her safe word twice and she wasn't released. So for all those individuals who choose to be a dominant, think twice if the roles were reversed, would they still be getting high as the new submissive."
I don't recall her ever saying the safe word. At least, not while conscious- she was dreaming when she said it the two times that you are referring to. If you're going to use something from the story in your argument, perhaps you should pay better attention to what you're reading.
...and a great finish! Thanks for the story.
In reality this was torture not true Master/slave. From what I read of BDSM it is supposed to be mutual. I would probably collapse and or pass out in this set up. With the abusive childhood I had and my inability to orgasm now Plus the dry mouth I get when masturbating I would be dehydrated. Plus the length of time the nipple clamps were on would probably cause nerve damage to my nipples. I usually like M/s D/s stories but this one led me to believe this was one sadistic man who is by no means a good Master. I don't think he would have stopped even if she had used the safe word. He was not even looking out for her health. He is the kind who would put her in the hospital almost dead and laugh. I gave the stars but I think it was still more about torture. Again since I don't orgasm easily and most times not at all I would find this not very enjoyable. I sure hope if it were true, Allison finds it was worth it. If you really liked it you must be sadistic as well. Not exactly what I see as true BDSM from what I have read about it. Course I still read it all. Had to find out the ending.
I would have liked a little more resolution.
Where does she go from here? Does she still play with her boys? Does the contract pan out? I'd like to see the changes in her life because I believe this would be a life changing experience.
Not being in that Life Style
I have a couple naive questions
1) Are YOU part of this life style, or is this just your twisted mind at work
2) After the psychic break she has just suffered, do you really think she will EVER be a Domme again? Really?
3) Unprepared dry anal penetration with a normal sized cock would result in tearing, and you have gone out of your way to describe him as much larger than average, and with absolutely NO preparation at all. So where is the accompanying tearing?
4) Where is the warning of severe pain and torture? That's what this is, after all, no matter how you dress it up
What a crock of crap
Just what anyone needs - to be tortured. And given the short period of time involved
there is simply no way he broke her spirit. Just an awful story of abuse and torture.
From a grateful slave
As a practicing bdsm slave I am glad to see you do it right. There are many levels of domination and you covered several of them as well as showing proper safety procedure. Mark reminds me much of my own master stern and unyeilding except he isn't such a dark bad boy. I would love to see more of Mark. Perhaps a series all his own. Either way thank you for your masterful imagery.
For anyone looking for more
This story is a condensed version that is part of a full length novel. For anyone looking for the full story behind this initiation and the "Circle" please contact me through my lit homepage and I can tell you how to find it.
Okay, I guess
The story was okay I guess, though I seriously doubt most dominants would agree to the deal. Most sexual dominants aren't emotionally strong people, thus the need to have someone submit to their desires. As for any other critiques...the physical results of unprepared anal sex, etc, those have already been covered. My personal biggest gripe was your continued use of the word "lied", when you meant "lay" or "laid".
Allison would not have "lied" there, she would have "lay" there. If you're going to be a writer, please work more diligently on proper grammar. Other than a few errors along those lines, the tale was mildly interesting as a clash of wills. I really don't get off on pain and torture as part of a sexual experience, so I can't say I found the story erotic, but undoubtedly some did and that's fine. Different strokes for different folks and all that.
Different from SWB
What happened in this story was supposed to be a 'fleshed out' version of the 5 minute highlight video of the 3 hour session Mark used in SWB, but the actions are different from the highlights given.
I enjoyed the story and the preceding one as well as the entire SWB series (Samhain was a particularly hot one lol) this just jumped out as significantly different.
Keep up the good work.
S
@anon 'different'
I believe you have this mixed up with a different girl. I think you are referring to "Ashley Winthrop" and what Mark did to her to get Alex off his back in the Winthrop trial. This story features Mark completely separate from SWB continuity.
The past of lie is lay not lied unless you mean the opposite of telling the truth.
Very good story. Great writing.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to The Breaking of Allison Ch. 02 or
More submissions by lovecraft68.