A Vampire's Life Ch. 01

brilliant!

please add more this was great!!

Getting quite interesting!

Engaging story, thank you!

But please fix those plural words -- the apostrophe is for possessive nouns, not for plural words.

And good luck!

Interesesting, but...

...you need to either get an editor or learn where to use apostrophes and be a bit more careful with your proofreading. You used apostrophe ess ('s) 84 times, and only 12 of those were correct, mostly on things like "it's" or "he's"...the bulk of the rest of them shouldn't be there. There are several other places where you're using entirely the wrong word. It's taking away from the story that you're trying to tell, which could be a good one. Looking forward to the next chapter.

Please continue with this story. I would like to see what happens now.