homeNon-Erotic PoetryIn SpainPublic Comments

All Comments  for

In Spain

byfridayam©
All
Comments (3)
by Anonymous

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by GuiltyPleasure12/22/10

memories....

This is a sweet snapshot of a child's delight, very visually evocotive. My only gripe is the use of "pint-sized" which seemed out of place somehow. I particularly like the finishing lines.

Tess

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by vrosej1012/23/10

Love this, very cute.

I think this is great but the reason that pint-sized sticks out, is because it is a cliche in an otherwise solid poem. You are a better writer than that. I do love this though.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by twelveoone12/24/10

*

there is something I don't like about the last line - it seems too pat.
L1 - ending at "the".
I know, I know - niggling SOB; but you got a 100

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.

Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!  or
Back to In Spain  or
More submissions by fridayam.

Add a
Comment

Post a public comment on this submission.

Post comment as (click to select):

Preview comment

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar:

   Cancel