Girlfriend Meets His Roommates

Blak room mate Takes White Girlfriend?

You scum sucking black worshipping asshole. Your fantasy only demonstrates what a grotesque moronic worm that you are.
What sane white male would be room mates with a bunch of (always psychopathic) nigger racists? A cretin who would put up with their afro-supremacy remarks and obscenely racist antics daily has to be a wigger.
Then allowing them to despoil the white girl friend is the height of cowardice. But this is what literotica is promoting and PIMPING, violent african rape of white women. Damn you all to hell . Know the hatred that is boiling over against you. Revenge is coming you animalistic sub human trash!
I am going to publicize this racist shit house all over the internet.

What crap

I agree with the first comment. Firstly the story is badly racist, it is also badly written in the third person and then including quotes! We go from 'boyfriend' to 'bf' and back. Maybe it should be under sci fi because it wouldn't happen in this world.

How much more fucking RACIST could you be?

I did not read much of this story I couldn't it made me sick to think anyone could dream of such fucked up disgusting shit. There are sites that cater to fucked up people like you this site does not, at least not yet. Fuck off and die writer. And take your RACIST shit with you.

To the first commenter(probably that turd mongo)

oooooh aren't you scary? Now jog on dickhead.

Your story

I find it interesting that your story is provoking such angry comments! After all, this is a place to share one's fantasies and no there is no requirement we have to get turned on by the same thing. I don't think you deserve the nasty remarks.

As far as your story goes, there is certainly a racist aspect to it. However, I am sure many people (of all races) enjoy the taboo stuff and rough talk. I do think you should consider re-writing your story and using names instead of girl friend, gf, room mate, etc. It would make the story much more immediate and exciting.

a person can only hope

a person can only hope that maybe this author will get run over by a truck.

I hope you have told your friends and family about this story?

Let them know what sort of nightmares you have. I also hope that you never get married or have a boyfriend. If you ever have boyfriend, at least a white one, although that is very unlikely. You love black people better than white people so you will have or have had any number of black boyfriends.

But if you go against type and find a white boyfriend then be sure to tell him about this nightmare/fantasy you have just to warn him.

Rather sterile

Written as if you're describing the script of a movie or play without any connection with the action you're describing. I suggest you try writing stories from within the action rather from the outside looking in.

not sure

not on the believable list for sure , always hot to get black cock
but this way not hardly, i was 40yr before i tried black cock and it took me 6 months of chatting with him before i had the desire and courage to try it, of course now i do love it and do not want to give it up, but gf visiting her boy fr at that age and not already a wild whore to just look at a bbc and have to have it with no drugs or drinkin to cloud her mind not hardly

if you won't take the time...

to spell out 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend' I won't take the time to read your piss-poor effort - get a decent editor

Honestly - who are the real racists

I can't believe the psychotic ranting from people who clicked on this story, chose to read it, and read enough of it to comment on it. People need to take a pill and stop bashing other people's fantasies. Literotica caters to all types of people and all types of fetishes. The angry racists, who are undoubtedly closet cuckold fetishists, need to get serious help.

To the author: a poorly written story with a very hot theme. Too bad it was not written better. Perhaps I will use your framework for a story of my own.

Peace.

Good. Some Positive Input

This story was actually quite good but good be better:

1. Spell/grammar check.
2. Actually give your characters some names and some depth. Like how do they feel about what's going on. Why are they doing it. Then run with it. It makes them feel more real then just a read.
3. Draw out your plots and scenes longer. You have them but don't grasp or present them fully. If you did could be much better.

Hope this helps.

1 star.

....

Poor effort overall

Pushes the line between fantasy and outrageous. No sane man - black, white or otherwise - is going to barge in and interrupt two people having sex and just take over. Horrendously written, not to mention racist as hell.

the diff

the diff is i have a gun and a ccw he wud have been shot in the fucking dick the molment he walked in and she dumped for fuking looking lol

and im white with a ten inch cock

isn't that rape? the guy should quickly become an 'ex' bf and find a bew place to live

Well...

I really liked your newest story so I read this one too. Not a bad premise but WAY too many N words. As a black man, any reference to my "nigger dick" would bring the action to a screeching halt. It's your fantasy, write it how you want but I thought you should know that.
BTW your profile pic is amazing!

Lots of potential

Being written in the third person makes it hard to feel immersed in this fantasy. Any chance of a rewrite?

my wife

this sounds just like how my wife got us both into the service of blacks. she had to try it and the black guy thought I needed to try it too.so he fucked both of us and now we are hooked on it.

Sentence structure of a 1st grader

Sentence structure of a 1st grader

Fuck what anyone says

Awesome story. I want my pawg girlfriend to this to me too.

Not sure what to call this comment

Good story, but I felt the author could have taken what happened over the weekend further.