In a good story someone like carla needs to have a bad thing happen to her so that they pay for the bad they did. She lied to him, broke her vows. To be complete you need to have things end badly for her.
At least he doesn't sound so bitter and detached in this story. The relationship is more enjoyable to Paula and him, and it shows in the tone of the story and their interactions. The sex scenes are plain narration and would benefit from more dialogue and intimate description. Not riveting, but it's a decent story.
English
Carla didn't get wht was coming to her
In a good story someone like carla needs to have a bad thing happen to her so that they pay for the bad they did. She lied to him, broke her vows. To be complete you need to have things end badly for her.
Ah, now this is better.
At least he doesn't sound so bitter and detached in this story. The relationship is more enjoyable to Paula and him, and it shows in the tone of the story and their interactions. The sex scenes are plain narration and would benefit from more dialogue and intimate description. Not riveting, but it's a decent story.
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