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A Place To Stay Ch. 01

byXxjustmeXx©
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by Anonymous

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by Anonymous04/18/11

Decent start

Good writing so far. You may have too many supporting characters. Chapter 1 seemed to end too soon. Please make chapter 2 longer/ develop the story further.

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by IrishSmile04/18/11

good start

but you made the main character only 15...im not entirely sure but i dont think underage sex is "allowed" on the site...maybe fast forward 3 years to the age of 18 before you make anything happen? or maybe nobody cares either way! but definitely keep writing :)

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