All Comments on 'Bookstore Seduction'

he could see far enough up an ankle length skirt to realize you weren't wearing panties.

I had the same thought as aposiopesis. How does one look up a full length skirt to see there are no panties? It's inconsistencies like these that tend to make or break a good narrative. Perhaps some editing would be of help?

Perhaps you two didn't catch the fact that she is climbing a ladder. It's easy to see up a long skirt. Maybe you spend too much time in Borders and not enough time is good old bookstores.

It struck that he wouldn't see, but I don't think it was worth dwelling on. The premise was great - book store sex, particularly an old book store - maybe you could play up the conflicting scents of your, him, and books. I liked the concept of her having the longing for the regular customer and having it fulfilled.

I also liked the twist in how he left. Good idea - good irony. Now we all have to wonder what he will do the next time.

If I have any suggestions, it's that I felt overpowered by sentences starting with "I" one after the other. It's hard in this type of narrative to structure them otherwise, I know, but it might be something to keep in mind.

All in all, it flowed well, I only saw one typo and now I don't remember it, and it was a delightful fantasy. I'll be seeing some more of your work.

Ooh, one of my own fantasies! Nice! She wanted so badly to seduce him, but "He" one-upped her. I hope we get to see what else they have in "store" for each other! Yum! Yeah, I do believe if she was up the ladder and he was as close as he seemed to her, that he could see up the skirt, especially since the outfit is white and pretty transparent. :)

~Luna

Very good. I would love to read more of this story!

Very good. I found it quite arousing!

Public sex with the risk of being discovered at any minute has to be one of my favorites, and with the element of having that sex with a stranger, just wonderful...

Very hot...............

very hot

Definitely need to write the sequel of the man coming back for more. The offer from the owner to the clerk would make for another fun chapter. Possible plot twists regarding the identity of the man. Maybe getting caught and possible consequences.

My only criticisms would be that the teasing between the clerk and the man could have been lengthened to build up more tension. I also agree with the other posters regarding the length of the dress, but it seemed more of an issue to me when he ran his hand up her thigh and then under her skirt.

But that isn't to say I didn't like the story. On the contrary, I thought it was quite a fun little story and I definitely enjoyed it. Now, get to work on the sequels. Please! :)

a nice narrative. you're a good writer. i couldn't help wondering though ... where in the store were they when they finally "came together"? i couldn't quite picture the specific location. but a really warm and engaging story.

And why haven't I visited it? It combines two of my favorite activities: browsing books and having sex. I was distracted by a lack of door locks to keep their tryst private. The thrill of possible discovery is exciting but they might have frightened some children visiting the shop. No, wait, kids don't read books nowadays. Never mind!

I really enjoyed reading this story... and want more. Hoping for a sequel, however just leads my imagination to weave it's own "what happens next". Can't wait to read more from you.

... which book to select is the tantalizing question every time I visit one.

In this story a lot more is on the minds of the two characters who meet in a bookstore though.

Very well written, alluring and seducing, even if some minor 'mistakes' haven't been edited. They didn't diminish my reading pleasure, only had me wondering a moment if maybe I was remembering it wrongly. Once I checked, and satisfied my brain wasn't playing a trick, I continued, engulfed in the adventures of the two.

One hot sexy encounter!

I loved it ... Good pace and well written. A nice, short read! Thanks.

Bookstores are inherently stimulating where you seek a story to immerse yourself in a fantasy world. That is one step from our everyday sexual fantasies and longings. This story has an enticing plot of fulfilling a physical longing in an enveloping but risky public spot. Well-written and, like good sex, builds to a satisfying climax while simultaneously leaving the reader wanting more.

I liked the build-up, the fact that neither spoke, the abrupt ending leaving him unfufilled. Nice that it left the reader with the question: why did he leave so quickly. Was he afraid of what might happen if he stayed? Did he suddenly remember another appointment? Did he suddenly come to his senses? The perfect ending for a sequel or two.

Him getting into a pickup truck did not work for me even though I drive one. I had him pegged as a bookish type, maybe a college prof. I expected him to be dressed conservatively, maybe wearing a sports jacket and driving an Austin Healy with the top down.

I also wondered about the long dress. A shorter skirt would have given better views as she climbed the ladder. As it was, I was wondering how he could see anything under that long skirt, even if he was climbing the latter directly below her. Also, what would bending over in that dress show but the shape of her butt.

I liked that she went bra-less and ditched the wet thongs. I half-expected him to see her stash them. Maybe take them with him. Nothing like panties saturated with a woman's juices.

Still, a good story. I liked it a lot. Nice short read. Had to favorite it. Hope you write that sequel, or two.