Another great part. Keep the story's cumming!!!
I'm no grammar expert, but, you have like, way too many commas, and run on sentences, instead of having each point, be one sentence, so I had to stop reading, even though the subject material, seemed kind of hot, but it was just, you know, annoying.
You got a good basis for what you write, but the grammar is really letting you down. Do something about that, and these will be so much better.
this site is literotica, not english 101, you people want to grade papers go to school and become a teacher. sheeeeesh
This appears to have some potential. Perhaps one or two more about how the relationship grows between Mother and now son-in-law.
Someone complained, and said "grammer". The word is "grammar". Get an editor, since you don't qualify as one.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! orBack to Girlfriend's Mother Ch. 01 orMore submissions by qualitywheat.
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English
Great
Another great part. Keep the story's cumming!!!
Unreadable
I'm no grammar expert, but, you have like, way too many commas, and run on sentences, instead of having each point, be one sentence, so I had to stop reading, even though the subject material, seemed kind of hot, but it was just, you know, annoying.
Ok though I think am editor is a good idea
You got a good basis for what you write, but the grammar is really letting you down.
Do something about that, and these will be so much better.
grammer?
this site is literotica, not english 101, you people want to grade papers go to school and become a teacher. sheeeeesh
Potential
This appears to have some potential. Perhaps one or two more about how the relationship grows between Mother and now son-in-law.
Grammer?
Someone complained, and said "grammer". The word is "grammar". Get an editor, since you don't qualify as one.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Girlfriend's Mother Ch. 01 or
More submissions by qualitywheat.