Unpretentious and effective.
Hard to take seriously because the rhyme makes it come over flippant. Rhyming poetry has a place; it's not next to serious content. This is not a personal attack, I just thing your energies could be better directed.
Check green's poem above you and reread yours; you'll get what I mean.
5 but I question the title, my reading of this is it is supposed to be flip, esp the toss away lines at the end.
missus roses poems that r so cryptic they r not even understandable at least your poem makes sense.
that exists because of your chosen boppy kind of beat... i can imagine someone doin' their walk down the street to this rhythm.
as for the poem, well, i think it has more depth than first appears. it grows on me the more i read it.
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