homeErotic PoetryShield of BronzePublic Comments

All Comments  for

Shield of Bronze

bybronzeage©
All
Comments (3)
by Anonymous

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by twelveoone03/02/11

*

I like this, you are getting good at walking that fine line, ( of what good poets can get away with) except here:
yelping dogs too small to note.
cliche and not logical to boot.
worthy of a five, I thought so

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by butters03/02/11

holding out for a hero...

i buy into this. yes please. love this, especially its second half:

If you are to suffer for mercy's sake
cling to my chest. I hold my shield skyward.
Imagine the drum of arrows on bronze,
the marching cadence of my beating heart.

but agree with the overworking of the little dogs analogy. also suggest a semi after 'Let arrows pepper my shield,' rather than the comma used.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by UnderYourSpell03/02/11

~

sigh ...... my Hero! I quite like the dogs but then I'm all for terriers!

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.

Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!  or
Back to Shield of Bronze  or
More submissions by bronzeage.

Add a
Comment

Post a public comment on this submission (click here to send private anonymous feedback to the author instead).

Post comment as (click to select):

You may also listen to a recording of the characters.

Preview comment

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar:

   Cancel