I felt I was hurried through to the ending. Like being on a museum tour, being rushed to make sure I saw everything and then outside, felt I missed savoring the experience. Who were these people in this story? Who knows? At the end...Who cares! Normally I like an economy of style and prose, but this just missed. The sex was extremely hot and well written on the positive side.
by
Anonymous04/26/11
lol @ "Remington solution works for us"
wimp_hater = self loathing?
#1: 8th graders should not be reading stories on this site.
#2: Isn't it past your bedtime?
Well written story so far, no doubt the pain of her divorce + lawsuit will make her back pain seem pretty mild in comparison
by
Anonymous04/26/11
well, this 'anon' likes the story so far
In terms of feeling a bit rushed, maybe so but better that than being too wordy. Maybe the editing (which was good) took out a couple sentences that could have stayed.
Good effort so far, keep writing!
More!
Next thing
The next thing heard was the sound of an 870 Remington pump jacking a round in the chamber prior to slaughtering this whore and all else involved.
idiot anons
Internet anon tough guy = real life sissy wuss
Husband might have a good civil case against the doc, who cares about a pre-nup if he can sue the doc, hospital, etc
Feel badly for daughter but hey; that lawsuit should provide a heckuva settlement so at least her college tuition is going to be pre-paid
Good story...
I felt I was hurried through to the ending. Like being on a museum tour, being rushed to make sure I saw everything and then outside, felt I missed savoring the experience. Who were these people in this story? Who knows? At the end...Who cares! Normally I like an economy of style and prose, but this just missed. The sex was extremely hot and well written on the positive side.
lol @ "Remington solution works for us"
wimp_hater = self loathing?
#1: 8th graders should not be reading stories on this site.
#2: Isn't it past your bedtime?
Well written story so far, no doubt the pain of her divorce + lawsuit will make her back pain seem pretty mild in comparison
well, this 'anon' likes the story so far
In terms of feeling a bit rushed, maybe so but better that than being too wordy. Maybe the editing (which was good) took out a couple sentences that could have stayed.
Good effort so far, keep writing!
good stuff
really enjoyed it-will there be another part?
Part Two
any shot at part two?!
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Kate Visits The Hospital or
More submissions by jack4221.