The man's point of view in the audio is plausible, but the woman's point of view is both unrealistic and, because of the falsetto, humorous. There needs to be a paragraph or two explaining HOW she changes her attitude; as it is, it's too abrupt.
by
Anonymous03/08/11
Not interested:
in listening. Wheres the text.
by
Anonymous03/08/11
Too Much
I gave you a ONE, only because it was the lowest.
NO, I didn't listen to the text, didn't find the written one? Maybe, you should just try and write your own stuff, I loathe plagiarism.
I think JPB did just fine, good ending so I would say to you...Fuck You!
And in this place it is hard to get anyone to agree on anything. But we do this time. This sucked. Unlike the others I chose not to vote because there wasn't a scored low enough.
by
Anonymous03/08/11
I'd give it 5 stars
If only for the first rate audio quality. Most of the audio stuff is hardly worth trying to listen to. Sounds like they were recorded on a 1950 model wire recorder--a second one besides.
by
Anonymous03/08/11
dont waste my time
unbelievable that such poor quality garbage is accepted to be posted
This one definitely went up in a cloud of smoke. From one who has been there and done that...welcome to the boat of JPB disasters, now row harder ya bastard!
I gave you five for the originality of using audio, then took one away for the crappy sound...what sort of sound booth did you use to record it, the inside of a beer can? I took another one away for not using a proper female voice in the recording, I almost fell off my chair laughing when I heard her lines.
Then there was two taken off for the absolutely unbelievable dialogue. When reading a story the reader has the ability to put his/her own intensity into a piece of dialogue, everyone sees it differently, but with audio we’re not given a choice as to how much passion or anger to put into what’s being said.
Nice try, but I think this failed on so many levels.
Writing stories is hard enough; script writing is so much harder. It’s why script writers don’t direct or produce or act in general and leave that to others who know better.
Don’t take it too hard, it’s all a learning curve. I suggest you start learning crawl before you take on the next marathon.
Amanda
by
Anonymous03/09/11
plagerism
unless you got written permission from bob you can not continue his story delete this at once
You missed the whole point of his acceptance of the situation, He loved his mother-in-law, he would not do anything to damage that relationship. He's with sarah because that is what Vangie wanted.
by
Anonymous03/25/11
oh dear
flat, uninspired delivery that sounds like a primary school student reading out a piece of text that they don't understand, awful acting ('oh nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!'), dripping with misogyny, and the choice to distort the voice, resulting in what sounds like an exchange between a redneck Dalek and a cartoon mouse?
A less than inspired effort.
English
Where's the text?
Where's the text?
REALLY need the text! Or a real female voice....
The man's point of view in the audio is plausible, but the woman's point of view is both unrealistic and, because of the falsetto, humorous. There needs to be a paragraph or two explaining HOW she changes her attitude; as it is, it's too abrupt.
Not interested:
in listening. Wheres the text.
Too Much
I gave you a ONE, only because it was the lowest.
NO, I didn't listen to the text, didn't find the written one? Maybe, you should just try and write your own stuff, I loathe plagiarism.
I think JPB did just fine, good ending so I would say to you...Fuck You!
No text, no listen.
Just crap. Gave 1 star because no zero stars.
We all agree
And in this place it is hard to get anyone to agree on anything. But we do this time. This sucked. Unlike the others I chose not to vote because there wasn't a scored low enough.
I'd give it 5 stars
If only for the first rate audio quality. Most of the audio stuff is hardly worth trying to listen to. Sounds like they were recorded on a 1950 model wire recorder--a second one besides.
dont waste my time
unbelievable that such poor quality garbage is accepted to be posted
Kah_Boom is right!
This one definitely went up in a cloud of smoke. From one who has been there and done that...welcome to the boat of JPB disasters, now row harder ya bastard!
I gave you five for the originality of using audio, then took one away for the crappy sound...what sort of sound booth did you use to record it, the inside of a beer can? I took another one away for not using a proper female voice in the recording, I almost fell off my chair laughing when I heard her lines.
Then there was two taken off for the absolutely unbelievable dialogue. When reading a story the reader has the ability to put his/her own intensity into a piece of dialogue, everyone sees it differently, but with audio we’re not given a choice as to how much passion or anger to put into what’s being said.
Nice try, but I think this failed on so many levels.
Writing stories is hard enough; script writing is so much harder. It’s why script writers don’t direct or produce or act in general and leave that to others who know better.
Don’t take it too hard, it’s all a learning curve. I suggest you start learning crawl before you take on the next marathon.
Amanda
plagerism
unless you got written permission from bob you can not continue his story delete this at once
Very poor attempt
You missed the whole point of his acceptance of the situation, He loved his mother-in-law, he would not do anything to damage that relationship. He's with sarah because that is what Vangie wanted.
oh dear
flat, uninspired delivery that sounds like a primary school student reading out a piece of text that they don't understand, awful acting ('oh nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!'), dripping with misogyny, and the choice to distort the voice, resulting in what sounds like an exchange between a redneck Dalek and a cartoon mouse?
A less than inspired effort.
Nice, but...
I'd rather have it in written form.
wow....
...are we expected to get off on the sound of your voice like that???! :s awful.
Just a plain crummy audio file.
Not a great add on to the story either.
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