Take your characters' time, introduce a little uncertainty. Just as faith requires doubt, so does success require the possibility of failure.
by
Anonymous04/04/11
Get a new editor!
It was clear to me, after the first two screens, that you must be far below the age restrictions for this type of literature. Your knowledge of the English language, and it's obviously shared by your editor, is equivalent to that of 4th or 5th grade (elementary) level.
Not the best but far from the worst story I have read here. I hope that For the First Time is not the last time you submit your work to Literotica. Like anything else, success requires practice and listening to advice from knowledgeable mentors. It also requires a thick skin when encountering worthless comments from anonymous jerks. "Slowly, slowly" was not bad advice. Take time to get to know your characters and to listen to what they are saying.
English
Slowly, slowly
Take your characters' time, introduce a little uncertainty. Just as faith requires doubt, so does success require the possibility of failure.
Get a new editor!
It was clear to me, after the first two screens, that you must be far below the age restrictions for this type of literature. Your knowledge of the English language, and it's obviously shared by your editor, is equivalent to that of 4th or 5th grade (elementary) level.
has promise
but you definitely need a better editor!
Keep writing . .
Not the best but far from the worst story I have read here. I hope that For the First Time is not the last time you submit your work to Literotica. Like anything else, success requires practice and listening to advice from knowledgeable mentors. It also requires a thick skin when encountering worthless comments from anonymous jerks. "Slowly, slowly" was not bad advice. Take time to get to know your characters and to listen to what they are saying.
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