All Comments on 'The Seduction of Alex Ch. 02'

this just turned a good story into trash it is never good to add outsiders to incest. why would you add to this story after so many years and to do it like this is stupid it belongs in the nonerotic or group area. total waste of time please delete it and never post again

DBRS

It takes a lot of balls for an individual to trash a story then not leave a name. What is the matter, no guts to face someone. Or maybe it's because you have no talent yourself and have to put others down to make themselves feel better. BTW Jake was introduced in the first story and i did explain that he was searching for them for years but thanks for the comment.

Ah, did someone's little feelings get hurt because people didn't fall over praising your opus? Trashing people because the post anonymous shows how superficial you are. It doesn't change the fact you posted a shitty story. Furthermore, your inane comment showed you don't deserve the right of responding.

no my feelings were not hurt because everyone is entitled to their own opinion and i realize that I can not please every reader. I am sorry that you did not like my story. And i do realize that it's everyone's choice to put a comment anonymously but I feel its a way a person can hide and not face the person they are saying something negitive about. This is my opionion which I am entitled to as well. Thanks for your comment. I hope you find some stories that you do like

And thanks for being so judgemental. I did not realize that we met eachother and you knew me well enough to call me superficial. And I may not know you either but I did not make my comments personal until you did. I like people who speak their mind just like I was doing. I just wish the comments were more constructive critism then mean.

Let's play nice.

The writing is good, the subject matter is far from my "cup of tea".

Sexy, what I do is look to see if there is a biography, if there is none I consider rude remarks to be just that.

If there is a biography, I look to see if they have published a story for me to read, if there is not I just consider them rude.

If they have written a story, or more than one, I read what they have written.

First reason is to see if they are indeed a superior writer, to anyone.

Second reason is to find out if they have an idea that I can use to make a good story.

You never know where you will find an inspiration. I got one tonite when some spam showed up on my computer, you will see the story in about 3 days along with another that I modified from a conversation with a NPS ranger.

Keep on trying to improve your work, just remember "You can't please everyone, so you gotta please yourself." As quoted from Rick Nelson

Sorry, but this part ruined the mood in your story for me. You had a good love story in the first part that easily could stand on it's own without adding more to it. I can't see how changing it from a loving couple to group sex and swingers could do the story any good, to me it has the opposite effect. A couple that includes others is clearly not satisfied with their relationship, and the sex seems to be casual instead of an expression of feelings. This places doubt about their true feelings towards each other. By this change in course the two parts as a sequel seems odd and out of places because of the difference in the setting. By the first part, you lead the readers on by laying the storyline as a classic love story. Here it is a complete change in another direction.

as pissed as he was when jake kissed her in chapter one there is no way in hell they would ever allow anyone to join them. thanks for ruining what WAS a good story.

This was a wonderful addition to the story line ... I'm off to read ch 3, now....

:)

you took a good story and had to turn into trash.

my phone won't let me log on or I would post under my username.

i see there is a 3rd Ch. but i will pass. i don't even want to think where you will take these soul mates next.

by adding jake you two things

1) there was never any love between the siblings because if there was they would never need or want anyone else in there lives sexually.

2) you proved the only thing youknow how to write is trash not GOOD EROTICA.

I appreciate your comments. And maybe adding Jake to the mix don't appeal to some but I stand by my work. I would love to read some stories you posted. And only a close minded individual would think sex and love are the same thing. And those who truly love know the difference and are happy to keep their sex life evolving and exciting. And those who truly love would do anything to please their partner even invite other people in their bed when the desire is mutual. . They are also very secure in their love and in their relationship. I hope you keep reading on the site and actually there are 4 chapters to the story. Thank you and keep smiling

First I want you to know my user name and real first name as I am waiting for Literotica to send me an e-mail to renew my password:

User- gta87

Real first name- David.

In one response you railed against some anonymous users about being closed minded and you said that only that type of person would equate sex and love. Not necessarily true. In a truly loving relationship between two soulmates, sex is the physical manifestation of their love for each other along with a host of other ways of expressing that love, a touch, caress, hug, cuddle etc. As a matched pair they would be so in tune with each other that they'd have no need for any outside assistance for each other.

Myself, I'm a voracious reader. I'm 56 yrs old, a US Navy Retiree and I"ve read many books, from Tolkien's works, Stephen R Donaldson, Every Star Trek and Star Wars novel I can get my hands on and books on military history like Wahoo by Richard H O'Kane. I'm not a writer but I can recognize great writing. Your first chapter was great and the emotions moved me. I've read many other stories and I've come across some that could be literary classics if not for the subject matter. Many are part of Lit.'s Hall of Fame and none of them took their stories in the direction you did. I'm talking about Colleen, Texas Refugee- auth., just about all of Beachbum1958's stories, GandTeton's, and Akbashev, only to name a few. So please don't judge me as closed minded; I know what I like and I voted Chapter 1 5 stars quite a few years back but what I read after rated no more than a 3 because adding more to the mix only creates the potential for unhallowed mayhem and incredible havoc in a relationship.....eventually certain ugly emotions will rear their ugly heads. In real life people lose their soulmates and possibly lives are lost too.

The following are 2 excepts from your first chapter:

1. "He began to speak once again and for the first time in in his life, Alex was blushing and acting shy. This made me more nervous. "It hit me that I wasn't being protective of you because you were my sister, but be...because you were my woman."

Tears started falling from my face. Alex wiped my cheeks and pressed forward, "I am in love with you Zoey. My head is telling me it's wrong because you are my twin sister, but my heart is telling a different story. I don't want you to kiss anyone else, I don't want anyone else to make you laugh that warm laugh of yours, and I don't want anyone else to make love to you. How could something that feels so right because you are my twin be so wrong. I am sorry if you don't feel the same, and I understand if you hate me." Alex dropped his head and tears begain to fall from his cheeks."

2. "Alex finally had to look away, and I watched as gulped the entire water bottle he held in his hand. I thought, "Zoey you are getting to him. Keep it up." That is when Jake came up to me, and planted a kiss on me that I wasn't expecting. His lips not as hot and soft as Alex's but wow could that boy kiss.

I couldn't help but respond. I have always had a little crush on Jake, and

his timing couldn't have been more perfect. When I opened my eyes after what seemed to be several long minutes, Alex was staring with his hand balled up into fists at his sides.

Your assertion that Alex had feelings for someone else when they first got together is not born out by chapter one. My second excerpt bears this out. It was Zoey who had always had a "little" crush on Jake. The possible intro of additional people into the relationship is not supported by the first excerpt as Alex plainly stated the he wanted to be the only man in Zoey's life as far as intimate relations go, NO ONE else, not Jake, not their sons. Are you planning to make Alex a cuckold? Must be as here's a spoiler alert.... In Chapter 3, you not only let Jake fuck Zoey in her pussy but you do it unprotected AND with a creampie during a DP scene. How does Alex go from an ALPHA male, ready to beat the snot out of his best friend even, to a bi-curious wimp, wuss wannabe? DOES not happen in real life? No. An Alpha dominant trait is GENETIC. It's hardwired into their bodies and age cannot change it. There is no room in their lives for anyone else except offspring and an insane drive to keep and defend what is theirs at all costs all the way up to DEATH. You need to clean up the inconsistencies and try again.