I like how everything is meshing together. I can't wait for the next chapter.
by
Anonymous09/20/10
Enjoyed the exploration of relationships
Jerry in Washington State, USA - I enjoyed this chapter mainly for showing Mike's relationships with his sisters and how those relationships are slowly changing and becoming more sexually charged. I look forward to the next chapter to see what Sarah has planned as she probably follows him into his room.
I'm getting more and more feedback from people about the names that Mike gets called. As a man with several sisters myself, I was never called by my real name. It was always bro, or sweetie, or an insult if we weren't getting along. Sarah calls everyone sweetie. It's just her thing, and yes, it's intentional.
by
Anonymous09/20/10
So quick
I'm really impressed at how quickly you're posting these stories and how well written they are, I can't wait to read more.
OMG, I stumbled upon these storys the other day and now I can't wait to see how it progresses further. Absolutely perfect. The progression and character development is so well fined that it's like your in the story with them. I am seriously looking forward to the next one. Please keep up the great work.
I'm honestly very surprised, and very humbled by the response to my story. As long as I have fans, i'll keep writing. Thank you all so much for all the positive response. You readers are the reason I write, so please continue giving me feedback, both positive and negative. It will only strengthen my writing and my resolve to give you guys the best.
by
Anonymous09/21/10
Nice
I am able to easily picture these situations which is fantastic! Thanks!
by
Anonymous11/18/10
Thank you for not writing a porn movie!
You really do seem to get what erotic storytelling is. The plot and characters are believable, real and engaging. The erotic scenes are very steamy. The pacing has been excellent. Please keep writing!
You have a gift this is a wonderful story And we are slowly getting to know the people within it. Keep up the great work
by
Anonymous04/09/11
Feels like he's batman
As this story goes on I keep feeling like you used batman as a character model. The repetitive use of the words guardian and protector definitely added to that. Not a bad thing, just something I can't get out of my mind.
The characters are so natural and real. The interactions between characters seem very fluid and natural. It still seems like a true story or based on actual events.
A couple of spelling and grammer mistakes. They are minor so just keep a careful eye out for them.
by
Anonymous08/08/11
Blatant logical absurdities shatter the Suspension Of Disbelief
So soon after you wrote that his ribs hurt too much to move quickly you have him and Emma engage in a rough tickle fight.
Dear Anon hater who posted the suspension of disbelief comment......
Have you heard of the affects of adrenalin? Did you know that adrenalin, when properly administered by the brain, can numb pain? Did you also know that the human mind can subconsciously choose NOT to feel pain for a brief period, especially with a serious injury? (Admittedly, usually after some severe forms of training and exercise!)..... Well, did you?
Just sayin' dude..... Check your comments before you post them. Hate like this and the unjustified nature of posting it anonymously is a cop out. People like you don't deserve to be able to post at all.
by
Anonymous12/05/11
Re: Suspension of Believe & Reply to it......
I never read anything to suggest a serious injury......otherwise he would have been hospitalized. Nothing in the story suspended belief for me, it actually was very realistic.......he is sore after a fight & more than a day has gone by. So he is sore but perfectly functioning. I love this story for the very relatible & lifelike characters!
Okay, so maybe you're sort of breaking my willing suspension of disbelief here for making Mike to be able to wrestle his sister ONE day after his injury, but other than that, a very enjoyable reading experience. :D
What kind of fruitcake says that stuff anyways? Great story, ignore that guy.
by
Anonymous03/14/13
Olympian?
You must be a god of some sort to produce awesme story after awesome fucking story. Kee up the briliant work
by
Anonymous03/15/13
Quality
Great stuff, keep it up.
by
Anonymous07/06/13
Funny Romantic and Erotic
Ah you my friend are an amazing writer. You have enough talent to not have this story just be about sex. You can sprinkle in humor and romance and badassery at all the right times. That whole thing when Beth said she wished she didn't have her breasts and the voice said Blasphemy! That made me chuckle. Keep it up!
by
Anonymous03/22/14
"I had to get erect and ruin it"? What a whiny pussy! Lol. He's like the whimp main character 13 year old boys in so many of those japanese mangas sometimes, lol!
by
Anonymous03/30/14
I feel sooo sorry
For those of you that were unlucky enough to growup without a sister or sisters
by
Anonymous07/23/14
it is wonderful to see how sisters really feel about their brothers that is3 only one more ,I wonder if the younger sisters will catch oldest sister with brother
I have read chapters 1-7, and have thoroughly enjoyed the story you have going. All growing boys and young men should be so lucky as to have an older sexy sister to help out with our sexual needs, whether sucking our cocks, letting us fuck them, or just teaching us how to please a woman while they are pleasing us. Keep it up!
When he was wrestling emily, he had her ass in his fucking face, so goddammed awesome, and when he was on top.of her, his dick was pressing into her ass! DUYAMMM! I wish I had 4 hot sisters with one is my twin and has a nice ass and did that to me, that ass is awesome then the fukken voice is so hilarious this chapter, keep writing, this series is amazing and nicely written
English
Amazing storyline
Awesome mix of fun and sex. Cant wait for more chapters. Love the build-up
keep going
I wish I didn't have to wait an entire day to read the next chapter.
Great Work
Love the story. Nice plot and originality, love the voice.
Great storyline.
I like how everything is meshing together. I can't wait for the next chapter.
Enjoyed the exploration of relationships
Jerry in Washington State, USA - I enjoyed this chapter mainly for showing Mike's relationships with his sisters and how those relationships are slowly changing and becoming more sexually charged. I look forward to the next chapter to see what Sarah has planned as she probably follows him into his room.
Names
I'm getting more and more feedback from people about the names that Mike gets called. As a man with several sisters myself, I was never called by my real name. It was always bro, or sweetie, or an insult if we weren't getting along. Sarah calls everyone sweetie. It's just her thing, and yes, it's intentional.
So quick
I'm really impressed at how quickly you're posting these stories and how well written they are, I can't wait to read more.
EXCELLENT !
OMG, I stumbled upon these storys the other day and now I can't wait to see how it progresses further. Absolutely perfect. The progression and character development is so well fined that it's like your in the story with them. I am seriously looking forward to the next one. Please keep up the great work.
Out of this world
I have been reading your stories and I got to say each one is getting better and better it's just out of this world keep up the excellent work
Wow
I'm honestly very surprised, and very humbled by the response to my story. As long as I have fans, i'll keep writing. Thank you all so much for all the positive response. You readers are the reason I write, so please continue giving me feedback, both positive and negative. It will only strengthen my writing and my resolve to give you guys the best.
Nice
I am able to easily picture these situations which is fantastic! Thanks!
Thank you for not writing a porn movie!
You really do seem to get what erotic storytelling is. The plot and characters are believable, real and engaging. The erotic scenes are very steamy. The pacing has been excellent. Please keep writing!
Excellent pacing, loving it.
Like mentioned before, you have a gift describing erotic situations.
Love it!
The voice in his head FTW!!!
Wonderful
You have a gift this is a wonderful story And we are slowly getting to know the people within it. Keep up the great work
Feels like he's batman
As this story goes on I keep feeling like you used batman as a character model. The repetitive use of the words guardian and protector definitely added to that. Not a bad thing, just something I can't get out of my mind.
Again, impressive
The characters are so natural and real. The interactions between characters seem very fluid and natural. It still seems like a true story or based on actual events.
A couple of spelling and grammer mistakes. They are minor so just keep a careful eye out for them.
Blatant logical absurdities shatter the Suspension Of Disbelief
So soon after you wrote that his ribs hurt too much to move quickly you have him and Emma engage in a rough tickle fight.
Dear Anon hater who posted the suspension of disbelief comment......
Have you heard of the affects of adrenalin? Did you know that adrenalin, when properly administered by the brain, can numb pain? Did you also know that the human mind can subconsciously choose NOT to feel pain for a brief period, especially with a serious injury? (Admittedly, usually after some severe forms of training and exercise!)..... Well, did you?
Just sayin' dude..... Check your comments before you post them. Hate like this and the unjustified nature of posting it anonymously is a cop out. People like you don't deserve to be able to post at all.
Re: Suspension of Believe & Reply to it......
I never read anything to suggest a serious injury......otherwise he would have been hospitalized. Nothing in the story suspended belief for me, it actually was very realistic.......he is sore after a fight & more than a day has gone by. So he is sore but perfectly functioning. I love this story for the very relatible & lifelike characters!
Very enjoyable so far
Okay, so maybe you're sort of breaking my willing suspension of disbelief here for making Mike to be able to wrestle his sister ONE day after his injury, but other than that, a very enjoyable reading experience. :D
Suspension of Disbelief?
What kind of fruitcake says that stuff anyways? Great story, ignore that guy.
Olympian?
You must be a god of some sort to produce awesme story after awesome fucking story. Kee up the briliant work
Quality
Great stuff, keep it up.
Funny Romantic and Erotic
Ah you my friend are an amazing writer. You have enough talent to not have this story just be about sex. You can sprinkle in humor and romance and badassery at all the right times. That whole thing when Beth said she wished she didn't have her breasts and the voice said Blasphemy! That made me chuckle. Keep it up!
"I had to get erect and ruin it"? What a whiny pussy! Lol. He's like the whimp main character 13 year old boys in so many of those japanese mangas sometimes, lol!
I feel sooo sorry
For those of you that were unlucky enough to growup without a sister or sisters
it is wonderful to see how sisters really feel about their brothers that is3 only one more ,I wonder if the younger sisters will catch oldest sister with brother
Blasphemy!!
the. best. response. ever.
The Voice
I just read it because of him
great story you have going
I have read chapters 1-7, and have thoroughly enjoyed the story you have going. All growing boys and young men should be so lucky as to have an older sexy sister to help out with our sexual needs, whether sucking our cocks, letting us fuck them, or just teaching us how to please a woman while they are pleasing us. Keep it up!
Flip
Wish I had 4 hot sisters to fuck.
Dat ass doe
When he was wrestling emily, he had her ass in his fucking face, so goddammed awesome, and when he was on top.of her, his dick was pressing into her ass! DUYAMMM! I wish I had 4 hot sisters with one is my twin and has a nice ass and did that to me, that ass is awesome then the fukken voice is so hilarious this chapter, keep writing, this series is amazing and nicely written
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