All Comments on '1st Time With Mother In Law Ch. 02'

Sounds very odd to me!!

way to fast. no time for the story to develop.

This is a comment about both chapters. I think that you were too quick to get to the sex and then you didn't take your time with the sex. You have the basis for a really good story but you need to take your time and make it much longer.

Didn't really like it-badly written and just not a turn on. You didn't describe how they look!

terrible work on it Honey.

it's very good and very exciting

maybe the mother in law shld have been treated like a slut.....that wld have been exciting....made he squirm & used her toungue as a brooom allover ur pussy

Too Abrupt : I agree that the story got to the erotic part far, far too quickly and treated the seduction in three or four sentances.

What is a good story has not been exploited

This story is so hot! I was fingering my self. It made me so horny,I started touching my sister (she's 17 and I'm 16) we started feeling each other and came.

This story was so hot & steaming keep doing what you doing madam!!

A little to quick for the whole thing to go straight to the sex for this one but the other one was fine

I couldn't stop fingering myself. i'm really wet, and can't wait to read more.

wells me and my sister both love ur story and one day when my mom left she said lets do what u guys did in the story and my hornyness came over me and we did it ..... now we do it a couple times when my moms away we also hump eachother its amazing

A great premise; however, it was too abbreviated. It is one story that could have been easily fleshed-out more; it could have gone deeper into a relationship between the two women. For what there was, it was all right.

The story was well written you just didn't put enough detail in the story you should have let the son find out what the mother and his wife was doing. He should have been very upset at his wife. More details Good Story not enough detail i hope there a chapter 3 I will read it.

I think it have more details in it. but it was good.

Reading this made me want someone to come and sit on my face... I was rubbing my clit the entire time, and came twice. So sexy, wish I could've joined.

I agree that the story didn't nearly have enough details. I was horny and decided to get off these stories usually do tne trick. This one would have been alot better if you slowed it down and expanded it with details. Still made me soaking wet though. :)

Part 2 was worse than part one which was pretty bad. This isn't your strong point.....I hope.

Poor On all fronts - Can Improve

The story is lacking in setting the General Picture, the Ambient Circumstances: There is Little or NO Lead-Up to the 'Sex' . The Basic Story Line could be used to give the readers a much more realistic and much more Interesting Story.

Suggestion: that you pull this one ( Both ) Out. and Re-write.

regar

Hearing this story makes me so horny, while im reading it i am rubbing my pussy

Is a veryy good story

you have a great mother-in Law. what more could a girl ask for.Yummy

This story has potential, but you don't build the attraction enough before getting to the sex. Your use of run-on sentences and poor grammar also detract from the story. Edit this. Take some time. Get someone to proofread and edit for clarity.

For your Fiance, this was some fucked up shit! He really loves you and he really loves your Mom and you 2 are having a secret affair. He is being betrayed by the 2 most important people in his life.

But, on the other hand, the situation is really great for you and your Mom in law, and its so sexy and erotic, making each other cum 10 times! Wow! You are not doing this to hurt your hubby, you 2 like each other and you are having great, amazing sex and just need to have more.

If I was your Fiance, I would bitch-slap you 2 Worthies all the way into next week and back, and then let my Mom have you but you gotta catch it on video and send me copies.

So, what happened in the end?

Reading this made me cum! Thank you!

I feel like the story could be really good...BUT I feel like you should have been more descriptive when you were writing the sex scene I really think the story has a lot of potential but you have to work on being more DESCRIPTIVE

Glad to see you and she developing intense intimacy!

Would love to see you explain more of your emotions and feelings, rather than just the lovemaking mechanics. What are her textures and scents? How does her body drive your anticipation and eagerness? What do you sense in your body as you spend time together?

Don't be afraid to literally "flesh out" your romance and sensuality, highlighting the seduction and eroticism, and vulnerability of the carnal taboo relationship.

LOVED this story, especially that they got together to suck each other's tits and pussies to begin to be lovers.💗

Cheaters. Two absolute bitches.

1/5

5 stars every time I read it.