Treason Ch. 02

What I like about this ...

The tenderness. This is smart and sexy and the dynamic between the two draws me in.

Your story has captivated me and I can't wait to see where it goes.

What I am not a fan of... pain. Will never understand either the giving or receiving and how that is construed as erotic. But, to each his own.

great story! I hope you have a plan for your characters I'd like to see where they go from here.

Will you ever add to your story--you write well?

Wait where's the rest?? That was so good I want more!

Marvelous!!!!

Please may I have some more? As soon as possible.........

good; wish you'd finished it

The prince's comment about the safe word jarred me out of the story; it's a pretty modern concept and felt anachronistic. It's hard to do dual POV well. I'd rather have stayed wholly in Marja's head, as in chapter 1. But those are nitpicks. It's rare to find a good serial on Literotica; this is one of them. Hope you come back to it someday.

Amazing ^_^

Come back

I know it's been a while since you posted this, which generally indicates you've either completed this story or abandoned it, but I really want you to come back and write some more.

I love the way you write. I love the way you narrate this story, giving enough details on setting and clothing and world building but not getting too bogged down so we don't have to understand the mechanisms on how the light switches work.

Marja deserves to have more of her story told. Jonathan needs to have more of his story told. Please come back and tell us more about what happened to Marja and Jonathan?