All Comments on 'How Kelly Figured It Out'

by grrlongrrrl

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  • 5 Comments
Janice1939Janice1939about 13 years ago
So real

When our parents are there helping us in who we are its normal. When they are not it hurts, to find out with what felt as a rejection that one is gay does hurt. Even when a teacher was there in the end it must feel weird when it could have all be so naturally beautiful. Being gay is often more normal than those who claim to be straight,

Very well written keep it coming L.O.L. Janice

estragonestragonabout 13 years ago
It's a Good Story

but why is every third word "shit" or"fuck"? It's unnecessary, and makes your character tawdry and cheap. I have no problem with such language, but if you use it in a story it has to have a place. Every word you write must move the story, and to finish a sentence with "and that shit", or words to that effect, moves nothing. JD Salinger used "all that David Copperfield crap" just once in Catcher, but I'll always remember it. If he used it every second word, who would care?

AnonymousAnonymousabout 13 years ago
Language annoying

Estragon has a good point. The excessive use of "shit" and "fuck" should have some literary point. Vulgarity should not be confused with erotica. It distracted from had real promise.

FirebrainFirebrainabout 13 years ago
Girls swear too, y'know

You want to hang around a high-school during lunch time; everyone's swearing, girls and boys. It sounds vulgar to some ears but it's certainly realistic.

I enjoyed the story. I relate in some ways, too. I hope Miss Lorenzo doesn't get sacked...

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 12 years ago
Good job

I liked it and didn't mind your cursing at all, I think it helped me to know you better and so I feel more connected to your story. :)

Anonymous
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