homeNon-Erotic PoetryGreen ManPublic Comments

All Comments  for

Green Man

byMikeIvy©
All
Comments (2)
by Anonymous

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by twelveoone03/20/11

*

not bad, but not quite original

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by butters03/20/11

ok, it may not be original

theme-wise, but it's delving a little deeper than plenty written on the topic manage... what i think you create here, MI, is a sort of pastoral, clean, springlike feel with your write. it leaves me with a scent of fresh air in my nose, looking for rabbits...

i prefer the second half, and particularly those last two lines.
you've a missing apostrophe in winters if you meant it as a singular winter you refer to (as i'm thinking you did); a plural would require a comma after 'winters'. i don't feel you need as much punctuation as you've used, but that's definitely a personal taste thing. keep writing, MI - you are growing with each piece!

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.

Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!  or
Back to Green Man  or
More submissions by MikeIvy.

Add a
Comment

Post a public comment on this submission (click here to send private anonymous feedback to the author instead).

Post comment as (click to select):

You may also listen to a recording of the characters.

Preview comment

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar:

   Cancel