Why does it still surprise me how well you are able to throw us for a loop in every single chapter??
Very nice! Somehow I don't think this is going to calm her father down at all :)
by
Anonymous06/28/11
Omg
WOW! There are not enough words to express your total awesomeness. Love your work Jaz.
by
Anonymous06/28/11
Holy shit I'm a Crack-ho for ALL your writing!
When I first happened upon your writings in April this year, I laughed at how people would check every day for updates! That's because I could read the whole repertoire to the end of "A Long Walk Home". Godamnit now I'm one of them! You have to write more more more to satisfy these rabid "must read and check for Jaz Cullen stories" addictions that you've created! Every day you must write and post twice a day! Pretty please! Thank you. That is all!
Hey...see I've gotten my weekly fix so early in the week and the day. I'm like a drug addict for those stories..lol. Absolutely loved it!!! Keep up the good work...u're the best!!!
This is so much fun. On so many levels. The only downside to reading this so early in my day is now I have to wait a week! Can not wait for the next chapter! Definitely twists and turns to come!
I am really enjoying this story so far, definitely one of your best. Keep up the great work.
by
Anonymous06/28/11
GOD!! So good...
Me, I am no way good at this 'delayed gratification' thing, so the deliciousness I felt reading this chapter was quickly replaced by a sort of ache - no more Lily & Mac for a little while. *sigh* But I'll get over it, I'm a big girl lol!
Loved this chapter - lots to think about: Mac deciding to resist Lily (and just how is he going to do that??), Lily's contact with Kal, Lily & Karn's relationship, Lily defying Andrei's command to come home, how Lily will deal with Mac's 'love (blood?) pad', Kal's conversation with Annie (would like to be a fly on the wall for that one)... And it's all to come!
You wrote about the 'sub-pack' within the Armand-Harlon pack - hope we get to hear more about them. Intriging! I'm interested in all of them, but especially Kal, Liam and Kothari
For all of the years planning it took her to even get close to Mac. The fake id, the training w/Gard, besides trying to master her own personal talents, Lily is one strong "Kick Ass Female". Or is she? It sees that when she's away from the "mini-pack", she is almost a child. When it comes to dealing with non Varolce she is an emotional mess. She can't contain her anger and almost hurts someone she cares about. If she would have just obeyed Daddy none of this would be happening and the story wouldn't be. But luckily for me, Jaz has created a wonderful character in Lily. One to fall in love with.
my heart jerked and went out for Lily. To be faced with where her mate had taken other women oh poor Lily. I hope Mac gets whats coming to him for having her taken there and I think Lily is able enough to give it to him. Another awesome chapter and can't wait for the next.
Oh Jaz,I sincerely felt for Lily when she realized the truth. I can imagine the pain she felt. She def. needs to learn control. But other than that great chapter.
THE FIGHT(FIGHTS) ARE GOING TO BE EPIC, AND I THINK THE CHILDREN HAVE BEEN HURT BY HOW THEY WHERE RAISED, THEY NEVER HAD TO LEARN THE CONTROL THEY NEEDED DUE THE DUAL NATURE, NOW MAYBE THEY WILL
I absolutely love Lily! I think you blended the two different sides of her artfully. She discovered Mac so young that she hasn't had the chance to develop the kind of self-confidence and self-assurance that most young women gain from dating. On the other side though she knows what she excels at and she has confidence in those things. She's willful but she doesn't like hurting others or putting them in tough situations (yet she ends up doing just that). I think she may be your most deeply developed character yet.
i loved this chapter, through the tears and laughs and come to love Lily, Karn, Mac as much as everyone else and can't wait to see how Andrei reacts to being cut off like that
but he needs to learn to let go and realize his baby girl is grown up..lol but i don't think that will happen..lol
can't wait to read more, keep up the excellent work hun.
I like this story, but I have to admit that I don't really like Lily that much. I can't really explain it, one moment she's this hardcore vampire, a bit cocky and she kicks ass. Then the next its almost like she's a spoiled little girl who refuses to stop until she gets her way. As I said I do like the story I just don't really care for the female lead.
I cried and laugh at the same time,love it when a story can capture my entire being and make it change between so many mood, can not stop saying how much i love reading you story ,love it
another fun chapter, had me laughing out loud a couple of times...tho thats probably more to do with my odd sense of humour. Nice to have news of the other 'children' to, skipping 20 years meant we missed out on quite a bit with them...maybe we can persuade u into a one off special on the missing years? Just a thought. Thanks for sharing!
by
Anonymous06/29/11
hooked!
I must admit I wasn't going to read this new series. I'd figure I would play catch up with other writers on the site. But, nooo! I had to start reading this and I'm completely hooked.
Gifted, talented and brilliant don't begin to describe the quality of your work.
Hey Jaz, you can do vicious scenes really good when you want to!!!
No need to back down and explain it for the softer crowd, go hard baby! Heheheh, lovin' it! Need to pander to the action / blood thirsty crowds too!! LOL !! I like this one. Lily. Such a gentle little flower huh? LOL Can you imagine? She rips off Karns head and then says "oops!" LOL
Great writing! Didn't Lily slip though, mentioning the Pretorians to her father? Weren't the children unaware of their protection? I know Andrei is intelligent, but I hope he doesn't make the connection too soon!
by
Anonymous06/29/11
Absolutly love this story!!!
I must admit that I didn't really enjoy the last story as much as this one. Maybe I was because the fact that this is something very new in these vamp-were stories. This is definatly original and I am greatly impressed at your charaters' development, they are so hilarious!
This is gonna get very interesting now that Daddy is finally in the picture! I had to go back and read chapter 3 just for fun!!
I am soo in love with this story!!! Thank you for sharing!!
Will Chapter 5 be longer or shitty....LOL
Thanks for sharing!!!
Wow. I stumbled across your series recently and the thought that comes to my mind over and over again is what a waste. By your scores and comments it is obvious to all, before they even read, the depths of your talent. I cannot imagine that someone with such a gift would not use it on a professional level. I understand that to publish you would have to tone down the sex to implication rather than detailed but I feel it would not take away from the over all story. My tween is so in love with the non-horror world of werewolf and vampires and I know that this is a series she would love but for obvious reasons cannot read for a good many years to come. This genre has hit an all time high in pop culture but nobody has dared to bring the two worlds together such as you have. You have the strength and ability to create a whole new cult classic. Consider it. It would give you the freedom to do so much more with your talent.
by
Anonymous07/06/11
We'll be waiting
Patiently... hopefully until you choose to rejoin us again dearest Jaz.
You know young Lady You have a Talent of Writing to a Climax then Stopping the Story right in the Middle of it!!
You need to Keep going till You let the Charters come down from the Climatic High before You Stop the Chapter!
As Much as I Love your Stories! and i do! the Sex is good in it and You Make the Charters alive and real!
Btw What Happened to the 25 years Between?? I am sure that You could put 5-10 More Stories in that time if not More!
by
Anonymous07/07/11
Chapter 5 Pleeeeeeezzzzzz..
I am sitting on the very edge of my seat. OMG. When is Chapter 5 coming? I'm suffering from withdrawal symptoms!
by
Anonymous07/08/11
I love this story more and more!! Cant wait to read the next chapter :)
English
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
I can do nothing but squeal like a three year old girl over a puppy! Fantastic~
Awesome!
Why does it still surprise me how well you are able to throw us for a loop in every single chapter??
Very nice! Somehow I don't think this is going to calm her father down at all :)
Omg
WOW! There are not enough words to express your total awesomeness. Love your work Jaz.
Holy shit I'm a Crack-ho for ALL your writing!
When I first happened upon your writings in April this year, I laughed at how people would check every day for updates! That's because I could read the whole repertoire to the end of "A Long Walk Home". Godamnit now I'm one of them! You have to write more more more to satisfy these rabid "must read and check for Jaz Cullen stories" addictions that you've created! Every day you must write and post twice a day! Pretty please! Thank you. That is all!
dam girl
this is getting great umm wow i can 't wait to see what is going to happen next
Had me laughing....
Hey...see I've gotten my weekly fix so early in the week and the day. I'm like a drug addict for those stories..lol. Absolutely loved it!!! Keep up the good work...u're the best!!!
MORE!!!!
OK got my weekly fix-a-la Jaz. Can't wait for the tickets to go on sale for the fight of the year!!
Keep them coming dear, we will be waiting.
Such Fun
This is so much fun. On so many levels. The only downside to reading this so early in my day is now I have to wait a week! Can not wait for the next chapter! Definitely twists and turns to come!
Awesome
Totally blew me away what a fantastic chapter bring on chapter 5! Loved it!!
So good...
I am really enjoying this story so far, definitely one of your best. Keep up the great work.
GOD!! So good...
Me, I am no way good at this 'delayed gratification' thing, so the deliciousness I felt reading this chapter was quickly replaced by a sort of ache - no more Lily & Mac for a little while. *sigh* But I'll get over it, I'm a big girl lol!
Loved this chapter - lots to think about: Mac deciding to resist Lily (and just how is he going to do that??), Lily's contact with Kal, Lily & Karn's relationship, Lily defying Andrei's command to come home, how Lily will deal with Mac's 'love (blood?) pad', Kal's conversation with Annie (would like to be a fly on the wall for that one)... And it's all to come!
Thanks so much for your writing
F
Great Chapter
This was a great chapter as always Jaz and I cannot wait for the next instalment. Great work and keep them coming.
I've just posted my next chapter in my story so it shoud be online soon From Kay
Wonderful as always jaz! I am so enjoying all the new personalities ! Can't wait for the next one!
Can't wait for more...
You wrote about the 'sub-pack' within the Armand-Harlon pack - hope we get to hear more about them. Intriging! I'm interested in all of them, but especially Kal, Liam and Kothari
Thank you Jaz
A good read
The story moves along, the writing tight and concise as always.
More sub-pack..
I forgot Elina. I would really like to see her story too. The silver streak is just begging for a new story....
I think you might have enough here for a life's work LOL!!!
I'll make do with an update on Lily next week, for now ;)
Thanks Jaz
As Always...
Beautifully written, totally intriguing, am humbled by your storytelling. Thank you for sharing your talent! Can't wait for next chapter.
Love Lily
For all of the years planning it took her to even get close to Mac. The fake id, the training w/Gard, besides trying to master her own personal talents, Lily is one strong "Kick Ass Female". Or is she? It sees that when she's away from the "mini-pack", she is almost a child. When it comes to dealing with non Varolce she is an emotional mess. She can't contain her anger and almost hurts someone she cares about. If she would have just obeyed Daddy none of this would be happening and the story wouldn't be. But luckily for me, Jaz has created a wonderful character in Lily. One to fall in love with.
I enjoyed that.
I especially liked hearing about the personalities of the other young hybrids.
Character definition, plot construction, dialog...all spot on.
Thanks for a great chapter.
GE
Oh my...
my heart jerked and went out for Lily. To be faced with where her mate had taken other women oh poor Lily. I hope Mac gets whats coming to him for having her taken there and I think Lily is able enough to give it to him. Another awesome chapter and can't wait for the next.
I just cannot get enough of your stories. Until the next chapter.
Great
Oh Jaz,I sincerely felt for Lily when she realized the truth. I can imagine the pain she felt. She def. needs to learn control. But other than that great chapter.
-392OhMyGoodness
AWSOME
THE FIGHT(FIGHTS) ARE GOING TO BE EPIC, AND I THINK THE CHILDREN HAVE BEEN HURT BY HOW THEY WHERE RAISED, THEY NEVER HAD TO LEARN THE CONTROL THEY NEEDED DUE THE DUAL NATURE, NOW MAYBE THEY WILL
WOW
I absolutely love Lily! I think you blended the two different sides of her artfully. She discovered Mac so young that she hasn't had the chance to develop the kind of self-confidence and self-assurance that most young women gain from dating. On the other side though she knows what she excels at and she has confidence in those things. She's willful but she doesn't like hurting others or putting them in tough situations (yet she ends up doing just that). I think she may be your most deeply developed character yet.
Ah love, always complicating everything
Great story telling...
... especially the description of everyone in the sub-pack. all of the personalities are as expected, mainly due to their inherited genes.
Have absolutely no idea how this tale will conclude. hope you do gal, although hope thats a long way off yet!!
Keep up the good work ;0)
*sniffs sniffs*
i loved this chapter, through the tears and laughs and come to love Lily, Karn, Mac as much as everyone else and can't wait to see how Andrei reacts to being cut off like that
but he needs to learn to let go and realize his baby girl is grown up..lol but i don't think that will happen..lol
can't wait to read more, keep up the excellent work hun.
Donna
I like this story, but I have to admit that I don't really like Lily that much. I can't really explain it, one moment she's this hardcore vampire, a bit cocky and she kicks ass. Then the next its almost like she's a spoiled little girl who refuses to stop until she gets her way. As I said I do like the story I just don't really care for the female lead.
LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
I cried and laugh at the same time,love it when a story can capture my entire being and make it change between so many mood, can not stop saying how much i love reading you story ,love it
more more more (please!)
another fun chapter, had me laughing out loud a couple of times...tho thats probably more to do with my odd sense of humour. Nice to have news of the other 'children' to, skipping 20 years meant we missed out on quite a bit with them...maybe we can persuade u into a one off special on the missing years? Just a thought. Thanks for sharing!
hooked!
I must admit I wasn't going to read this new series. I'd figure I would play catch up with other writers on the site. But, nooo! I had to start reading this and I'm completely hooked.
Gifted, talented and brilliant don't begin to describe the quality of your work.
*****
.... and hurry up with chapter 5!
Billy Idol said it best
More more more
so excellent!
Ahhh! Such a great chapter!
Now that's what I'm talkin' about!
Hey Jaz, you can do vicious scenes really good when you want to!!!
No need to back down and explain it for the softer crowd, go hard baby! Heheheh, lovin' it! Need to pander to the action / blood thirsty crowds too!! LOL !! I like this one. Lily. Such a gentle little flower huh? LOL Can you imagine? She rips off Karns head and then says "oops!" LOL
Sorry. Couldn't help myself. Heheheh...
Another emotional roller-coaster
another Jax fix... now a week of cold turkey..
Loved it
Awesome
Great writing! Didn't Lily slip though, mentioning the Pretorians to her father? Weren't the children unaware of their protection? I know Andrei is intelligent, but I hope he doesn't make the connection too soon!
Absolutly love this story!!!
I must admit that I didn't really enjoy the last story as much as this one. Maybe I was because the fact that this is something very new in these vamp-were stories. This is definatly original and I am greatly impressed at your charaters' development, they are so hilarious!
you need to updated
like NOW! best story ever even better than the last one they just keep getting better!!!!
Amazing! Again....
You never cease to amaze me! Lovin' this story...
More please....;)
Lily is deep doodoo
once her daddy gets his claws on her. Moreover, Mac is in trouble once they get back to the compound.
Like I said before--I like Karn but we REALLY need to get him a woman.
Great chapter as usual, MEJ.
Stupendous!!!!
Thats all Im gonna say!!!:-}
So eventful!
Loved this chapter. It was also really nice to find out how the other children turned out.
Nice!!!
This is gonna get very interesting now that Daddy is finally in the picture! I had to go back and read chapter 3 just for fun!!
I am soo in love with this story!!! Thank you for sharing!!
Will Chapter 5 be longer or shitty....LOL
Thanks for sharing!!!
wasted talent
Wow. I stumbled across your series recently and the thought that comes to my mind over and over again is what a waste. By your scores and comments it is obvious to all, before they even read, the depths of your talent. I cannot imagine that someone with such a gift would not use it on a professional level. I understand that to publish you would have to tone down the sex to implication rather than detailed but I feel it would not take away from the over all story. My tween is so in love with the non-horror world of werewolf and vampires and I know that this is a series she would love but for obvious reasons cannot read for a good many years to come. This genre has hit an all time high in pop culture but nobody has dared to bring the two worlds together such as you have. You have the strength and ability to create a whole new cult classic. Consider it. It would give you the freedom to do so much more with your talent.
We'll be waiting
Patiently... hopefully until you choose to rejoin us again dearest Jaz.
Reconciling Lily's Actions
How will you explain that Lily. . .
who has had Rafe for an alpha for 30 years
her mom's a beta
her brother is the defacto hybrid Alpha
her teacher is Sarayne
has achieved no control over her wolf (or emotions) in 30 years???????????
A Big Fan
Ok when is the Next one OUT!!!
You know young Lady You have a Talent of Writing to a Climax then Stopping the Story right in the Middle of it!!
You need to Keep going till You let the Charters come down from the Climatic High before You Stop the Chapter!
As Much as I Love your Stories! and i do! the Sex is good in it and You Make the Charters alive and real!
Btw What Happened to the 25 years Between?? I am sure that You could put 5-10 More Stories in that time if not More!
Chapter 5 Pleeeeeeezzzzzz..
I am sitting on the very edge of my seat. OMG. When is Chapter 5 coming? I'm suffering from withdrawal symptoms!
I love this story more and more!! Cant wait to read the next chapter :)
need more
i so needs more of this story plzzz finish it ;(
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