All Comments on 'Mafia Menage'

Not sure what that ending is all about. Just a joke after they cut here free? Or deciding who pops her?

Or is that the intent. Kind of a Sopranos ending. If that's it, you are one cruel cunt. :-)

Nice story. 5 star material.

No "real" people were connected with this little story.

Except me.

delicious

(AND reminds me of Troy, NY, and the pizza parlor with no pizza that was really a Mafia front.)

whether it's "satire" or mockery or the writer's true feelings--

You'd think that would come across in the writing--

he could have been wrong, but WP got it right for everything of mine he published--

EVERYTHING wasn't "true"--like childhood memories--approximations, fantasies--

i wrote to him every day--"working" on his assignments--

writing to him was an ecstatic experience

so he knew everything that went into my making a poem (to his assignments)--

if he hadn't seen this, would he still have been able to recognize whether it was "genuine" or not?

Just as in reading stuff at "Lit.," I read, with W.P., things, by him, I found repulsive (but I was crazy about him, so I persisted no matter what)--

in reading stuff at "Lit.," I experience my first reactions to prompts P. wrote--

but not written by someone I'm crazy about!

God, that was fun!

that's 9 firsts, and that's some going you know, none of them favorites [.] On some days there is total control, you drive the freeways better, you do everything better. Then the other days arrive when you even fear the check-out girl in the supermarket."

C. Bukowski, "Selected Letters 1978--1994, Vol. 3"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQLKk7puYxM

The above's supposed to be that French cartoon series that the--group?--got their name from.

I want a big white dog.

True lyrics--my joke!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhFnFBkcGAY "Hypnotise You" by N.E.R.D. (w/Daft Punk)

"I like you ...

20s, 50s, 5's, 10s .............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

I can make your sky feel sky blue ... "

Sweet--

How close are Daft Punk to being human, now?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4e94y4EjWGs

The above's supposed to be "We Are Human, After All," by Daft Punk.

(Very appropriate today, don't you think?)

"Thanks for coming, after all.

Human, human, human............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................ After all.

I'm just speculating. But if she did, I have no trouble with it. Why not? Why don't "you" go live in Mississippi. See how well you get along.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=34-F2Qftc_U

People have been known to--notice--their physical environments.

A few years ago, I kept hearing--people from Chicago (a--certain--part) referred to this way. Over and over it was "people from Chicago."

I'm laughing as I write this. My god--people from Chicago! No!

I didn't know the "background" of what they were talking about. I didn't know economic reasons (I think Iowa--City, at least--has closed those loopholes) for people from Chicago moving here--en masse? Or just trickling (down)?

That expression hasn't stopped making me laugh every time I even think it: "People from Chicago!"

If anyone from any place not here heard this (or am I just totally ignorant?)--no--horror is not too strong a word to use--and they kept hearing "people from Chicago"--what would they think?

Vampires? The Living Dead (no, that's--some--uh--io--nevermind), Zombies taking over the world (and raping our women--NO! That's a lie! Dead men don't have erections! [then why are they called "stiffs"?] UNLESS THEY'RE ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)?

And well it should!

"Universal love, huh? (a member of the Art Ensemble of Chicago) Ooooooo, what y'all into? ... Because something has to be done about this--"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bf7G-f8FXnk--link is supposed to be to "Les Stances A Sophie"

(Just look at the body language and facial expressions on the faces of these young French women--talking to Someone--but not just anyone--From Chicago.)

I saw these guys (and a woman*) at the Pink Palace in Memphis. Actually, they're sort of French, Japanese, and African (not in that order) in their mime movements, makeup, etc.

*Actually, I don't think the woman was with the group when I saw them.

by Art Ensemble of Chicago

The other link I posted didn't work--today. Probably this link won't work in 10 minutes.

(I'm not sure I saw Art Ensemble at Pink Palace. It might have been a small auditorium at Southwestern (now Rhodes) College at Memphis. This was quite a while back. And in a fog of cannibis.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bf7G-f8FXnk

hanging, breathlessly, on every word said by this musician from Art Ensemble of Chicago.

Adorableness-- allure, allurement, artistry, attraction, bloom, charm, class, comeliness, delicacy, elegance, exquisiteness, fairness, fascination, glamor, good looks, grace, handsomeness, loveliness, polish, pulchritude, refinement, shapeliness, style, symmetry, winsomeness--

my take--also a certain innocence and--just not jaded, definitely not jaded

The State I Am In

I was surprised, I was happy for a day in 1975

I was puzzled by a dream, it stayed with me all day in 1995

My brother had confessed that he was gay, it took the heat off me for a while

He stood up with a sailor friend and made it known upon my sister's wedding day

Got married in a rush to save a kid from being deported

Now she's in love

Oh, I was so touched, I was moved to kick the crutches from my crippled friend

She was not impressed that I cured her on the sabbath

I went to confess

When she saw the funny side, we introduced my child bride to whiskey and gin

To whiskey and gin

The priest in the booth had a photographic memory for all he had heard

He took all of my sins and he wrote a pocket novel called "The State That I'm In"

And so I gave myself to God

There was a pregnant pause before he said okay

Now I spend my days turning tables around in Mark's and Spencer's

They don't seem to mind

I gave myself to sin

I gave myself to providence

And I've been there and back again

The state that I am in

Oh, love of mine, would you condescend to help me

Because I'm stupid and blind

Oh, and desperation is the devil's work

It is the folly of a boy's empty mind

Oh, and now I'm feeling dangerous

Riding on city buses for a hobby is sad

Why don't you lead me to a living end

I promise that I'll entertain my crippled friend

My crippled friend

I gave myself to sin

I gave myself to providence

And I've been there and back again

The state that I am in

(I don't think I've ever COMPLETELY given myself to "sin" ... so ...

maybe not even any "sin," so ... there's no time like the present, as some religious people say ... i think)

I don't have a concept of "sin." I really don't.

I have a concept of ethics.

"Sin" seems like sticking pins in a doll. Like being Nora in "Nightwood." "Doctor, what of the night?" It has absoultely nothing to do with ethics, but everything to do with decadence, "perversion"---for the--don't admit it--"fun" of it--"I've sinned! I've sinned! Oh, god! I admit it before all these people! I was serviced by a prostitute! Forgive me, Oh Lord! Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm a Vampire! I drink blood! God help me!"

Right.

Useless--like wallowing in some self-pleasuring--something and claiming it's "bad"--for no reason--unless -to make it slimier and therefore more--or at all--exciting?

narcissistic--like the person's not REALLY concerned that they've done something seriously unethical--s/he just wants to wallow in the mud and at the same time pretend they're having some kind of-----------------something.

Which they are not.

on "nostalgie de la boue"

--by Jean-ClaudeCharlier Et Son (still looking up "nostalgie de la boue")

"Shub Niggurath - Lovecraftian in name, dark and menacing in nature. A captivating and strange rock-fusion, full of invention and far beyond anything you'll have heard before!"

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3 comments:

Labels: Label: Auricle, Shub-Niggurath

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Delta-Sleep-Inducing Peptide - Rebound

Cassette, C46

Label : Contaminated Productions, Italy, 1993

Ripped by Carlo

German duo on Italian label.

Delta-Sleep-Inducing Peptide is Siegmar Fricke + Dieter Maunson.

Some of their releases have been remastered and are available for free download here.

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3 comments:

Labels: Delta-Sleep-Inducing Peptide, Label: Contaminated Productions

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Hum Prōjimo - Ça Se Guérit

CD

Label : Glasnost Records, Germany, 1992

Ripped by Carlo

(P

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Labels: Hum Prōjimo, Label: Glasnost Records

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

A Thunder Orchestra / Vidna Obmana - Untitled

7"

Label : Climax Productions, Belgium, 1988

Limited edition of 200 copies

Ripped by Carlo

Tracklisting :

A1. A Thunder Orchestra - Rely On Kismet

A2. A Thunder Orchestra - Diabolical Gesture

B1. Vidna Obmana - Burnpassion

B2. Vidna Obmana - Inferno

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6 comments:

Labels: A Thunder Orchestra, Label: Climax Productions, Vidna Obmana

Saturday, June 8, 2013

Architects Office - 1987

Cassette, C46

Label : ADN, Italy, 1989

Ripped by Carlo

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2 comments:

Labels: Architects Office, Label: ADN

Saturday, June 1, 2013

Dan Joseph - The Woolly Mammoth Tapes (1989)

MP3 / FLAC

Label : Nostalgie De La Boue [ndlb#30], Ivory Coast, 2013

"The Woolly Mammoth Tapes is a collection of five previously unreleased ambient-industrial tracks composed in close chronological proximity during the very late 1980s. At the time I was still in Washington, DC, living and working in an industrial loft space at 1512 14th Street in a building that also housed, among other artists and cultural enterprises, the Woolly Mammoth Theater Company. While there is no literal connection between these tracks and the theater company, it's a meaningful association for me and helps to situate the music in its time and place.

The works mark the end of a 2 to 3-year period of working in this mode and stylistically follow three similar cassette releases - Morpheus (1987), Sonorous Alchemy (1988) and No.3 (1988), which were all distributed throughout the world by way of the international cassette underground. Further releases were in the works, but by that time I had already radically changed course musically and was beginning my formal composition studies that would take me to CalArts in Los Angeles in 1991, and nothing more was released.

These five tracks are among the best of my last remaining tape pieces and were all made on a Tascam 388 8-track porta-studio. The primary sound sources are electric guitar and a Korg DW8000 synthesizer, both heavily processed with an Ibanez DM-1100 digital delay and a Yamaha SPX90 multieffects processor. There is also a field recording made at Great Falls, MD (falls), and my voice (mammoth). The album image is a contemporaneous photo I took of my studio windows overlooking Church Street."

Dan Joseph

Tracklisting :

1. Gemini (10:47)

2. Falls (10:25)

3. Breathing (12:49)

4. Mammoth (10:11)

5. Rattle (11:05)

LISTEN / DOWNLOAD

2 comments:

Labels: Dan Joseph, Label: Nostalgie De La Boue

Saturday, May 25, 2013

Kopfschmerztablette - Kyoto 6 Protokoll

MP3 / FLAC

Label : Nostalgie De La Boue [ndlb#29], Ivory Coast, 2013

Tracklisting :

1. Kyoto 63 Genesis (03:08)

2. Kyoto 62 Black (03:40)

3. Kyoto 64 (01:53)

4. Kyoto 65 (01:09)

5. Kyoto 66 Protokoll (06:23)

6. Kyoto 638 Album Version (22:41)

7. Kyoto 67 (08:12)

8. Kyoto 68 Wald (06:30)

9. Kyoto 69 Wertverfall (15:17)

10. Kyoto 610 Panic Horror In Orient Express (08:19)

11. Kyoto 61 Tag X (04:39)

12. Kyoto 671 Schweres Wasser (10:30)

13. Kyoto 632 (04:52)

14. Kyoto 617 (03:25)

15. Kyoto 648 End (03:51)

LISTEN / DOWNLOAD

No comments:

Labels: Kopfschmerztablette, Label: Nostalgie De La Boue

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Janus - Necronomicon

Cassette, C60

Label : Minus Habens, Italy

Ripped by Carlo

Janus was Ulrich Demgen and his brother Andreas, from Germany.

Excellent tape !

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7 comments:

Labels: Janus, Label: Minus Habens

Friday, May 17, 2013

Solar Lodge - Heartbeat Of The Roses

Cassette, C40

Label : Minus Habens, Italy, 1989

Limited edition of 100 copies

Ripped by Carlo & Tommaso

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4 comments:

Labels: Label: Minus Habens, Solar Lodge

Monday, May 13, 2013

Nightmare Lodge - Big Mother In The Strain

Cassette, C46

Label : Minus Habens, Italy, 1987

Ripped by Carlo

Seems to be the very first release by Nightmare Lodge as well as Minus Habens.

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2 comments:

Labels: Ivan Iusco, Label: Minus Habens, Nightmare Lodge

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Nightmare Lodge - Asylum

Cassette, C46

Label : Minus Habens, Italy, 1991

Ripped by Carlo

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5 comments:

Labels: Ivan Iusco, Label: Minus Habens, Nightmare Lodge

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Capricorni Pneumatici - Nibbas

Cassette, C46

Label : Minus Habens, Italy, 1989

Limited edition of 100 numbered copies

Ripped by Carlo

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4 comments:

Labels: Capricorni Pneumatici, Label: Minus Habens

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Capricorni Pneumatici - Witchcraft

Cassette, C40, Single-sided

Label : SSS Production, Italy, 1989

Ripped by Carlo

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4 comments:

Labels: Capricorni Pneumatici, Label: 666 Production, Label: SSS Production

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Capricorni Pneumatici - Über Artaud

Cassette, C46

Label : SSS Production, Italy, 1988

Ripped by Carlo

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3 comments:

Labels: Capricorni Pneumatici, Label: 666 Production, Label: SSS Production

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Ambienti Coassiali - Vol. 1 Room 1-6

Cassette, C46

Label : SSS Production, Italy, 1988

Ripped by Carlo

Featuring Riccardo Sinigaglia.

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4 comments:

Labels: Ambienti Coassiali, Label: 666 Production, Label: SSS Production, Riccardo Sinigaglia

Friday, April 19, 2013

Zos Kia - Introduction To The Ritual

Cassette, C30

Label : 666 Production, Italy, 1988

Ripped by Carlo

An Italian Zos Kia, not the pre-Coil one...

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4 comments:

Labels: Label: 666 Production, Label: SSS Production, Zos Kia

Monday, April 15, 2013

O'Nancy In French - Untitled

Cassette, C45

Label : 777 Was 666, Japan / originally released by AQM, Japan, 1984

Ripped by Monsieur Morbidito

"My copy is 777was666 reissue (or bootleg?). It is quite subtle material, not sure if the original AQM tapes sounded similar. Still I find this simple and crude material very beautiful". Monsieur Morbidito

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1 comment:

Labels: Label : AQM, Label: 777 Was 666, Label: Beast 666 Tapes, Label: Beast 777, O'Nancy In French

Thursday, April 11, 2013

z.B.u.ä. with Kapotte Muziek - Buuhndahmaging

Cassette, C46

Label unknown, 1991

Ripped by Monsieur Morbidito

A while ago I've posted a rare z.B.u.ä. cassette. Here is another one.

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No comments:

Labels: Kapotte Muziek, z.B.u.ä.

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Synthetisches Mischgewebe - Untitled

Cassette, C60

Label : Faltenfrei, Germany, circa 1980

Ripped by Monsieur Morbidito

Very obscure cassette of pre-Das Synthetische Mischgewebe music.

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4 comments:

Labels: Das Synthetische Mischgewebe, Guido Hübner, Label: Faltenfrei, Synthetisches Mischgewebe

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Crawling With Tarts / Death Ranch - Death Ranch / Crawling With Tarts

MP3 / FLAC

Label : Nostalgie De La Boue [ndlb#28], Ivory Coast, 2013

Re-release of an old forgotten tape by great american artists from the Big City Orchestra sphere.

Tracklisting :

1. S1T1 (00:19)

2. S1T2 (04:04)

3. S1T3 (11:54)

4. S1T4 (04:06)

5. S1T5 (11:13)

6. S2T1 (07:21)

7. S2T2 (03:21)

8. S2T3 (10:12)

9. S2T4 (10:33)

LISTEN / DOWNLOAD

3 comments:

Labels: Cliff Neighbors, Crawling With Tarts, Deathranch, Label: Nostalgie De La Boue, Michael Gendreau, Peter Leeming, Suzanne Dycus-Gendreau

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Hiroshi Hasegawa - Sanzagaike

MP3 / FLAC

Label : Nostalgie De La Boue [ndlb#27], Ivory Coast, 2013

Hiroshi Hasegawa is the man behind C.C.C.C. and Astro. Sanzagaike is a new album recorded between november 2012 and january 2013.

Tracklisting :

1. Sanzagaike (35:47)

2. Silver Blossoms (20:05)

LISTEN / DOWNLOAD

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Labels: Hiroshi Hasegawa, Label: Nostalgie De La Boue

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Achim Wollscheid - This is a piece for Tristan Koreya's netlabel Nostalgie de la boue

MP3 / FLAC

Label : Nostalgie De La Boue [ndlb#26], Ivory Coast, 2013

Tracklisting :

1. This is a piece for Tristan Koreya's netlabel Nostalgie de la boue (6:15)

LISTEN / DOWNLOAD

No comments:

Labels: Achim Wollscheid, Label: Nostalgie De La Boue

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Hybryds & Weydas - Hybrys Versus Weydas

MP3 / FLAC

Label : Nostalgie De La Boue [ndlb#25], Ivory Coast, 2013

Great collaboration album between well-known belgian band Hybryds and obscure artist Weydas. Recorded in 1996.

Tracklisting :

1. Untitled (5:14)

2. Untitled (4:58)

3. Untitled (4:21)

4. Untitled (6:13)

5. Untitled (4:06)

6. Untitled (3:51)

7. Untitled (3:36)

8. Untitled (5:03)

9. Untitled (2:05)

10. Untitled (4:01)

11. Untitled (3:21)

12. Untitled (5:38)

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1 comment:

Labels: Hybryds, Label: Nostalgie De La Boue, Weydas

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Raksha Mancham - Ten-Dzong Ma-Mi (The Faith's Fortress Fighters)

LP

Label : Kangyur Recordings, Belgium, 1989

With that third and last Raksha Mancham LP (that includes few reworked tracks from "The Way Of Dead Indians" and "Demain Est Le Dernier Jour" cassettes), the complete Kangyur Recordings / Raksha Mancham pre-CD discography in now available on that blog.

Tracklisting :

Kham Side

A1. Culturcide (Initial Part) (1:48)

A2. Chu-Shi Khang-Druk (6:15)

A3. Combat Of Faith (3:03)

A4. Chams (1:54)

A5. Fight (4:20)

sMon-Thangs Side

B1. The Way Of The Abyss (3:12)

B2. Waiting For Someone Who's Already Gone Away (4:25)

B3. Thoughts (To Drolma And Tara) (1:53)

B4. Karma (Aphrodite) (5:16)

B4. Culturcide (Final Part) (1:27)

B5. Gyaltsen (2:19)

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Labels: Label: Kangyur Recordings, Raksha Mancham

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Raksha Mancham - Far From The Eyes Of The World

LP

Label : Kangyur Recordings, Belgium, 1988

Second Raksha Mancham LP, including new versions of two tracks from the first LP.

Tracklisting :

A1. Armenian Nightmare (Tribal War) (4:28)

A2. The Last Indian (2:57)

A3. Wounded Knee (1:11)

A4. Kepulauan (4:14)

B1. The Prisoner (Benjamin Moloise) (1:38)

B2. Aborigenee (4:59)

B3 + B4. The Pornography Of Despair + Red Star Over Tibet (2:34)

B5. The Last Days Of Khay Wangdi (2:33)

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1 comment:

Labels: Label: Kangyur Recordings, Raksha Mancham

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Raksha Mancham - The Way Of Dead Indians

Cassette, C90

Label : Dark Tapes / Kangyur Recordings, Belgium, 1987

Ripped by paphio23

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5 comments:

Labels: Label: Dark Tapes, Label: Kangyur Recordings, Raksha Mancham

Friday, February 22, 2013

Bardo Thödöl - Dead In Lithang

Cassette, C60

Label : Kangyur Recordings, Belgium, 1987

Limited edition of 108 copies

Ripped by paphio23

Months ago I've posted a few Raksha Mancham / Kangyur Recordings releases. Here are some more.

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1 comment:

Labels: Bardo Thödöl, Label: Kangyur Recordings, Raksha Mancham

Monday, February 18, 2013

Schlafengarten - Memorandum

Cassette, C60

Label : Schlafengarten, US, 1984

Ripped by paphio23

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No comments:

Labels: Label: Schlafengarten, Schlafengarten

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Various Artists - Berlin Bruit

LP

Label : Ironflame, Germany, 2008

Ripped by paphio23

That LP was released for the Berlin Bruit festival on August 30, 2008.

Each visitor received with the ticket a hand-numbered and individual copy with the # and his name written on the label sticker.

Tracklisting :

A1. Last Dominion Lost - Perdue (5:48)

A2. Z'EV - Untitled (4:47)

A3. Sutcliffe Jugend - What If (Blind Ignorant) (5:33)

B1. nEGEPADRES.3.3. - Djeloul The Emerald Rorqual (5:57)

B2. Column One - Queens Of Alley (6:21)

B3. Ditterich v. Euler-Donnersperg - Die Pickelbacke Des Kleinen Fritz (4:04)

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1 comment:

Labels: Column One, Ditterich von Euler-Donnersperg, Label: Ironflame, Last Dominion Lost, nEGAPADRES.3.3., Sutcliffe Jugend, Z'EV

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exclusive releases

Nostalgie De La Boue (Bandcamp)

ndlb#30 - Dan Joseph

ndlb#29 - Kopfschmerztablette

ndlb#28 - Crawling With Tarts / Death Ranch

ndlb#27 - Hiroshi Hasegawa

ndlb#26 - Achim Wollscheid

ndlb#25 - Hybryds & Weydas

ndlb#24 - John Hudak

ndlb#23 - Vox PoPuLi! / VOX 231

ndlb#22 - blackhumour

ndlb#21 - :zoviet*france:

ndlb#20 - Illusion Of Safety

ndlb#19 - Eric Lunde

ndlb#18 - Laurent Pernice

ndlb#17 - If, Bwana

ndlb#16 - Kaiser Nietzsche

ndlb#15 - In Aeternam Vale

ndlb#14 - W. David Oliphant

ndlb#13 - Randy Greif

ndlb#12 - IOSS (Jos Smolders)

ndlb#11 - Lieutenant Caramel

ndlb#10 - Mortification To The Flesh

ndlb#09 - Rainier Lericolais

ndlb#08 - The Colors Thieves

ndlb#07 - PBK

ndlb#06 - Le Syndicat MMX

ndlb#05 - Pacific 231

ndlb#04 - Big City Orchestra

ndlb#03 - Klood

ndlb#02 - The Haters

ndlb#01 - Not Half

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Artist: 6comm

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Artist: Attrition

Artist: Beequeen

Artist: Big City Orchestra

Artist: Biosphere

Artist: Bruno Moreigne

Artist: Club Moral

Artist: Con-Hertz

Artist: Coph Nia

Artist: Dan Joseph

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Artist: Dead Voices On Air

Artist: Deutsch Nepal

Artist: Edward Ka-Spel

Artist: Esplendor Geométrico

Artist: Fabio Orsi

Artist: Hal McGee

Artist: Hybryds

Artist: If, Bwana

Artist: Illusion Of Safety

Artist: In Aeternam Vale

Artist: Jeff Central

Artist: John Hudak

Artist: Jos Smolders

Artist: Kirchenkampf

Artist: Konstruktivists

Artist: Kopschmerztablette

Artist: Le Syndicat MMX

Artist: M.Nomized

Artist: M.Nomized - Fusions

Artist: Michael Northam

Artist: Mystified

Artist: Nadja

Artist: Nocturnal Emissions

Artist: Nurse With Wound

Artist: O Yuki Conjugate + The Sons Of Silence

Artist: Oval

Artist: Pacific 231

Artist: Peter Hope

Artist: Pharmakustik

Artist: Philippe Laurent

Artist: Psyclones

Artist: Renault Schubert

Artist: Roger Doyle

Artist: Scattered Order

Artist: Schloss Tegal

Artist: Severed Heads

Artist: Steven Severin

Artist: The Implicit Order

Artist: The Legendary Pink Dots

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Artist: Troum

Artist: Usher

Artist: Victor Nubla

Artist: Violence And The Sacred

Artist: Von Magnet

Artist: W. David Oliphant

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Label: Fraction Studio Compilation

Label: Gronde Murmure

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Label: Inner Cinema

Label: Institute For Alien Research

Label: Kokeshidisk

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Label: Lens Records

Label: M-Tronic

Label: Muchausen Sound

Label: Optical Sound

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Label: Otorragie [Split With Wehwalt]

Label: Projekt

Label: Red Light Sound Records

Label: Sillage Intemporel

Label: Syrphe

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Various: Cassette Art Classics

soundcloud

Artist: :zoviet*france:

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Artist: Atom Earth Mother

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Artist: Chris Carter

Artist: Dada Action Group

Artist: David Oliphant

Artist: Desiderii Marginis

Artist: DSIP

Artist: Eric Trochu

Artist: Fabio Orsi

Artist: Gerechtigkeits Liga

Artist: Gnome & Spybey

Artist: Herbst9

Artist: Hunting Lodge

Artist: Hybryds

Artist: If, Bwana

Artist: In Aeternam Vale

Artist: Jeph Jerman

Artist: John Hudak

Artist: John Kamevaar

Artist: Kelly Cowan

Artist: KK Null

Artist: Konstruktivists

Artist: Kopfschmerztablette

Artist: La Nomenklatur

Artist: Le Syndicat MMX

Artist: Les 3 Phallus

Artist: Lieutenant Caramel

Artist: Lustmord

Artist: MaCu

Artist: Mauro Teho Teardo

Artist: Michael Northam

Artist: Minamata

Artist: Not Half

Artist: Pacific 231

Artist: PBK

Artist: Peer Saer

Artist: Pharmakustik

Artist: raison d'être

Artist: Riccardo Sinigaglia

Artist: Richard Pinhas

Artist: Ruelgo

Artist: Scanner

Artist: Schloss Tegal

Artist: Seth Nehil

Artist: The Neon Judgement

Artist: Tiburce

Artist: Usher

Artist: Violence And The Sacred

Label: Auricular Records

Label: Brainwashed

Label: Earlabs

Label: Industrial Records

Label: Lens Records

Label: Noiseambient [PBK]

Label: taâlem

index

180° (1) 2tokiislands (1) 3 Way Dance (1) 40318 (1) 6de Kolonne (1) A Gethsemani (1) A Primary Industry (1) A Thunder Orchestra (1) A Violated Body (1) A.I.Z (9) Abner Malaty (6) Absolute Body Control (4) Abstract Belief (1) Abt. 409 (1) Achim Wollscheid (5) Adam Bohman (1) AER (1) Agencement (1) Agog (1) Ain Soph (1) Al Conroy (1) Al Margolis (9) Alain Basso (4) Alain Neffe (2) Alan Lee (1) Algebra Suicide (2) Alien Planetscapes (1) Alio Die (1) Allegory Chapel Ltd. (1) Alvars Orkester (1) Amazing Games (1) Ambienti Coassiali (1) AMK (2) Ampzilla's Delight (3) Andreas Grosser (1) Andrew Chalk (2) Andrew Cox (5) Andrew Hulme (1) Andrew Lewis (1) Andrew McKenzie (4) Andy Eardley (1) Anenzephalia (1) ANKH (4) Anne Gillis (5) Annie Anxiety (1) Annie Anxiety And The Asexuals (1) Anthon Shield (4) Anton Ignorant (2) Appi (3) Arcane Device (1) Architects Office (2) Arnovah (5) Art Deco (1) Art Remains Tangible (1) Arthur Berkhoff (1) Arthur Potter (1) Arvid Tuba (2) As If² Bwana (1) Asmus Tietchens (7) Assassins (1) Attrition (3) Aube (5) Audiopeste (1) Autopsia (1) Avant-Dernières Pensées (2) Axel Grube (1) Axel Kyrou (4) Axis Mixor (2) B. Wolf (1) Bambix (1) Band Of Holy Joy (2) Bande Berne Crematoire (1) Bardo Thödöl (1) Barry Anderson (1) Bast (1) Baudrite D. (1) Belt (3) Ben Ponton (5) Bene Gesserit (3) Berlinerluft (1) Bernard C. (1) Bernard Donzel-Gargand (2) Bernard Nguyen (1) Betrayal (1) Big City Orchestra (67) Big Fat Spic (1) Birdcage Walk (1) Blackhouse (4) blackhumour (8) Blind Hunters (1) Blinddarm (1) Block 57 (1) Blood Robots (1) Bo Black (1) Bocal 5 (1) Bodhi Beat Poets (1) Bogart (10) Boredoms (2) Borghesia (1) Bourbonese Qualk (13) Boyd Rice (1) Brain Discipline (5) Brian Charles (1) Brighter Death Now (3) Brion Gysin (1) Bron Area (1) Bruno Cossano (4) C.C.C.C. (2) Cabaret Du Ciel (1) Camera Obscura (1) Capricorni Pneumatici (3) Catharsist (2) Cement Women (1) Cent Ans De Solitude (2) Chaotic Custom Cock Commandos (1) Chazev (1) Chop Shop (1) Chris + Cosey (1) Chris Block (2) Chris Gross (1) Christian Marclay (1) Christine Defives (1) City Of Worms (1) Clair Obscur (2) Clau D.E.D.I. (1) Claude Jordan (1) Click Click (1) Cliff Neighbors (28) Clock DVA (1) Club Moral (7) Collaboration (1) Collectif Et Cie (1) Column One (1) Comando Bruno (2) Con-Dom (4) ConDemek (1) Conditions Extr;M: (1) Contact With A Curve (1) Contagious Orgasm (1) Context (1) Controlled Bleeding (8) Cool And The Clones (1) Copulation (1) Costes (7) Cranioclast (4) Crash Worship (2) Crawl Unit (1) Crawling With Tarts (3) Croiners (2) Croniamantal (1) Cross Arc. (1) Cruel When Complete (1) Ctephin (1) Cyrnai (1) D.A.R.P.A. (1) D.D. Dobson (1) Daevid Allen (1) Dan Burke (11) Dan Joseph (6) Daniel Menche (1) Daniele Ciulini (1) Dark Alceste De Socaï Vômie (2) Das (65) Das Kunst (1) Das Synthetische Mischgewebe (15) Data-Bank-A (1) Dave Clark (1) Dave Diesing (1) David Elliott (3) David Prescott (2) David Tibet (2) Dazibao (1) DDAA (5) De Fabriek (9) Dead Neubautens (1) Dead Tech (2) Dead Womb (1) Deaf Goes East (1) Death Tricheco (1) Deathranch (3) Debbie Jaffe (2) Deca (1) Deleted (2) Deliberate Composition (1) Deliens Roger (1) Delta-Sleep-Inducing Peptide (1) Denier Du Culte (4) Der Akteur (3) Der Plan (1) Der Schwarze Kanal (1) Deux Baleines Blanches (1) Deux Filles (1) Deux Pingouins (1) Dhismâ (1) Diana Rogerson (1) Didier Moulinier (1) Die Bunker (1) Die Desultorische Detonation (1) Die Form (5) Die Rache (1) Die Sonne Satan (1) Die Todschicke Wut (1) Die Vorkriegszeit (1) Die Wohnhaft (1) Dino Oon (1) Dirk Serries (3) Diseño Corbusier (2) Dislocation (2) Dissecting Table (3) Disumana Res (1) Ditterich von Euler-Donnersperg (1) Ditto (1) Dive (1) DMA2 (12) DMDN (2) Doc Wör Mirran (3) Dominique Petitgand (2) Don Campau (1) Donna Klemm (1) Dorian Gray (1) Doro Franck (1) Doug Walker (1) Dressed Up Animals (1) Due Process (5) Dumbus 1st Nightschool Love (1) DumDum Score (1) DunDun Ensemble (1) DZ Lectric (6) Désaccord Majeur (4) Ear Ache (1) Edward Ka-Spel (3) Eel O. (2) Egas L. (2) Eiger Nordwand (2) Einsturzende Neubauten (1) Elcarna (1) Emil Beaulieau (1) Empirical Sleeping Consort (1) Endraum (1) Enema + Gejonte (2) Engel Der Vernichtung (1) English Subtitles (1) Enigmatica Settimana (1) Ennaiaam (1) Enno Velthuys (1) Enrico Piva (1) Entre Vifs (2) Eric Lunde (5) Esplendor Geométrico (2) Esruk (1) Etant Donnés (7) Etat Des Stocks (1) Eugenik Korrectiv Squad (1) Evan Parker (1) Everlasting Happy Life (1) Existenz (1) F:A.R. (5) factor X (1) Fallout (1) Falx Cerebri (2) Famlende Forsøk (1) Fat (1) Fatal Impact (1) Ferial Confine (1) Fiori Carones (5) Fireside And Fury (1) Flesh (1) fLEUR dU mINIMAL (1) Formule Tag (1) François Douris (1) Freudwerk (2) Front Line Assembly (2) Fronte Orientale (1) Funharm (1) G M (1) G*Park (1) Galeshka Moravioff (1) Gazza November (1) Gefäss + Vehikel (3) Geins't Naït (8) Generated Progression (1) Genocide Organ (3) Gerechtigkeits Liga (3) Germain Scalp (1) German Shepherds (3) Gerstein (3) Giancarlo Toniutti (2) Gilbert And George (1) Glenn Michael Wallis (1) Greater Than One (4) Gregorio Bardini (1) Gregory Whitehead (2) Grim (1) Groupe 33 (1) Guido Hübner (9) Gum (1) Gush (1) GX Jupitter-Larsen (7) H.N.A.S. (2) Hal McGee (1) Hamas (1) Hanatarash (4) Hands To (13) Harald Sack Ziegler (1) Heads On Sticks (1) Heavenly Bodies (1) Heltir (1) Henry Hektik (1) Hessel Veldman (1) Het Zweet (4) Hijokaidan (2) Hiroshi Hasegawa (1) His Name Is Alive (1) Hit By A Truck (1) Holeist (1) Howling Of Himalaya (1) Hula (1) Hum Prōjimo (1) Human Flesh (7) Human Head Transplant (5) Hunting Lodge (1) Hybryds (4) Hänzel + Gretzel (3) I Giardini Di Marzo (2) I.B.F. (1) If Bwana (8) Illusion Of Safety (18) In Aeternam Vale (3) In The Nursery (1) Incapacitants (6) Institut Für Psycho-Hygiene (1) Internal Fusion (4) Inzekt (2) Ios Smolders (3) IOSS (4) Isabelle Chemin (2) Ivan Iusco (2) Jane Studer (1) Janus (1) Jay Closser (1) JDM (1) Jean-Claude Charlier Et Son Orchestre (3) Jean-Louis Houchard (1) Jean-Luc André (3) Jean-Philippe Fée (4) Jeff Greinke (2) Jeff Laryngo (2) Jeph Jerman (11) Jesus Drum (1) Jhon A.I.D.S. (1) Jim O'Rourke (4) Jocelyn Medrano (1) Joe Papa (1) Joel Bender (2) John Balance (1) John Duncan (3) John Eberly (1) John Hudak (3) John Murphy (6) John Watermann (1) John Wiggins (2) John Zewizz (3) Joke Lanz (3) Jonathan Briley (2) Jordi Valls (1) Jos Smolders (3) Josef K. Noyce (1) Joseph B. Raimond (1) Joseph Raguin (1) Jouissance (2) JP 118 (1) Juan Crek (1) June Shenfield (1) K.B.H. (1) K.D.N.R. (1) Kaiser Nietzsche (3) Kallabris (1) Kapotte Muziek (2) Karo (1) Kathy Acker (1) Ken Clinger (1) Kent Tankred (1) Kerri Pidnow (5) Kevin Harrison (1) Kevin Tomkins (1) Kill S.P.K (1) Kim Cascone (5) Kino Glaz (1) Kiyoshi Mizutani (1) Klangkrieg (1) Klaus Groh (1) Kleg (1) Klimperei (1) Klinik (1) Klood (7) Koan (1) Koji Marutani (1) Konrad Kraft (1) Konstruktivists (3) Konya Dance (1) Kopfschmerztablette (4) Kora (1) Krang (3) Krank (1) Kurt Griesch (1) L'Akstremaunçió (3) L'Éponge Synthétique (2) L. D. 50 (1) L.O.S.P. (1) L.S.D. (5) La Muerte (2) La Nomenklatur (12) La Sonorité Jaune (10) Label : AQM (1) Label: Pursuit Of Market Share (1) Label: 666 Production (4) Label: 777 Was 666 (1) Label: A.R.P.H. Tapes (1) Label: Abstinence Records (1) Label: Ache (1) Label: Active Production (1) Label: Actéon (2) Label: ADN (2) Label: Adventures In Reality (1) Label: Afflict Records (1) Label: Alien Artists (2) Label: Altvinyl (1) Label: AMEG (2) Label: Anckarström (1) Label: Angel Records (1) Label: Animist Recording (1) Label: Anomalous Records (1) Label: Apraxia (1) Label: Aquilifer Sodality (1) Label: Arbeit Group (1) Label: Ars Nova (1) Label: Art Directe (2) Label: Artware (6) Label: audiofile Tapes (4) Label: Auf Abwegen (1) Label: Auricle (1) Label: Auxilio De Cientos (2) Label: AW (1) Label: Banned Production (5) Label: Beast 666 Tapes (7) Label: Beast 777 (2) Label: Big Body Parts (5) Label: Big Noise In Archgate (1) Label: Biotope Art Organization (3) Label: Black Orchid Productions (1) Label: Blade Records (6) Label: Body Records (1) Label: Bog-Art (8) Label: Broken Flag (1) Label: Brothering Tape (1) Label: Bruno Cossano Corporation (1) Label: Börft Records (6) Label: Calypso Now (2) Label: Cathexis Recordings (2) Label: Cauchy Productions (1) Label: Cause And Effect (2) Label: Charrm (1) Label: Chimik Communications (1) Label: Cintas (1) Label: Climax Productions (3) Label: Clockwork Tapes (1) Label: Collectif Et Cie (2) Label: Come Organisation (2) Label: Complacency (4) Label: Concrete Company (2) Label: Concrete Productions (1) Label: Contaminated Productions (1) Label: Corrosive Tapes (1) Label: CorZar Records (1) Label: Croda On Tape (1) Label: Cthulhu Records (2) Label: Dancetaria (9) Label: Dancing Industries (1) Label: Dark Side (1) Label: Dark Tapes (1) Label: Dark Vinyl (1) Label: Das Cassetten Combinat (1) Label: Dasein (1) Label: Deaf Eye (2) Label: Dedali Opera (2) Label: Ding Dong Records And Tapes (1) Label: Diputación De Zaragoza (1) Label: Discipline Produzioni (2) Label: Discordia Concordia (1) Label: Divided (1) Label: DMA2 (12) Label: DOM (1) Label: Doomsday Transmissions (1) Label: Dossier (3) Label: Drone Records (2) Label: DTW (1) Label: Désaccord Majeur (2) Label: Déviation Culturelle (1) Label: E'ostrate (1) Label: E(r)ostrate (1) Label: Ear-Rational Records (1) Label: Earthly Delights (2) Label: Ecto Tapes (3) Label: EE Tapes (4) Label: Empty Records (3) Label: Entr'acte (1) Label: Epitapes (3) Label: Eskimo Records (1) Label: Europa (2) Label: Evolutionary Music (1) Label: Exit Tapes (1) Label: Extreme (1) Label: Faltenfrei (1) Label: FARN (5) Label: Fast Forward Recordings (1) Label: Final Image (3) Label: Forced Nostalgia (1) Label: Freedom In A Vacuum (9) Label: Freudwerk (1) Label: Geschmack Records (2) Label: Giraffe Rec. (1) Label: Glasnost Records (1) Label: Glass Records (1) Label: Gracia Territori Sonor (1) Label: HalTapes (1) Label: Halte Aux Records (1) Label: Harsh Reality Music (4) Label: Home Produkt (1) Label: Hypnobeat (1) Label: Illusion Production (1) Label: Impressure (2) Label: Individual VOD (1) Label: Industrial Therapy Unit (1) Label: Inesistente Produzioni (1) Label: Inner Ear Recordings (1) Label: Inner-X-Musick (3) Label: Insane Music (1) Label: Ironflame (1) Label: Isomorphic Records (1) Label: Kadef (1) Label: Kangyur Recordings (7) Label: Kaon (1) Label: Kill Your Idol (1) Label: Korm Plastics (3) Label: La Légende Des Voix (1) Label: La Nomenklatur (2) Label: La Procédure (1) Label: Laboratorio De Música Desconocida (1) Label: Ladd-Frith (4) Label: Le Réseau (1) Label: Le Syndicat (7) Label: Les Disques Du Soleil (1) Label: Les Nourritures Terrestres (5) Label: Les Nouvelles Propagandes (10) Label: Lor Tapes (1) Label: Lowlife Audio (1) Label: M.T.T. Records (2) Label: Major Records (1) Label: Markus Schwill (2) Label: Mechanical Orchestration Music (1) Label: Mental Hygiene Cassettes (1) Label: Metamkine (1) Label: Midas Music (5) Label: Midas Tapes (1) Label: Ministry Of Ultramarine Theatres (1) Label: Minus Habens (12) Label: Minóy Cassetteworks (1) Label: Mission Papua Holland (1) Label: Misty Circles (1) Label: Multimood (1) Label: Multiple Configuration (2) Label: Musica Maxima Magnetica (1) Label: Mutant Cactus Recordings (1) Label: N D (1) Label: N4300 W8752 (1) Label: Negative Foundation (1) Label: Nekrophile Rekords (1) Label: Nemesis (2) Label: Newcastle Media Workshops (1) Label: Nirvana Studio (1) Label: Noctovision (1) Label: Nos Yeux Aveugles (2) Label: Nostalgie De La Boue (30) Label: Nuit Et Brouillard (1) Label: Odd Size (1) Label: Old Europa Cafe (1) Label: Opción Sónica (1) Label: Organik (1) Label: Otorragie (2) Label: Out Of Nowhere (1) Label: Parano Art Production (2) Label: Perfido Incanto Prodx. (1) Label: Permis De Construire (6) Label: Permis De Construire Deutschland (3) Label: Peuleschille Tapes (1) Label: Phlenge Guppy Rec (1) Label: Pigture Disc (1) Label: Plague Recordings (4) Label: Play Loud (1) Label: Post-Brutal (1) Label: Potentia Records (2) Label: Prion (1) Label: Process Record (1) Label: Psychic Rally (2) Label: Psychopathia (1) Label: Quiet Artworks (1) Label: Rangehen (1) Label: Rassclat Inc. (2) Label: Realization Recordings (8) Label: Recloose Organisation (2) Label: Reduktive Musiken (1) Label: Regelwidrig (2) Label: Rendezvouz Radikal (1) Label: Requiem Productions (1) Label: Roil Noise Offensive (2) Label: ROIR (1) Label: RRR (6) Label: S.J. 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:zoviet*france: - # Complete Discography

:zoviet*france: - # Various Live Recordings

:zoviet*france: - A Flock Of Rotations [CD]

:zoviet*france: - A Flock Of Rotations [LP]

:zoviet*france: - Assault And Mirage [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Collusion [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Digilogue [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Eostre [2 x LP]

:zoviet*france: - Eostre [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Garista [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Garista [LP]

:zoviet*france: - Gesture Signal Threat [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Gris [10"]

:zoviet*france: - In.Version [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Just An Illusion [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Live At Earshot Festival, Newcastle, UK, 1990 [Unreleased]

:zoviet*france: - Live At MS Stubnitz, 1998 [Unreleased]

:zoviet*france: - Live In Chula Vista, California, USA, 1991 [Unreleased]

:zoviet*france: - Loh Land [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Look Into Me [2 x LP]

:zoviet*france: - Look Into Me [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Misfits, Loony Tunes And Squalid Criminals [LP]

:zoviet*france: - Mohnomishe [2 x LP]

:zoviet*france: - Mohnomishe [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Mort Aux Vaches [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Music For A Spaghetti Western [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Norsch [LP]

:zoviet*france: - Popular Soviet Songs And Youth Music [3 x CD]

:zoviet*france: - Shadow, Thief Of The Sun [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Shouting At The Ground [CD]

:zoviet*france: - The Decriminalisation Of Country Music [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Untitled (aka Hessian) [CD]

:zoviet*france: - Vienna 1990 [CD]

:zoviet*france: - What Is Not True [CD]

:zoviet*france: / Jim O'Rourke / The Hafler Trio - Untitled [CD]

A-Soma & Eve Libertine - Last One Out Turns Off The Lights [LP]

A.B.G.S. - Echte [CD]

A.B.G.S. - Werksbeschallung [Cassette]

A.I.Z - Excrementals [Cassette]

Abner Malaty - Glide [7"]

Achim Wollscheid - Ambivalenz/Askese [Cassette]

Achim Wollscheid - Der Freie Fall [Cassette]

Achim Wollscheid - Der Gefasste Raum [Cassette]

Achim Wollscheid - In Your Necessary Ear [7"]

Achwghâ Ney Wodeï - Triptyque [3 x LP]

Alain Basso - Ab Irato [CD]

Algebra Suicide - Swoon [CD]

Algebra Suicide - The Secret Like Crazy [LP]

Anthon Shield / Reed 013 - Mécaniques Bébés / Musiques Cruelles [Cassette]

Arcane Device - Seven [Cassette]

Architects Office - Caswallon The Headhunter [LP]

Art & Technique - Alea Jacta Est [12"]

Art & Technique - Diabolus In Mecanica [LP]

Art & Technique - Putsch In Memoriam [7"]

Asmus Tietchens - Raum 318 [Cassette]

Attrition - Death House [LP]

Attrition - Onslaught [Cassette]

Avant-Dernières Pensées - Radiante Porvenir [LP]

Bene Gesserit & Usward - Secret Mind, Postal Project [Cassette]

Bene Gesserit - A High, Happy, Perverse And Cynical Cry Of Joy... [LP]

Bene Gesserit - Fashion Is A Dirty Word [LP]

Bene Gesserit - Kidnapping [7"]

Bene Gesserit - Live In Belgium And Holland [Cassette]

Bene Gesserit - Music For The Fun Of It [LP]

Bernard C. - Lieu Magique [LP]

Bernard C. - Prince Emile De LY De Magneville [Cassette]

Bernard C. - Socialist Realism [7"]

blackhumour - ... it was inappropriate [Cassette]

blackhumour - binary (and/or) [Cassette]

blackhumour - breathing like marcel [Cassette]

blackhumour - peace in our time [Cassette]

blackhumour - penetration [Cassette]

blackhumour - radical positive [2 x Cassette]

blackhumour - romance [LP]

blackhumour - truth about the dinosaurs [5 x Cassette]

Blair Petrie - Untitled [LP]

Bocal 5 - Moska / Babouin Calin [7"]

Borghesia - Live At Rockfabrik, Ubach Palenberg, 19.09.1988 [Unreleased]

Borghesia - Live In Kulusic, 1991 [unreleased]

Borghesia - Ljubav Je Hladnija Od Smrti [LP]

Bourbonese Qualk - Diogenes Nijmegen 9-9-86 [Cassette]

Bourbonese Qualk - Live At Frigorificos Do Bacalhau, Porto, Portugal, 1987 [Unreleased]

Bourbonese Qualk - Live At Labirintho, Porto, Portugal, 1990 [Unreleased]

Bourbonese Qualk - Live At Rock Rendez-Vous, Lisboa, Portugal, 1987 [Unreleased]

Bushido - Among The Ruins [12"]

Bushido - Deliverance [LP]

Bushido - The Sands Of Nakajima [LP]

Bushido - Voices [12"]

C-Schulz - 10. Hose Horn [LP]

C-Schulz - Party Disco [12"]

Camera Obscura & Die Form - 3 / Final Edition [Cassette]

Chop Shop - Powerdrunk [Cassette]

Chop Shop - Scraps [Cassette]

Chop Shop / Gen-Ken Montgomery - Fragment 4 [Cassette]

City Of Worms - Ashent [Cassette]

City Of Worms - Crumnants [Cassette]

City Of Worms - Easter [Cassette]

City Of Worms - H.C.A. [Cassette]

City Of Worms - Live [Cassette]

City Of Worms - Quester [Cassette]

City Of Worms - Whime [Cassette]

Club Moral - To All Who Are Interested... [LP]

Comando Bruno & Avant-Dernières Pensées - Muestras Sin Valor [LP]

Controlled Bleeding - Body Samples [LP]

Controlled Bleeding - Core [LP]

Controlled Bleeding - Gag [CD]

Controlled Bleeding - Head Chalk [Cassette]

Controlled Bleeding - Headcrack [LP]

Controlled Bleeding - Plegm Bag Spattered [CD]

Controlled Bleeding - Shitslipper [Cassette]

Controlled Bleeding - The Drowning [CD]

Controlled Bleeding - Trailer Fuck [Cassette]

Controlled Bleeding - Trudge [LP]

Controlled Bleeding - Untitled (Le Syndicat) [Cassette]

Controlled Bleeding - Untitled (XXX) [Cassette]

Core - An Area's Era Aria [LP]

Core - Chants Of Race & Emptiness [LP]

Core - My Core [7"]

Cortex - Souvenir / Souvenirs [Cassette]

Cranioclast - A Con Cristal [mLP]

Cranioclast - Can I Talk Or S... [7"]

Cranioclast - Cris Con Tala [Cassette]

Cranioclast - Iconclastar (Icon I-VI) [CD]

Cranioclast - Koitlaransk & Ration Skalk [CD]

Cranioclast - Kolik-San-Art [LP]

Cranioclast - Lost In Karak & Somnii Palus [CD]

Cranioclast - Rats Can Coil Cats Can Roil [12"]

Crash Worship - The Science Of Ecstasy [Cassette]

Crash Worship - This [Cassette]

Crash Worship - Triple Mania II [CD]

Crash Worship - What So Ever Thy Hand Findeth - Do It With All Thine Might [12"]

Crawling With Tarts - Bled Es Siba (1) [Cassette]

Crawling With Tarts - Bled Es Siba (2) [Cassette]

Croiners - Generator Live! 2/24/90 [Cassette]

Croiners - Introspective Retrospective Vol. 1 [Cassette]

Croiners - Music To Listen To Other Tapes By [Cassette]

Croiners - The Relentless Rhythm Of Change [Cassette]

Croiners - Where Did The Watermelon Come From? [Cassette]

Das Synthetische Mischgewebe - Inventaire & Contradictions - Retrospective 1982-1988 [LP]

Das Synthetische Mischgewebe - The Harvest Of Magnetism [LP]

Das Synthetische Mischgewebe - To Share With, What Is To Hear Devided [2 x Cassette]

DDAA - Action And Japanese Demonstration [LP]

DDAA - Concert Plasmatique [Unreleased]

DDAA - En Concert [Cassette]

DDAA - La Famille Des Saltimbanques [Cassette]

DDAA - Lernen 5 Submusic [Cassette]

DDAA - Les Ambulants [LP]

DDAA - Live In Acapulco [2 x Cassette]

DDAA - Live In Acapulco [2 x Cassette] Update

DDAA - Miss Vandann [7"]

DDAA - Nouveaux Bouinages Sonores (Dans La Période) [CD]

DDAA - Nouveaux Bouinages Sonores (Dans La Période) [CD]

DDAA - Prehistoric Rejet [Cassette]

DDAA - Ronsard [LP + 7" + Cassette]

DDAA / Hirsch Quadrat - Split Single [7"]

De Fabriek & Telepherique - PWZ [LP]

De Fabriek - Labish Intermediaries [LP]

De Fabriek - Made In Spain [LP]

De Fabriek - Save The Planet [CD]

De Fabriek - Schafttijdsamba [LP]

De Fabriek - Tempest [LP]

Delayer - Breath By Breath By Breathing [CD]

Denier Du Culte - L'Archange Enflammé [CD]

Denier Du Culte - Mission Dans Le Néant / L'Appel [Cassette]

Deux Pingouins - Animal Mal [Cassette]

Diamanda Galas - Faust Eros Tod [LP]

Die Form & DZ Lectric - Flexible Music Vol. 1 [Cassette]

Die Form - Du Coeur Humain [Cassette]

Die Form - Es Lebe Der Tod [Cassette]

Die Form - Excisions [Cassette]

Die Form - Le Plomb Des Cartes / La Loge Infernale [Cassette]

Die Form / Asmus Tietchens - Face To Face Vol. 1 [LP]

Die Form Sadist School - Les Cent Vingt Journées De Sodome [LP]

Die Klopferbande - ... Und Doch So Bezaubernd [LP]

Die Klopferbande - Die Fliegen [Cassette]

Die Klopferbande - Die Fliegen [CDr]

die Tiger Comics Group - Things We Do ! [LP]

Diseño Corbusier - El Alma De La Estrella [LP]

Diseño Corbusier - Pérfido Encanto [LP]

Dreaming Together - 4 Edens And A World Of Shells [LP]

DZ Lectric & Anthon Shield - Confessions D’Un Masque [Cassette]

DZ Lectric & Anthon Shield - Garçons Oubliés [Cassette]

DZ Lectric & Anthon Shield - Les Chants De La Nuit [Cassette]

DZ Lectric & Anthon Shield - Philosophies [Cassette]

DZ Lectric & Arnovah - Fécondation Sonique [Cassette]

DZ Lectric - Be Eclectic ! [LP]

DZ Lectric - Le Moine [Cassette]

DZ Lectric - Tentatives [Cassette]

Electro Static Cat - Dysteleology [LP]

Empirical Sleeping Consort - Aegri Somnia Vana [LP]

Empirical Sleeping Consort - I've Got Tears In My Ears From Lying On My Back Catatoning Over You, Dear [CD]

Empirical Sleeping Consort - The Layers Of Awakening [CD]

End Of Data - Sahrah [LP]

Eric Lunde - Aztalan / Camp Douglas Quadrangle [7"]

Eric Lunde - N3845 W10452.5/7.5 [2 x 7"]

Eric Lunde - Witness To Disaster [LP]

Eric Lunde - XCHdX: On The Terrain Of Prophecy [LP]

Eric Lunde / Hands To - Tape Death Cut / Vinhilation [LP]

Etant Donnés - Aurore [CD]

Etant Donnés - Bleu [CD]

Etant Donnés - Ceux Que J'Aime, Ce Que Je Hais [Cassette]

Etant Donnés - El Carro [7"]

Etant Donnés - L'Eclipse [Cassette]

Etant Donnés - La Vue [Cassette]

Etant Donnés - Le Sens Positif [LP]

Etant Donnés - Plutôt L'Exil Du Cinq Doré [7"]

Etant Donnés - Royaume [CD]

Etant Donnés - Wonderland [mCD]

F.A.R. Prosthesis - Lust [Cassette]

F:A.R. - Da Consumarsi Con Grazia [LP]

F:A.R. - Passi Uguali [LP]

F:A.R. - Presto I Topi Verranno A Cercarci [LP]

Fetisch Park - Ego Ex Nihil [CD]

Fetisch Park - Trost (Comfort) [CD]

Fetisch Park - Zungenpflug [CD]

Fine AutomatiC & Die Form - ORGASMechanism [Cassette]

Fine AutomatiC & Die Form - Untitled [Cassette]

Fra Lippo Lippi - In Silence [LP]

Fra Lippo Lippi - Untitled [7"]

Frank Dommert & Marcus Schmickler - Nach Schweiz [Cassette]

Frank Dommert - Kiefermusik [LP]

G*Park - Seismogramm [LP]

German Shepherds - I Adore You [7"]

German Shepherds - Music For Sick Queers [LP]

Giancarlo Toniutti - La Mutazione [LP]

Gregory Whitehead - Beyond The Pleasure Principle [Cassette]

Gregory Whitehead - Disorder Speech [Cassette]

Gregory Whitehead - Display Wounds [Cassette]

Gregory Whitehead - Lovely Ways To Burn [Cassette]

Gregory Whitehead - Phantom Pain [Cassette]

Gregory Whitehead - Reptiles And Wildfire [Cassette]

Gregory Whitehead - The Pleasure Of Ruins [Cassette]

Gregory Whitehead - The Respirator And Other Outcasts [Cassette]

Gregory Whitehead - Writing On Air [Cassette]

H.N.A.S. - Ach, Dieser Bart! [LP]

H.N.A.S. - Bitte Werfen Sie Ihren Müll Aus Dem Fenster [LP]

H.N.A.S. - Die Drehorgel Als Feuerspritze [Cassette]

H.N.A.S. - Die Versuchung Des Metzgers [Cassette]

H.N.A.S. - Ich Kannte Einen Gummibaum [Cassette]

H.N.A.S. - Im Schatten Der Möhre [CD]

H.N.A.S. - Küttel Im Frost [LP]

H.N.A.S. - Live In Husum 24.05.1986 [CDr]

H.N.A.S. - Lottoglück Unt [Cassette]

H.N.A.S. - Melchior [LP]

H.N.A.S. - Musik Für Schuhgeschäfte [CD]

H.N.A.S. - Puppe Oder Girl? [Cassette]

H.N.A.S. - Runter Da, Zimtsterne Und Baghwan Jünger [Cassette]

H.N.A.S. - The Book Of Dingenskirchen [CD]

H.N.A.S. - The Humour And Wit Of... [Cassette]

H.N.A.S. - Willkür Nach Noten [CD]

H.N.A.S. / Mieses Gegonge - Abwassermusik [CD]

H.N.A.S. / Mieses Gegonge - Abwassermusik [LP]

Hajsch - Nagual [LP]

Hands To - Artiment [2 x Cassette]

Hands To - Recast [Cassette]

Hands To - Scrine [Cassette]

Hands To - Turn Back To The Sun [Cassette]

Hands To / Kapotte Muziek / Merzbow / PBK / S.B.O.T.H.I. / Das Synthetische Mischgewebe - Rework / Odiom [Cassette]

Het Zweet - Fase [Cassette]

Het Zweet - Het Zweet [LP]

Het Zweet - Massive Trance [Cassette]

Het Zweet - Zweepslag [Cassette]

Human Flesh - The 35th Human Attempt [LP]

Human Flesh - The Third Human Attempt [Cassette]

Hunting Lodge - Exhumed [Cassette]

Hybryds - Music For Rituals [CD]

Hybryds - The Ritual Should Be Kept Alive (Part 1) [mCD]

Hybryds - The Ritual Should Be Kept Alive (Part 2) [CD]

I Scream - Tomorrow Is Another Day [Cassette]

If, Bwana - Wah Yu Wan [LP]

Illusion Of Safety & City Of Worms & Eric Lunde - Milago - Live In Milwaukee & Chicago July 1989 [Cassette]

Illusion Of Safety - Ecstatic Crisis [Cassette]

Illusion Of Safety - Finance & Ideology [Cassette]

Illusion Of Safety - Finite Material Context [2 x Cassette]

Illusion Of Safety - In 70 Countries [Cassette]

Illusion Of Safety - Live Sound Of IOS Post Effects [Cassette]

Illusion Of Safety - More Altitude Than Attitude [Cassette]

Illusion Of Safety - My Mind Is Killing Me [Cassette]

Illusion Of Safety - Violence And Geography [Cassette]

IOSS - Junky On Hiss Snag [Cassette]

IOSS - Mama - Study Of A Human Tongue [Cassette]

IOSS - Yes Yes Oh Yes [Cassette]

Jeff Greinke - Cities In Fog [LP]

Jeff Greinke - Places Of Motility [LP]

Jim O'Rourke - It Takes Time To Do Nothing [Cassette]

Jim O'Rourke - Remove The Need [Cassette]

Jim O'Rourke - Some Kind Of Pagan [Cassette]

Jim O'Rourke - The Ground Below Above Our Heads [LP]

Kallabris - 81° n.B., 178° ö.L. [7"]

Kallabris - A Smile For Brandon [Cassette]

Kallabris - Considération Sur / Sous Le Café [7"]

Kallabris - Hafalgar [10"]

Kallabris - Njonto [LP]

Kallabris - Untitled [LP]

Kallabris – Shanghai [12"]

Klinik - Walking With Shadows [mLP]

Klinik / De Fabriek - Attentie [LP]

Krylon Hertz - Krylon Hertz Vol.1 [Cassette]

Krylon Hertz - Smuggle Death [Cassette]

L'Akstremaunçió - Pogrom A Aschkenas [Cassette]

La Nomenklatur - La Légende Des Voix [Cassette]

La Nomenklatur / Dva Met Dva Nichts - L'Apparition / Hitsig [Cassette]

Laibach - Ein Schauspieler [Cassette]

Laibach - Live In V2 [Cassette]

Laibach - Through The Occupied Netherlands [Cassette]

Laibach / Last Few Days - Untitled [Cassette]

Last Few Days - Pure Spirit And Saliva Live [LP]

Last Few Days - So The Last Shall Be First And The First Last For Many Be Called But Few Chosen [Cassette]

Last Few Days - Too Much Is Not Enough [12"]

Le Syndicat - L'Arme De Force [Cassette]

Le Syndicat - Rectitude [Cassette]

Le Syndicat - Sardanapale [CD]

Le Syndicat - Vagynaestetatis [Cassette]

Le Syndicat - Vagynaestetatis [Cassette]

Lieutenant Caramel - Et Sonner Les Coucous [CD]

Lieutenant Caramel - J'ai 10 Doigts [CD]

Lieutenant Caramel - La Boite De Pandore [LP]

Lieutenant Caramel - Untitled [CD]

Lieutenant Caramel / La Sonorité Jaune - Je Ne Veux Plus Voir Le Ciel [LP]

Luciano Dari - Idrogeni Superiori / Wajd [Cassette]

Lydia Lunch / Michael Gira - Hard Rock [Cassette]

L’Éponge Synthétique - Neiges Et Amours Romantiques [Cassette]

Mandible Chatter - Drinking Out The Hourglass [CD]

Mandible Chatter - Hair Hair Lock & Lore [CD]

Massimo Toniutti - Cava XI.XI.86 [Cassette]

Massimo Toniutti - Il Museo Selvatico [LP]

Massimo Toniutti - Km. Piccolo Cardine [cassette]

Mecano - Autoportrait [LP]

Mecano - Subtitled [LP]

Mental Anguish / Hands To - Orange Is For Anguish, Blue For Insanity / Myasic [LP]

Merzbow + S·Core - A Collaboration Tape [Cassette]

Michael Prime - Fructification [LP]

Minimal Man - Hunger Is All She Has Ever Known [LP]

Minimal Man - Pure [LP]

Minimal Man - Safari [LP]

Minimal Man - Sex With God [LP]

Minimal Man - Slave Lullabyes [LP]

Minoy - Pretty Young Negro Man [Cassette]

Mother Tongue - Open In Obscurity [LP]

No Unauthorized - Invasion [Cassette]

No Unauthorized - Réincarnation [Cassette]

Nox - Killin' Drive Power [CD]

O Yuki Conjugate - Primitive [CD]

O Yuki Conjugate - Scene In Mirage / Soundtracks [Cassette]

O Yuki Conjugate - Undercurrents [CD]

P. Children - Documentation 1987-1992 [CD]

P. Children - P. CH 2 [7"]

P. Children - P. CH 4 [10"]

P.D. - Alltag [7"]

P.D. - Inweglos [LP]

P16.D4 & S.B.O.T.H.I. - Nichts Niemand Nirgends Nie! [2 x LP]

P16.D4 - Acrid Acme (Of) P16.D4 [CD]

P16.D4 - Distruct [CD]

P16.D4 - Kühe In 1/2 Trauer [CD]

Pacific 231 & Vox Populi! - Cthulhu Revisitation [CD]

Pacific 231 - Sachlichkeit [Cassette]

Pacific 231 - Unusual Perversions [LP]

Pacific 231 / Berlinerluft - Nuit Et Brouillard [Cassette]

Pacific 231 / Denier Du Culte - Untitled [LP]

PBK & City Of Worms & Hudak & Illusion Of Safety - Step Into The Step [Cassette]

PBK & Vidna Obmana - Depression And Ideal [Cassette]

PBK - A Noise Supreme, Early Solo Works 1986-89 [CDr]

PBK - Macrophage / The Toil And The Reap [CD]

PBK - Narcosis [Cassette]

Permutative Distorsion - Brückenkopf Im Niemandsland [7"]

Permutative Distorsion - Brückenkopf Im Niemandsland [Cassette]

PFN - Akasa [LP]

Pierre Perret - Gaïa La Terre [Cassette]

Pseudo Code - Europa [LP]

Pseudo Code - Moon Effect [7"]

Pseudo Code - Potlatch Music Vol. 1 [Cassette]

Ptôse - A Paraître [Cassette]

Ptôse - Face De Crabe [LP]

Ptôse - Hand-Made Electronics [Cassette]

Ptôse - Ignobles Limaces [LP]

Ptôse - The Swoop [12"]

Ptôse Production - Moxisylyte N [Cassette]

Ptôse Production - Poisson Soluble [Cassette]

R.I.G. / Holeist - Forced Cohesion [Cassette]

Raksha Mancham - Chös Khor [CD]

Raksha Mancham - Ghazels [CD]

Raksha Mancham - Phyidar [CD]

Raksha Mancham - sBas Yul [CD]

Randy Greif & Dan Burke - Fragment 56 [CD]

Randy Greif - Bacteria And Gravity [LP]

Randy Greif - Golden Joy Club [Cassette]

Randy Greif - Lost Contact [Cassette]

Randy Greif - The Shadow Traders [Cassette]

Ron Anderson - Fever Dream [LP]

S.B.O.T.H.I. - and [LP]

S.B.O.T.H.I. - Brakes 'N' Mistakes [Cassette]

S.B.O.T.H.I. - Can The Sound Change - The Change Can Sound [LP]

S.B.O.T.H.I. - Oroko Do [Cassette]

S.B.O.T.H.I. - Swimming Behavior Of The Human Infant [LP]

Slap - Bed Of Nails [CD]

Small Cruel Party - 3 x 10" [10"]

Small Cruel Party - 6 x 7" Records [7"]

Small Cruel Party - Before The Dream [7"]

Small Cruel Party - Three Simple Eyes of the Insect Ancestor [Cassette]

Small Cruel Party - Unroof The House Of The Fishes [Cassette]

Smersh - A Murder Of Crows [Cassette]

Smersh - Emmanuelle Goes To Bangkok [CD]

Smersh - Gash [Cassette]

Smersh - Hothouse Body In A Cool Culture [Cassette]

Smersh - Ordinary People [Cassette]

Smersh - The Beat From 20,000 Fathoms [LP]

Smersh - The Part Of The Animal That People Don't Like [LP]

Spina Bifida - Statues D'Ébène [12"]

Stenka Bazin - A Sacris [Cassette]

Stenka Bazin - Survie [Cassette]

Steve Moore - A Quiet Gathering [LP]

Steve Moore - The Return Of The Poet [Cassette]

Steve Moore - The Threshold Of Liberty [Cassette]

S·Core - A Great Lump [Cassette] + A Jest Of Nature [7"]

S·

How did anyone think of all this sick perverted--stuff?

I can't speak (publically)--

I'm held prisoner by an--unusually--Dissapproving Rabbit.

I love her--& this video

so much fun

FUN

(music doesn't really work as well without a great dancer--or it's better with it)

"a record for the girls taking over the world"

is NOT the picture of the changing world--worldwide--that is depicted in "Literotica." "Lit." does NOT match with changing and already happening changes between gender relations between males and females, males males, females, females, etc.

"Lit." is not up with gender relations now.

"What do we ... want ... we want the world."

I say won the world--

win the world

Girls

I've seen this before--but I forgot the ho ending--

this was just a little game we were playing to turn you on--

get you all hot--

ruins the entire thing--(maybe I misinterpreted it? Don't think so--)

J. Cash and June Carter are more equals singing "Darling Companion" at San Quentin than this Beyonce faux "world take-over." Just degrades girls. (We're just little kitties tryin to git you riled up--)

Don't take us seriously--we're just--girls, i.e, ...... other groups of non-real-humans--

from "Darling Companion"

that made me believe he might be a "closeted" homosexual... A lot of things ...

1) His feeling the need to put down, belittle women--why did he feel the need to do this? His stating that he'd tried to turn a number of "lesbians" into "straight" women--i.e., make them/us submit to male dominance--why should we? We will win in the end--

2) We will win in the end, and are already winning--gently dry the tears rolling down Buk's cheeks--"it's all over now, Baby Blu"

3) you (Buk) know what to say here, what you really wanted to be, to have done to you--

if someone's a very good writer/ poet if they're biased, (not too)--racist, homophobic, etc. Sexist.

(I feel like a "Sunday School" teacher--

I'm sure W. P., as an editor, would have been very aware of this--)

It's the "romantic" view, I guess-- "behaving's" never resulted in real writing--

telling "the truth" about yourself) hasn't either--yeah--I'm sure there are rare exceptions--

i.e., the more "moral" and ... the less a person can write--

your facade is interesting, how you try to keep stuff from

humiliating you--

Buk. was good--I think--at his facades.

I'm better than he was. Which isn't saying much--

Actually, it's saying a lot.

C. B. kept his heterosexual male image (even macho image) for a reason.

I'm better than he ever was--a lot of women are--and WE ARE WOMEN.

" I have done what you wanted to do, Walt Whitman,

Allen Ginsberg, I have done this thing,

I and the other women this exceptional

act with the exceptional heroic body,

this giving birth, this glistening verb,

and I am putting my proud American boast

right here with the others."

Is up with the comments for this story?

My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun (Sonnet 130)

by William Shakespeare

My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun;

Coral is far more red than her lips' red;

If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;

If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.

I have seen roses damasked, red and white,

But no such roses see I in her cheeks;

And in some perfumes is there more delight

Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.

I love to hear her speak, yet well I know

That music hath a far more pleasing sound;

I grant I never saw a goddess go;

My mistress when she walks treads on the ground.

And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare

As any she belied with false compare.

(I couldn't have said it better.)

no matter what he wrote (no, that's not right--at all)--

I just love him

--after all--Bukowski loved Carson McCullers

they will be together in heaven

B: This is heaven, isn't it?

C: That doesn't sound like a "Bukowski" --question? Ummmmmmmmmm--do you ask questions? Do you ask questions to women?

B: You don't sound right, either. You don't sound like Carson. She wouldn't have said the above. She was never "seductive." In a way that didn't matter.

She was never seductive in a way that didn't matter.

I understood her.

"Hypnotize U," by N.E.R.D.--

"I like you--you're so special." (Or is it, "I'm so special"?)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhFnFBkcGAY

"Girl if you're lost, you know I'll find you (out)...

I can make your storm feel sky blue ... "

(Are only gay males supposed to like this? The end word above is "GAY." What do women/girls get: pity that they're not male?)

"Just close your eyes--"

Realization that males don't want females--only other females do--20s, 50s, 5s, 10s, 20s, 50's, 5's, 10's ... )

An aside: Most females can't compete with what males together can be ok about and comfortable about doing to/with each other--WE'RE NOT JOCKS.

and let's just leave it this way--males can have a sense of equality between themselves ( plus dominance over females) that females with males can NEVER have with males--

This has been going on since time began and males discovered that the prisons they forced females into made sex not fun for them--the males--but they had to have control over "fatherhood."

Women were kept in ignorance. While males carried on sexual relationships (with freedoms females would never have been allowed to even imagine--and even if they did imagine such, do you think any sane woman would want a male to do these things to her?) with other men. (Women, of course, were so blind-sided they most often didn't even think they could have been doing the same thing with their girlfriends.)

Females have been and are the butt of misogynistic jokes--"They don't have a clue. That we love and fuck men and only put up with females to keep our respectability. They--females--are so pitiable. And beyond our contempt. If it were't for "Christianity,"

we'd kick females off the planet."

(If they could, before we ...)

And females' sexual conditioning was so--VERY LESS FREE--How MANY WOULD EVEN HAVE THOUGHT I could do better without men. Even thought they've intentionally stacked everything against me.

For their benefit. Pay us barely survival income and try to force us to marry males--we can legally rape them any way we want--

we can write porn that makes them so far below "sub-human"

links to stuff I find sexy and very funny--so it goes with just about anything in "Lit."--

* for --

**************************http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2wqmGu1EY8 (N.E.R.D.--"All the girls standing in the line for the bath room"--'just wanna dance in your reckless path'-- the girl w/ the dark curly hair "showcased" is so adorable--oh, the the guys dancing--)

********************David Mamet--" ... I started to put them all together and they spelled 'mother.'" (Why he left the left:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLQY19QumUc [very funny])

******************"Jizz in My Pants"-- Lonely Island--"...to be fair you were flirting a lot/plus the way you bagged cans got me bothered and hot"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLnWf1sQkjY

*********"Wrong Hole" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zHVW7Zy_vg

That's what these links are SUPPOSED to be for--

"I Ain't Goin' Nowhere"--Rick Moranis (Agoraphobic Cowboy)--

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8OeCacs5oqM

(Why aren't there ever--that I know of--women revealing their "secrets" of wanting to absolutely dominate their partner--if male--for revenge? I.e., "the cruel woman.")*

http://knoworthy.com/lady-love-the-secret-fantasies-of-a-young-passive-woman/?utm_source=o_fo&utm_campaign=lady-love-the-secret-fan-1542

*I'm not a cruel woman, but--if I were ashamed of feeling "passive"-- I could hide behind a/my "cruel woman" mask!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then no one would ever know my shame.

I'd have a double life, like a spy! (And--it's true--lots of men like cruel women. So one could pretend--)

cowardly. That's how I feel about it and I'm telling the truth.

I'm sick of all this bullshit that acts like you're not "really a woman" if you don't want to be "dominated."

Maybe all black people should want to be "dominated," too? It must be--NATURAL.

(I don't think wanting to be dominated is "natural" for anyone. But if you are in an inescapable state of being dominated, not free, I'm sure there will be, always have been people who will tell you that you are "normal" if you have a desire to be in the enforced state you are in. The people who rule over you feel that it is natural that they do so, and that, therefore, projecting, it is "natural" that "you" want to obey, be dominated and ruled by the people who have power over you.

I think this old view is basically obsolete when it comes to race. But that there's some "supernatural" belief that it's Different between men and women. That "God" intended it this way.

No--women REALLY DO want to be dominated! It explains rape, incest, battering, everything!

No we don't want this. The above. At least, I don't.

" ... [we like] champagne, caviar ... all them good things!" (Paraphrased. From--you must know where, who, and what.)

"Yes, how sweet!" j. cash

"It's like apple pie. I cut you open and you're just wired ... who'd say no to you ..."

N.E.R.D. (Everyone Nose)

"Here's a towel, wipe your face, cool it down." (N.E.R.D.)

Sometimes you think of things and you write them to someone (there's no one in Iowa City I feel I could talk to about anything "real" to--the "liberals" I met when I first moved here, at the Episcopal church--they said all the right things--while kneeling and--if you were "upper class"--sorry, that's how I took it--the Creed (which no one professed to really believe in--oh, to get back to the topic--some people knew it by 'heart"--they'd never heard of this low-class Southern term--I was a "red-neck," from Memphis, so I couldn't recite this "creed" by heart.

(But my toddler son was walking around Troy, NY, quoting "and woman wailing for her demon lover"--which I recited to him--i was a good mum in poetry.)

Anyway--in Memphis when I loved a black woman who was (much?) more--androgynous? gently dominate? than I was/am--white "lesbians"--here today, gone yesterday--criticized me for having a "butch"? lover? "We don't believe in playing roles."

They did have more "feminine, i.e., white?" lovers. Again, I'd made a faux paw. It wasn't enough to be calling oneself a "lesbian," you had to be the right kind of "lesbian."

It was racism. But I couldn't sort all this stuff out then. That a lot of black women had less--inhibited?--submissive? personalities than white--especially, Southern white "lesbians"--with everyone stoned (& a lot from "liberal arts" programs) who could tell?

"But you liked a woman who had more "masculine" qualities than a lot of (white?) women. YOU WANTED A BUTCH.

I saw you melt into her arms on the dance floor.

You melted. She was steadfast. The two of you were supporting sexism. And homophobia. Come again?

were being very racist--but I don't believe they knew this. And no wonder.

There were all these categories--of political groups. Often mutually exculsive.

We're looking at sex roles and feminism. NOT ways race affects gender, sex roles.

The woman you're so very attracted to acts--"masculine,"--by our standards (white, feminist, liberal/ liberal arts--pretentious)--

She acts "masculine," you want to--yield?--at best--to her--

WE DISAPPROVE.

(We're looking at sex roles as we know them, as white "liberal" women. You're attracted to the "wrong kind" of woman.

A "masculine" woman. This is sexist. This kind of so-called lesbian is NOT ALLOWED.

Finally. Bright idea: What if it was S/M?

Well. Now. That's different. You'd be in a protected group.

[But she's not sadistic, cruel, hurtful at all.])

I'll go on."

I guess I am." (her)

(him)--"I don't think age is the disqualifying feature in your case ... 'Other things, Michaeleen, other things ... "

(Know this movie--the quote? Of course you do.)

then, ok. I believe it. But knowing who says something makes a difference.

And if you have to know who says something, whether or not you trust them, then is the reader really responding to the satire/parody?

Or thinking, it's ok. I know this writer is a good person. So it's satire. Parody.

I have written--satire &/ or parody--I think.

(I've written about this before somewhere. It was a thing about nuns and priests. So, is "Story of O" satire, parody? De Sade's stuff? It's funny--but I can't tell for sure. Is that the idea about satire? You can't tell for sure?)

Joke--Why would anyone be a masochist?

Beats me.

Besides. I hid real thoughts beneath my (nun's) costume of satire, parody. Things I was ashamed of.

Does satire, parody necessarily involve subterfuge? (Only if you're me. And it's so fun.)

I always? wanted to do--unusual--things. Not in real life, actually. But to not just read stories, but be in them. The stories.

Actually, actually acting out stories goes too far for me. I think. How do I know?

Something in between.

(I got this person's satire wrong. I think. How do I know? I don't know anything. How can I?)

Actually, acting out stories is perfect. You're framed. You're safe inside the frame. Like a sonnet. (No one can say "This is You." And thereby humiliate you. [You were seen naked. Worse--no one wanted to see you naked. But--you didn't want anyone to see you naked, either. You're butt was supposed to be covered. By satire. There was a {Freudian} slip.])

Unless I know who's talking, I'm not sure I can tell--you might say this is absurd. But absurd stuff is said all the time and meant seriously.

No wonder people want to be anonymous. They might be misunderstood.

Perfect (and I've experienced it in my poem "Pietas"). To be disguised and simultaneously say publically something you don't want anyone to see--hint: it's non-violent. Unless accidental biting happens.

Then of course you don't care about that particular thing anymore.

I've been fortunate in finding a number of men who enjoy being spanked.

I don't leave marks on their bodies.

It's symbolic. Or metaphoric.

Or--whatever.

oh girls just wanna have fun.

Have fun.

Oh mother dear, we're not the fortunate ones. And girls they wanna have fun."

We're not the fortunate ones.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7uC5m-IRns

(Everything I copy & paste--doesn't work right. For sum reason. The Polish vodka? It's gluten-free.)

by "Question Mark & The Mysterians"

"And you'll start crying

96 tears--"

I notice women who write in the "Daily Iowan"--the Opinion pages and The Ledge.

"You've got a way to keep me on your side ...

for you I'd even try to turn the tide ..."

Even though I've often commented on male writers more (1 or--2? times). Sometimes the guy wrote more like me--I think. (I.e., vanity)

"I keep you on my mind ..."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T7zSstHWRAs

(The above's SUPPOSED to be J. Cash at San Quentin--"I Walk the Line.")

I mean when it happens to be a male writer who "excessively" uses parenthetical (sp?) expressions, AS I DO--I have to NOTICE. And--even though I AM female, I think, my god, this human's a--GENIUS!

I mean some men write sorta like me--and I can't help but like it. That--as they say in some parts of the South--"we favor."

I don't think--I'm not sure--

but this article in The Daily Iowan, today, "Prejudice on the library selves," by one "Mike Beall," has me feeling like Carl Jung.

(He loved humanity but couldn't get along with anybody.)

Women writers--so many of them/us--"give me cause for love that I can't hide."

or I wouldn't

think females are so important--

we're very important

http://www.jofreeman.com/joreen/trashing.htm

(Everybody's talking about you. Every word's a whisper without you ...

forget about it honey ...)

TRASHING: The Dark Side of Sisterhood

by Joreen

This article was written for Ms. magazine and published in the April 1976 issue, pp. 49-51, 92-98. It evoked more letters from readers than any article previously published in Ms., all but a few relating their own experiences of being trashed. Quite a few of these were published in a subsequent issue of Ms.

It's been a long time since I was trashed. I was one of the first in the country, perhaps the first in Chicago, to have my character, my commitment, and my very self attacked in such a way by Movement women that it left me torn in little pieces and unable to function. It took me years to recover, and even today the wounds have not entirely healed. Thus I hang around the fringes of the Movement, feeding off it because I need it, but too fearful to plunge once more into its midst. I don't even know what I am afraid of. I keep telling myself there's no reason why it should happen again -- if I am cautious -- yet in the back of my head there is a pervasive, irrational certainty that says if I stick my neck out, it will once again be a lightning rod for hostility. For years I have written this spiel in my head, usually as a speech for a variety of imaginary Movement audiences. But I have never thought to express myself on it publicly because I have been a firm believer in not washing the Movement's dirty linen in public. I am beginning to change my mind.

First of all, so much dirty linen is being publicly exposed that I doubt that what I have to reveal will add much to the pile. To those women who have been active in the Movement, it is not even a revelation. Second, I have been watching for years with increasing dismay as the Movement consciously destroys anyone within it who stands out in any way. I had long hoped that this self-destructive tendency would wither away with time and experience. Thus I sympathized with, supported, but did not speak out about, the many women whose talents have been lost to the Movement because their attempts to use them had been met with hostility. Conversations with friends in Boston, Los Angeles, and Berkeley who have been trashed as recently as 1975 have convinced me that the Movement has not learned from its unexamined experience Instead, trashing has reached epidemic proportions. Perhaps taking it out of the closet will clear the air.

What is "trashing," this colloquial term that expresses so much, yet explains so little? It is not disagreement; it is not conflict; it is not opposition. These are perfectly ordinary phenomena which, when engaged in mutually, honestly, and not excessively, are necessary to keep an organism or organization healthy and active. Trashing is a particularly vicious form of character assassination which amounts to psychological rape. It is manipulative, dishonest, and excessive. It is occasionally disguised by the rhetoric of honest conflict, or covered up by denying that any disapproval exists at all. But it is not done to expose disagreements or resolve differences. It is done to disparage and destroy.

The means vary. Trashing can be done privately or in a group situation; to one's face or behind one's back; through ostracism or open denunciation. The trasher may give you false reports of what (horrible things) others think of you; tell your friends false stories of what you think of them; interpret whatever you say or do in the most negative light; project unrealistic expectations on you so that when you fail to meet them, you become a "legitimate" target for anger; deny your perceptions of reality; or pretend you don't exist at all. Trashing may even be thinly veiled by the newest group techniques of criticism/self-criticism, mediation, and therapy. Whatever methods are used, trashing involves a violation of one's integrity, a declaration of one's worthlessness, and an impugning of one's motives In effect, what is attacked is not one's actions, or one's ideas, but one's self.

This attack is accomplished by making you feel that your very existence is inimical to the Movement and that nothing can change this short of ceasing to exist. These feelings are reinforced when you are isolated from your friends as they become convinced that their association with-you is similarly inimical to the Movement and to themselves. Any support of you will taint them. Eventually all your colleagues join in a chorus of condemnation which cannot be silenced, and you are reduced to a mere parody of your previous self.

It took three trashings to convince me to drop out. Finally, at the end of 1969, I felt psychologically mangled to the point where I knew I couldn't go on. Until then I interpreted my experiences as due to personality conflicts or political disagreements which I could rectify with time and effort. But the harder I tried, the worse things got, until I was finally forced to face the incomprehensible reality that the problem was not what I did, but what I was.

This was communicated so subtly that I never could get anyone to talk about it. There were no big confrontations, just many little slights. Each by itself was insignificant; but added one to another they were like a thousand cuts with a whip. Step by step I was ostracized: if a collective article was written, my attempts to contribute were ignored; if I wrote an article, no one would read it; when I spoke in meetings, everyone would listen politely, and then take up the discussion as though I hadn't said anything; meeting dates were changed without my being told; when it was my turn to coordinate a work project, no one would help; when I didn't receive mailings, and discovered that my name was not on the mailing list, I was told I had just looked in the wrong place. My group once decided on joint fund-raising efforts to send people to a conference until I said I wanted to go, and then it was decided that everyone was on her own (in fairness, one member did call me afterward to contribute $5 to my fare, provided that I not tell anyone. She was trashed a few years later).

My response to this was bewilderment. I felt as though I were wandering blindfolded in a field I full of sharp objects and deep holes while being reassured that I could see perfectly and was in a smooth, grassy pasture. It was is if I had unwittingly entered a new society, one operating by rules of which I wasn't aware, and couldn't know. When I tried to get my group(s) to discuss what I thought was happening to me, they either denied my perception of reality by saying nothing was out of the ordinary, or dismissed the incidents as trivial (which individually they were). One woman, in private phone conversations, did admit that I was being poorly treated. But she never supported me publicly, and admitted quite frankly that it was because she feared to lose the group's approval. She too was trashed in another group.

Month after month the message was pounded in: get out, the Movement was saying: Get Out, Get Out! One day I found myself confessing to my roommate that I didn't think I existed; that I was a figment of my own imagination. That's when I knew it was time to leave. My departure was very quiet. I told two people, and stopped going to the Women's Center. The response convinced me that I had read the message correctly. No one called, no one sent me any mailings, no reaction came back through the grapevine. Half my life had been voided, and no one was aware of it but me. Three months later word drifted back that I had been denounced by the Chicago Women's Liberation Union, founded after I dropped out of the Movement, for allowing myself to be quoted in a recent news article without their permission. That was all.

The worst of it was that I really didn't know why I was so deeply affected. I had survived growing up in a very conservative, conformist, sexist suburb where my right to my own identity was constantly under assault. The need to defend my right to be myself made me tougher, not tattered. My thickening skin was further annealed by my experiences in other political organizations and movements, where I learned the use of rhetoric and argument as weapons in political struggle, and how to spot personality conflicts masquerading as political ones. Such conflicts were usually articulated impersonally, as attacks on one's ideas, and while they may not have been productive, they were not as destructive as those that I later saw in the feminist movement. One can rethink one's ideas as a result of their being attacked. It's much harder to rethink one's personality. Character assassination was occasionally used, but it was not considered legitimate, and thus was limited in both extent and effectiveness. As people's actions counted more than their personalities, such attacks would not so readily result in isolation. When they were employed, they only rarely got under one's skin.

But the feminist movement got under mine. For the first time in my life, I found myself believing all the horrible things people said about me. When I was treated like shit, I interpreted it to mean that I was shit. My reaction unnerved me as much as my experience. Having survived so much unscathed, why should I now succumb? The answer took me years to arrive at. It is a personally painful one because it admits of a vulnerability I thought I had escaped. I had survived my youth because I had never given anyone or any group the right to judge me. That right I had reserved to myself. But the Movement seduced me by its sweet promise of sisterhood. It claimed to provide a haven from the ravages of a sexist society; a place where one would be understood. it was my very need for feminism and feminists that made me vulnerable. I gave the movement the right to judge me because I trusted it. And when it judged me worthless, I accepted that judgment.

For at least six months I lived in a kind of numb despair, completely internalizing my failure as a personal one. In June, 1970, I found myself in New York coincidentally with several feminists from four different cities. We gathered one night for a general discussion on the state of the Movement, and instead found ourselves discussing what had happened to us. We had two things in common; all of us had Movement-wide reputations, and all had been trashed. Anselma Dell'Olio read us a speech on "Divisiveness and Self-Destruction in the Women's Movement" she had recently given at the Congress To Unite Women (sic) as a result of her own trashing.

"I learned ... years ago that women had always been divided against one another, self-destructive and filled with impotent rage. I thought the Movement would change all that. I never dreamed that I would see the day when this rage, masquerading as a pseudo-egalitarian radicalism [would be used within the Movement to strike down sisters singled out

"I am referring ... to the personal attacks, both overt and insidious, to which women in the Movement who had painfully managed any degree of achievement have been subjected. These attacks take different forms. The most common and pervasive is character assassination: the attempt to undermine and destroy belief in the integrity of the individual under attack. Another form is the 'purge.' The ultimate tactic is to isolate her. . . .

"And who do they attack? Generally two categories. . . Achievement or accomplishment of any kind would seem to be the worst crime: ... do anything . . . that every other woman secretly or otherwise feels she could do just as well -- and ... you're in for it. If then ... you are assertive, have what is generally described as a 'forceful personality/ if ... you do not fit the conventional stereotype of a 'feminine' woman, ... it's all over.

"If you are in the first category (an achiever), You are immediately labeled a thrill-seeking opportunist, a ruthless mercenary, out to make her fame and fortune over the dead bodies of selfless sisters who have buried their abilities and sacrificed their ambitions for the greater glory of Feminism. Productivity seems to be the major crime -- but if you have the misfortune of being outspoken and articulate, you are also accused of being power-mad, elitist, fascist, and finally the worst epithet of all: a male-identifier. Aaaarrrrggg!"

As I listened to her, a great feeling of relief washed over me. It was my experience she was describing. If I was crazy, I wasn't the only one. Our talk continued late into the evening. When we left, we sardonically dubbed ourselves the "feminist refugees" and agreed to meet sometime again. We never did. Instead we each slipped back into our own isolation, and dealt with the problem only on a personal level. The result was that most of the women at that meeting dropped out as I had done. Two ended up in the hospital with nervous breakdowns. Although all remained dedicated feminists, none have really contributed their talents to the Movement as they might have. Though we never met again, our numbers grew as the disease of self-destructiveness slowly engulfed the Movement.

Over the years I have talked with many women who have been trashed. Like a cancer, the attacks spread from those who had reputations to those who were merely strong; from those who were active to those who merely had ideas; from those who stood out as individuals to those who failed to conform rapidly enough to the twists and turns of the changing line. With each new story, my conviction grew that trashing was not an individual problem brought on by individual actions; nor was it a result of political conflicts between those of differing ideas, It was a social disease.

The disease has been ignored so long because it is frequently masked under the rhetoric of sisterhood. In my own case, the ethic of sisterhood prevented a recognition of my ostracism. The new values of the Movement said that every woman was a sister, every woman was acceptable. I clearly was not. Yet no one could admit that I was not acceptable without admitting that they were not being sisters. It was easier to deny the reality of my unacceptability. With other trashings, sisterhood has been used as the knife rather than the cover-up. A vague standard of sisterly behavior is set up by anonymous judges who then condemn those who do not meet their standards. As long as the standard is vague and utopian, it can never be met. But it can be shifted with circumstances to exclude those not desired as sisters. Thus Ti-Grace Atkinson's memorable adage that "sisterhood is powerful: it kills sisters" is reaffirmed again and again.

Trashing is not only destructive to the individuals involved, but serves as a very powerful tool of social control. The qualities and styles which are attacked become examples other women learn not to follow -- lest the same fate befall them. This is not a characteristic peculiar to the Women's Movement, or even to women. The use of social pressures to induce conformity and intolerance for individuality is endemic to American society. The relevant question is not why the Movement exerts such strong pressures to conform to a narrow standard, but what standard does it pressure women to conform to.

This standard is clothed in the rhetoric of revolution and feminism. But underneath are some very traditional ideas about women's proper roles. I have observed that two different types of women are trashed. The first is the one described by Anselma Dell'Olio -- the achiever and/or the assertive woman, the one to whom the epithet "male-identified" is commonly applied. This kind of woman has always been put down by our society with epithets ranging from "unladylike" to "castrating bitch." The primary reason there have been so few "great women ______" is not merely that greatness has been undeveloped or unrecognized, but that women exhibiting potential for achievement are punished by both women and men. The "fear of success" is quite rational when one knows that the consequence of achievement is hostility and not praise.

Not only has the Movement failed to overcome this traditional socialization, but some women have taken it to new extremes. To do something significant, to be recognized, to achieve, is to imply that one is "making it off other women's oppression" or that one thinks oneself better than other women. Though few women may think this, too many remain silent while the others unsheathe their claws. The quest for "leaderlessness" that the Movement so prizes has more frequently become an attempt to tear down those women who show leadership qualities, than to develop such qualities in those who don't. Many women who have tried to share their skills have been trashed for asserting that they know something others don't. The Movement's worship of egalitarianism is so strong that it has become confused with sameness. Women who remind us that we are not all the same are trashed because their differentness is interpreted as meaning we are not all equal.

Consequently the Movement makes the wrong demands from the achievers within it. It asks for guilt and atonement rather than acknowledgment and responsibility. Women who have benefitted personally from the Movement's existence do owe it more than gratitude. But that debt is not called in by trashing. Trashing only discourages other women from trying to break free of their traditional shackles.

The other kind of woman commonly trashed is one I would never have suspected. The values of the Movement favor women who are very supportive and self-effacing; those who are constantly attending to others' personal problems; the women who play the mother role very well. Yet a surprising number of such women have been trashed. Ironically their very ability to play this role is resented and creates an image of power which their associates find threatening. Some older women who consciously reject the mother role are expected to play it because they "look the part" -- and are trashed when they refuse. Other women who willingly play it find they engender expectations which they eventually cannot meet, No one can be "everything to everybody," so when these women find themselves having to say no in order to conserve a little of their own time and energy for themselves or to tend to the political business of a group, they are perceived as rejecting and treated with anger. Real mothers of course can afford some anger from their children because they maintain a high degree of physical and financial control over them. Even women in the "helping" professions occupying surrogate mother roles have resources with which to control their clients' anger. But when one is a "mother" to one's peers, this is not a possibility. If the demands become unrealistic, one either retreats, or is trashed.

The trashing of both these groups has common roots in traditional roles. Among women there are two roles perceived as permissible: the "helper" and the "helped." Most women are trained to act out one or the other at different times. Despite consciousness-raising and an intense scrutiny of our own socialization, many of us have not liberated ourselves from playing these roles, nor from our expectations that others will do so. Those who deviate from these roles -- the achievers -- are punished for doing so, as are those who fail to meet the group's expectations.

Although only a few women actually engage in trashing, the blame for allowing it to continue rests with us all. Once under attack, there is little a woman can do to defend herself because she is by definition always wrong. But there is a great deal that those who are watching can do to prevent her from being isolated and ultimately destroyed. Trashing only works well when its victims are alone, because the essence of trashing is to isolate a person and attribute a group's problems to her. Support from others cracks this facade and deprives the trashers of their audience. It turns a rout into a struggle. Many attacks have been forestalled by the refusal of associates to let themselves be intimidated into silence out of fear that they would be next. Other attackers have been forced to clarify their complaints to the point where they can be rationally dealt with.

There is, of course, a fine line between trashing and political struggle, between character assassination and legitimate objections to undesirable behavior. Discerning the difference takes effort. Here are some pointers to follow. Trashing involves heavy use of the verb "to be" and only a light use of the verb "to do." It is what one is and not what one does that is objected to, and these objections cannot be easily phrased in terms of specific undesirable behaviors. Trashers also tend to use nouns and adjectives of a vague and general sort to express their objections to a particular person. These terms carry a negative connotation, but don't really tell you what's wrong. That is left to your imagination. Those being trashed can do nothing right. Because they are bad, their motives are bad, and hence their actions are always bad. There is no making up for past mistakes, because these are perceived as symptoms and not mistakes.

The acid test, however, comes when one tries to defend a person under attack, especially when she's not there, If such a defense is taken seriously, and some concern expressed for hearing all sides and gathering all evidence, trashing is probably not occurring. But if your defense is dismissed with an oft-hand "How can you defend her?"; if you become tainted with suspicion by attempting such a defense; if she is in fact indefensible, you should take a closer look at those making the accusations. There is more going on than simple disagreement.

As trashing has become more prevalent, I have become more puzzled by the question of why. What is it about the Women's Movement that supports and even encourages self-destruction? How can we on the one hand talk about encouraging women to develop their own individual potential and on the other smash those among us who do just that? Why do we damn our sexist society for the damage it does to women, and then damn those women who do not appear as severely damaged by it? Why has consciousness-raising not raised our consciousness about trashing?

The obvious answer is to root it in our oppression as women, and the group self-hate which results from our being raised to believe that women are not worth very much. Yet such an answer is far too facile; it obscures the fact that trashing does not occur randomly. Not all women or women's organizations trash, at least not to the same extent. It is much more prevalent among those who call themselves radical than among those who don't; among those who stress personal changes than among those who stress institutional ones; among those who can see no victories short of revolution than among those who can be satisfied with smaller successes; and among those in groups with vague goals than those in groups with concrete ones.

I doubt that there is any single explanation to trashing; it is more likely due to varying combinations of circumstances which are not always apparent even to those experiencing them. But from the stories I've heard, and the groups I've watched, what has impressed me most is how traditional it is. There is nothing new about discouraging women from stepping out of place by the use of psychological manipulation. This is one of the things that have kept women down for years; it is one thing that feminism was supposed to liberate us from. Yet, instead of an alternative culture with alternative values, we have created alternative means of enforcing the traditional culture and values. Only the name has changed; the results are the same.

While the tactics are traditional, the virulence is not. I have never seen women get as angry at other women as they do in the Movement. In part this is because our expectations of other feminists and the Movement in general are very high, and thus difficult to meet. We have not yet learned to be realistic in our demands on our sisters or ourselves. It is also because other feminists are available as targets for rage.

Rage is a logical result of oppression. It demands an outlet. Because most women are surrounded by men whom they have learned it is not wise to attack, their rage is often turned inward. The Movement is teaching women to stop this process, but in many instances it has not provided alternative targets. While the men are distant, and the "system" too big and vague, one's "sisters" are close at hand. Attacking other feminists is easier and the results can be more quickly seen than by attacking amorphous social institutions. People are hurt; they leave. One can feel the sense of power that comes from having "done something." Trying to change an entire society is a very slow, frustrating process in which gains are incremental, rewards diffuse, and setbacks frequent. It is not a coincidence that trashing occurs most often and most viciously by those feminists who see the least value in small, impersonal changes and thus often find themselves unable to act against specific institutions.

The Movement's emphasis on "the personal is political" has made it easier for trashing to flourish. We began by deriving some of our political ideas from our analysis of our personal lives. This legitimated for many the idea that the Movement could tell us what kind of people we ought to be, and by extension what kind of personalities we ought to have. As no boundaries were drawn to define the limits of such demands, it was difficult to preclude abuses. Many groups have sought to remold the lives and minds of their members, and some have trashed those who resisted. Trashing is also a way of acting out the competitiveness that pervades our society, but in a manner that reflects the feelings of incompetence that trashers exhibit. Instead of trying to prove one is better than anyone else, one proves someone else is worse. This can provide the same sense of superiority that traditional competition does, but without the risks involved. At best the object of one's ire is put to public shame, at worst one's own position is safe within the shrouds of righteous indignation, Frankly, if we are going to have competition in the Movement, I prefer the old-fashioned kind. Such competitiveness has its costs, but there are also some collective benefits from the achievements the competitors make while trying to outdo each other. With trashing there are no beneficiaries. Ultimately everyone loses.

To support women charged with subverting the Movement or undermining their group takes courage, as it requires us to stick our necks out. But the collective cost of allowing trashing to go on as long and as extensively as we have is enormous. We have already lost some of the most creative minds and dedicated activists in the Movement. More importantly, we have discouraged many feminists from stepping out, out of fear that they, too, would be trashed. We have not provided a supportive environment for everyone to develop their individual potential, or in which to gather strength for the battles with the sexist institutions we must meet each day. A Movement that once burst with energy, enthusiasm, and creativity has become bogged down in basic survival -- survival from each other. Isn't it time we stopped looking for enemies within and began to attack the real enemy without? The author would like to thank Linda, Maxine, and Beverly for their helpful suggestions in the revision of this paper.

(c) Joreen

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who--do something wrong. Wrong for the group they supposedly belong to and to the group/s they don't belong to. "You just can't hardly win, can you?" J. Cash

Richard Rodriguez, for instance, advocates? Rodriguez was born here and hardly knows Spanish and is totally assimilated, the way he wanted to be. Yet if he walks down the street with five hundred "Americans [quotes--mine]," he will still stand out because of the way he looks: Mexican and even Indian Mexican.' .... It's pitiful how the U.S. is obsessed with turning people into a universal Anybody .... there's an injury in exile: you're torn, you're divided, you must choose between several doors. Richard Rodriguez is now an assimilated American, one with Hispanic roots. Jews, on the other hand, are eternal immigrants. Always in the process of assimilating, but hesitating. They are chameleons, salamanders--ever-changing creatures."

from "The Literary Review," vol. 37 No. 1

"All poets are ... " what? Who said that? What woman poet wrote those/ these words?

to assimilate--see Christopher Smart.

But--he did get confined to Bedlam.

(Another inmate even wrote a love pom to him.)

and called my sister to see. Lying on his side,

legs straight out in front, little stomach pulsing.

The head lifted, sideways, and began telling us

how much he hated the promiscuous sun which shines

on all things equally. Rotting one, growing strength

in another. On those caged in virtue and on men who

walk the streets at ease in the hot light.

On that which is not quite animal, on what is not

quite mineral. That which hisses in the shadows

along the wall. Army of horses practicing formations

in the Swiss mountains. Shephards fleeing into Italy.

On the two dead fish on the sidewalk still pink from

their life in the sea. Finally the lamb slept.

The trees on the hills around us were silent.

Inside everything was moving, shivering with wind."

"Children Among The Hills" by Linda Gregg in "Too Bright To See/Alma"

"The man was a stranger ... 'Where you come from?' ....

The hunchback's voice was uncertain. 'I was traveling.'" Carson McCullers in "The Ballad of the Sad Cafe"

"Pass it on: a poet, a woman,

a witness ... " Sharon Olds "Solitary"

(But Beckett said you can't. "I can't go on. I'll go on." And if he said it, then--)

I mean what is literature for?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Public_key

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4um17nllnQ

The Mamas and Papas

"Young girls are coming to the canyon ...

I can't keep myself from talking ..."

in telling yourself all the things you'd miss if you didn't--"... go on." (But what would you do otherwise? Like, as if [as if] you have poison or a gun. I don't have or want either. You'll just have missed an appointment--or two. The Doctor will be/is mad at you. And will charge you for missing the appointment.)

You'll still be alive. As you knew you would be. What choice do you have? None. I don't want any other choice.

More than just "a little" exciting.

Actually, it feels sort of--good--

But there's a lot of mood regulation with this--

Why do you think living is a sign of being ethical? Just curious.

(One reason selfish reason: The alternatives seem VERY painful. I mean as as means to the supposed desired end. And my family would be very, very--unhappy.

And hurt. Very hurt.)

Well they oughta stop trying to make me be good. That's just a lot of stress.

Being alive ought to count for something.

I'm gonna need this to be a whole book please