Burning Rose

interesting start

This was a nice start to a story but it could use a bit of polish. There where a few grammar issue i found but over all not bad. The little thing I found could be ironed out with a good editor. Thank you for sharing and hope to read more

It was a good start. I think it would only be a start though as the ending was where the story was just getting started. We knew from the start his goal of taking her to this place was to bond with her so in the end when she begins to realize he did it...I wanted to see her reaction, how would it affect their relationship? How do you give yourself completely to someone who in a way violated you? I also wanted to know at the start more about who they are. Is he royalty? They mention a palace and yet they also mention him being her mentor for magical training so what is their relationship?
This could develop into an interesting story. It would belong in BDSM partially too. It would be an interesting struggle between them b/c she is not submissive yet he wants to force her to be. I hope you will choose to continue the story.