All Comments on 'The Makings of Ellen Ch. 01'

by dsoul

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  • 27 Comments
m48gunnerm48gunneralmost 13 years ago
Bye Bye Marriate

Well, apparently another marriage down the tubes....I know this is "loving wives" and "interracial" but it is still too bad to see someone throw away a marriage. As a husband I can only hope that in your later chapters there are consequences for her cheating, and a bit of pay back for the husband...probably not as most of these stories always make the white husband a patsy and wimp and the black guy a super stud...but we can hope for a bit of reality in this fantasy, a bit of payback to both of them, a bit of consequences for throwing away a loving marriage and husband for a job and sex.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
abuse

just throw in a banana

Rockyderek_caRockyderek_caalmost 13 years ago
Flawed

The process to principalship, let alone superintendancy is a very transparent and involves interview commities... This plot, albeit a fiction is an untenable situation.

shaman43shaman43almost 13 years ago
Good God

So much is wrong with this story. The comment about promotional transparency in education is so accurate. 150,00 per month far too much. Only supers in very wealthy highly academic districts get that much in a year. Or in extremely large metro districts with difficulties. The sensitivity to sexual harassment issues is greater than in industry and other private areas. None of this flies by the possible realities radar. Then the treatment of the aggressor to someone not into submission yet is over the top. Sooooo bad. A one.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
Wrong catagory

shuld be in interracial. 1 star

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
Shaky Start

m48gunner- where is your wife right now while you're reading Literotica. I imagine that she wouldn't dare do anything w/o your permission if she knows what's good for her. OK- dsoul, you've got a plot that's not bad as far as cheating wives and the sterotypical streetwise black male. You need to work on your grammar especially sentence structure and word usage. A lot of errors there and as others pointed out the reality of some of your facts such as salaries for educational personnel. I went to college and a lot of my colleagues were black and I don't remember any of them acting like this, especially one that went into education and became a "professional". Even though it's fiction the more plausible it is the more the reader can be drawn in and experience your story. Except for 3D of course (that's a joke). Keep trying, ignore the dumb asses and get a good editor that will work with you. Thank you

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago

Should be in either FETISH or IR category.Can't you black/white writers find something NEW to write about? Are so braindead that you can't think of a DIFFERENT plot than this obviously racist bullshit? Black on white can be sexy and erotic but this story? it is just complete and utter Racist bullshit.

NJW7NJW7almost 13 years ago
Nice start

I enjoyed it dsoul; hope to see another chapter soon.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
Well...

I do not read IR stories, but I do look for disrespectful shit like this. Another predatory black man? A black man still has a seventy percent chance of being killed if he knocks up a married white woman. It doesn't have to be the husband either. It could be the father, brother or any other family member including the mother. People still frown on it no matter what the PC people say. Thats why the writer does it here, he is afraid of bullets.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago

I say you write a lettr telling him about how you willingly gave yourself to your blackboss and let him shoot is vilesperm into your skanky cunt, then take a .38m revolver and bow your fucking brains out. That way you poor clueless husband wont feel guilty about your death and you wont embaress him by having a bastard baby

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
To the moron who wrote the last comment...

won't 'bowing her brains out' give her a terrible back ache?

You fucking pea-brained troll...

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
Just another nigger fantasy.

This is as always in the wrong section. puke.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago

Yes you are a pea brain, not the troll YOU you stupid cuckod, wimp cunt.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
keep it strait

150grand a month,1.8 mil a year for a vice.she left the house in jeans and somehow she has a skirt on at the restaurant.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
It's a Story

This story is what cheating wives are all about. In this one, she stupidly, and with no street smarts or common sense, goes to dinner with him, lets him get her a little drunk and with her reflexes down she ends up with him feeling her up. She ends up in his bed with things rapidly going forward and her sensual instincts take over and - you got it, she likes it.

Now, she'll go through the horrors of hating what she did, the good wife (and she was/is?) and the euphoric pleasure she experienced.

We have just witnessed the making of a hotwife who has just become a slut, she doesn't know it yet but when she reports to him in her new job, he'll close his office door and while she stands there nervously fighting with her self over right and wrong, he'll take her and kiss her and then the office sex will become part of her daily work. She will worry and hate herself but she loves it, craves it and wants it.

It's a story guys. A good one.

Thanks!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago

Guilt? Remorse? There isn't any. A nigger loving cumslut? Yes she is. Should she be married? NO! Should she and her lover die a slow horrible death? Yes!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
Death to the Nigger Fantasist

You masturbate while you right your shit besodden nigger grotesquiries. Yea nigger, you have rode too high too long. You will pay for your lies. The white money that feeds you will be withdrawn. You will wallow in your own shit and then swallow it. Fantasize, it gives us power. Your invisible enemies.

Lynn_MXXLynn_MXXalmost 13 years ago

So far, this story has the makings of a classic. It's got a few minor failings that others have pointed out, but I really like the characters; PREDATORY black man, whose has charisma and charm, the expert SEDUCER. Ellen meanwhile, is the INNOCENT, CONSERVATIVE suburban housewife, who is RELUCTANT.

I just love stories like this, where the RELUCTANT, conscience-ridden innocent falls for the charms of the suave, seducer. Unfortunately, I have great difficulty in finding this sort of thing on here

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Highest form of depravity !!

Is to copulate with an genetically inferior species like niggers !! It's cleaner with an animals.

rcandjrcandjover 12 years ago

The seducing th white wife by a black man wiht a cock larger than her husband and lasting longer than 15 seconds is what makes these IR cuckolding stories wonderful.

marypatmnmarypatmnover 12 years ago
mary pat mn lady wants to go blaCK

LOVE THE STORY AND IT ENCURGAGES ME TO GO BLACK ALSO mARY

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
marypatmn, why don't you look in the mirror.

The way you spell pretty much tells me you're already black.

diegotoadstickerdiegotoadstickerover 9 years ago
Keep it Straight

Can't see how he fooled around under her skirt at dinner when you had already said she wore jeans to dinner. And the rest isn't much better. I'm sure the husband will never figure it out.

AnonymousAnonymousover 5 years ago
This racist

Tryin to make black men look like nothin but animal. Cocks with legs. That shit be defined of racist.

Leave the black man out of you wimpy sissy ass gay white boy fantasy.

AnonymousAnonymousover 5 years ago
Syart charging the guys

Gerald brings home for you now that your are divorced and working the streets as part of his stable.

furlovingchloefurlovingchloealmost 3 years ago

Yes the jeans thing is an obvious error, otherwise a horny story, loved it. Chloe tv x

PervertedKnightPervertedKnightover 1 year ago

$150,000 per month!?! Are you kidding me!? I'm sorry, but I had to quit reading right then and there. 1 star.

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