by Hot_Sister
Got me hard from the first time he saw her naked and it never stopped till the end .
You are an artist that has painted an erotic masterpiece with a word processor, so finely done you can see even the finest detail in each brush stroke. Gave it a 5. Keep it up!
I loved it. Your characters are brilliant. The way you've kept the tension up the entire story was magnificent and I would love to read more. Maybe we'll get lucky and you'll decide to make it into a series. Thank you for one of the most erotic reads so far.
Excellent story...many try but few succeed...everything was superb...story line, hesitancy, passion, forbidden pleasure...great pace and WONDERFUL climax!!
Where to from here?? The sky is the limit....right??
Thanks!!
Your words make a reader feel like they are a part of this story. You MUST keep this going. It is too hot to end here.
Loved every sentence in this story, sooo erotic from start to finish.
omg...your story is amazing. so beautifully written with vivid detaill and the prolonged desire dripping off the page (screen?).
I didn't want it to end, but boy, when it did it ended well! the emotion and passion of the final scene was the perfect creshendo for the tension and desire that had been building throughout.
I hope to read more about these close-knit siblings soon.
Are you sure this is a story of fiction? It just seems too real -- as if you are relaying a personal experience that was so vivid, so luscious the words came gushing out.
Oh wait -- that's what good writers do and you are indeed a good writer. Loved the way you use the weather outside to define the buildup taking place inside. Great use of descriptive phrases that shed light onto the brother-sister relationship such as “the air is as thick as a wet sponge” and “the rain that everyone begged for still had not come” brings a literary sense to human relations.
Totally satisfying piece of literature.
you never say how old they are so we don't know if they are in high school, college or out of college. we would have a better understanding of them if you told us thier ages. if he was just out of high school or in a local college then we could see why he would stay even with the tension. if he was out of college then the way you wrote it it would have made more sense for him to move out so he could get away from her and the temptation
i can't read anything else here. that is excellent writing, truly. i could go on with detail, as you did, but you already know. just excellent.
I wish I had a sister to fuck like that, Great story, just drained my balls
Very good build up and climax. You've done this before. Now we need a follow-up. Perhaps a very sexy cousin could visit....discover what they are doing ....and join in.
I liked the story. Did he "fall" for Jennifer? I don't think so. Did he finally admit to his feelings for her and she admit to her feelings for him? I think so. "Falling" implies an accident. Not one of their actions was "by accident." Jenn left the bathroom door open. It wasn't an accident. Even with that semantic discord I found the story HOT and well written. Thanks.
The first seven paragraphs were one of the most effective intros to any story I have ever read. Thank You.
I wrote earlier to express my enjoyment for your story. Then it downed on me. Why did the story end with the fuck? I mean, is that really the end of the story? You seem to care so much for your characters throughout the build up then give up on them after sex. What were they thinking? How did this change their lives? How long did this sexual relationship last? Did either one of them have a boy or girl friend? Did mom find out? And where was dad or is there a dad? Way to many unanswered questions to make this a truly fulfilling story. Now . . . if this was just part one, that’s a different story. So was this part one or, like sex for some people, once the climax is over your done?
Again, after thinking more about the story I realized that this brother-sister tale might have ended with a climax but their story certainly does not.
Just keeps building until it just flattens you...Ripe for a sequel (which I hope you consider)...Very hot...Well done...
Haven't you ever heard of "Falling in Love" - no accident implied there and have you ever "Fell for someone" - no accident implied either. Yes, English is a fucked up language.
That was a pretty damn good story, but I do wish you'd make another one maybe "Falling for Jennifer 2?" I don't know but still I enjoyed reading it
Wow that was a very hot story!
I hope you continue with another one.
I'd love to have a sister like that.
Excellent writing! I loved the details - not just the characters and their action, but even the descriptions of the clouds. And yet none of it seemed waste or unimportant - you tell a good story.
This could stand alone, or be part of a series (which you also do well) - although I suspect it is hard to maintain credibility.
I think this is your best work to date!
...since my morals are fractured enough. I would have called it "Drawn into my Sister" in re Scorpio's complaint. I've always found it fairly hypocritical that this category is okay but Lit won't let great authors like Stang Star even refer to a possibility of underage sex. Any way, you are a very good writer, maybe stretch your horizon's a bit in a new category?
Erotic and yet still very warm and loving.
A simple little game that changed both of their lives forever, and for them, it was finding the perfect lover and mate. Someone that was the absolute best person to love.
Thanks for the good read
Very erotic, I loved it! Thanks for just an outstanding story!
I thought it was outstanding! Thanks for a Five Star erotic tale!
Well done! Thoroughly enjoyed this. The way you created and described that sexual tension was perfect. It didnt drag on, and it didnt end too quickly. Well done!
You should have a lot of 5s for this. Great build-up, the tension and fulfilment were well done.
There's a paragraph in the middle of page 2 that starts 'Even though I couldn't touch her intimately...' that is a beautiful expression of the awakening of love. I cite that passage, but actually the entire story is very well crafted. A very masterful job!
I loved it!!! That was HOT! HOT! HOT!
Very good. Just one question for donrico. Is splindiforus a word?
Love your work, it really sang to me. Wish my three sisters had come across like that, but then I was a wimp and did not let my true feeling out, thanks to the traditional aspect of sibling relationships in my day.
What a magnificent story...well crafted...dynamic tempo and a simply elegant tale on a troublesome topic. I'm now in my late 70s and supremely regret that I never considered my late sister as a potential sexual liaison. If only we could relive certain aspects of our lives. But your written offering will serve to bring me vicarious pleasure of an event that never happened to me. I think that for me it is less of the sex and more of the intense intimacy that would have propelled me into action.
Loved the writing. Erotic, taboo, descriptive. So very hot! Wil have to read more of you stories.
With such a HOT story like that, make's me wish I had a brother like that...
Very well written, loved your characters and their play. You make the reader (me) feel a part in the story. Extremely erotic, hot and taboo. Adored your creation. Will read more.
Wow!one of the most erotic romantic stories ever
Ok,that was fuckin awesome!Eyes the color of doves wings...Hope to hell I can use that line sometime in my life.
Hope you've got a lot more stories out there cuz I'm damn sure gonna be lookin...
Thank's!
you made me feel like it was my sister and i was falling in love with her
Just an incredible story. I have read several of your stories and have not found one that I did not rate 5 stars.
I'm barely on page 1 and this is damn good!
Taking a drink of cold water and off to read page 2.
Held me at the edge waiting for more as the story progressed.
With all the noise they were making I expected mom to come in and see them then tell them it was ok making a great ending.
This is one of the nicest written brother-sister incest single-stage short stories I've read in a long time. Well done, looking forward to reading much more of your work. 5 stars
The writing in this story is really superior. Keep it up!
Really captured the buildup of desire, and its final ravishing power and climax.
Excellent writing skills.........incredible !!
...can I breathe now ? :-)
Thanks for a great story.
You are truly gifted at writing erotica. The reader feels as if they were the one receiving her gift.
That reminded me of the times with my sister. Excellent read. I hope you do some more
Articulate writing on Literotica. And good plot developement! What will they think of next? Btw: your story's pretty hot, too.
One of the best stories I have read!
My English is not enough to express what I felt while reading this magnificent story.
For a few moments, I closed my eyes and was David, loving Jenny more than anything in the world.
Can't wait for Ch.2. I'll read it as soon as I have time.
If I could, I would give it a 10!
Lovely, just lovely! ^.^ Well-written and nicely developed, likable characters, beautiful, sensual, poetic... Reminiscent of the author youbadboy, which is a huge compliment from me. There's a certain writing style I enjoy the most from others, and you possess it. Wonderful story. Can't wait to read more.
god they seemed real people they were not eh? I would have fucked Jennifer too
... be the person making $700,000 a day with 50 Shades of Grey?
My sexual arousal dies a terrible death when confronted with horrible writing. Thus, I made it through only 11 pages of the book currently squatting offensively on the top of the NY Times bestseller list. Had the content been in your capable hands I expect I would be a fan.
You're incredibly talented. I didn't even finish this story before favoriting you.
This is an amazing read and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Keep up the great work.
This is Probably the Greatest Story of Real True Love of Young Love I've Ever Read
Wow, this is awesome; this story has it all; slow-burn tension, sexual heat, a hot and satisfying fulfillment of desire, perfect! I also write on this site, my style favouring a narrative that encompasses the characters, rather than outlines them, and this story appeals to my personal aesthetic on so many levels - I only wish it were longer!
That depends . . is she on the pill If not . . . well that's another story.
marvelous, truly a story i would suggest to any reader of romance
I am sure Ch. 2 will be just as good if not better!
This is a great story so please add some more. There is a lot of this story yet to be told.
First of yours I have read but it looks to me like you could become one of the greats here...
Keep up the good work...
I feel like a female wrote this and am soaking wet. The sexual descriptions where poetic and romantic and intensly sexual. Great job and I want more. My mental images were stimulated. I am tingling.
Just to let you know you'd have gotten a whole five stars if I didn't think it were a bit too much like arse kissing. Way to go. :)
Scale
5 star story, nicely written-good build-up, then hot torrid sex as they find each other-thanks
One among the top 5 stories Ive read!I am sure that the writer must have experienced sex with his sister because the writing,the words are so true,so beautiful,with so much details that he must have really fucked his hot sister.I'm seeing myself with my sister Sue,how it happened,how it was (and is still) the best love and fuck of our lives.I'm 40 and Sue 35.We are still together since 22 years!!As are parents are no more,we have moved to another country where we live like wife and husband.We have also a beautiful daughter of 10 years old.Fortunately,she has no health problem and we shall wait her 15 th birthday to tell her the truth about us.
To the writer a word of literary advice. A story, any story, needs some degree of "Introduction" of the caracters, such as names, a little background of comparison, their ages or at least some history and/or chronology that indicates their maturity as teenagers, adolescents or young adults!!! All we know about these loving and lovely, incestual lovers is, there is a brother David and there is a sister Jennifer and they are male and female blood-related siblings!!
This story (Chapter 01, as I now see there is a Chapter 02) is perfectly constructed in the development and associations of David and Jennifer as brother and sister as carnal incestual lovers! There is even the additional bliss that Jennifer might now be pregnant (which would have gained Five (5) Stars from this reader had the detail been confirmed!); they have found their spiritual and emotional love, for each other, far beyond the simple brother and sister sibling love!! They have expressed their relationship in terms of longevity of "forever", meaning most probably eternal and until "death do they part"!!
The story is well written. The images of David's and Jennifer's foreplay (though limited and short) is very vivid and well described and detailed. The character's of David and Jennifer are well role-adapted and performed as the true and dear romatics they have become!!! There are a very minimum of goofs/errors, nothing that detracts from the essence and feel of the story, content nor context!! IF, the next Chapter 02 is as all-consuming, with the direction of their romance to be life-fulfilling and complete as any family life and style should be--without any outsiders--this story will be an EPIC, and worthy of accolades of grand proportions! My fervent hope is the writer treats these lovers, with dignity, respect for each other, and an all-encompasing pleasure for them, their lives, and of course the readers!!
After awhile it was fairly obvious she was going to give in, just a matter of time.
Created vivid images in my mind. I suppose that is what a story should, right? Well, not all of them do.
this reminds me of me and my one sister we played for about a year before we fucked like rabbit's...that was 25 yrs ago and to think my other sister also got involved.and the best part is now my nieces are also in the fold.
Bigdaddy, there was more introduction than you listed, but as usual you didnt bother to read it so you could rush to the end to post your usual long, rambling, pointless post. Sigh. How many times have you said a story missed this or that but when I read it the stuff was there? Lots. Read slower or take some memory vitamins. ...and post stuff like, 'hey, that was a good story, thanks for writing!' (Sarcasm: OFF;)
Loved the story, good build up to eventual climax and well characterised. Just need to carry on with their story please.
I always think my stories are well written until I read a story like this one and see what good writing looks like. I'd write more about your fantastic descriptive skills, but I have ch.2 to read.
Thanks for sharing your work with us!
JUST PERFECT WITH NOTHING BUT CLASS. NOW THAT THERE IS NO GOING BACK, THERE HAS TO BE MORE TO THIS STORY. DO NOT INCLUDE MOM, KEEP IT REAL, A SECRET, AND HOT.......
AWESOME!AWESOME!The best of best incest stories between a sister and her brother.Its just not only fucking ,it's full of love,a love having a taste of honey!!IIts clear that these two will never go apart.They were both made to be together forever!This story is so well written.Congratulations to the. author.He should write another chapter where the love continues and makes them having a baby.10 on 10!
loved the story. beautifully perfect. please continue. i hope shes gets pregnant from him. and get the mom in on it to.
This is he type of story I love. Just fund you but will ead more
Really well written, engrossing as heck, the right balance between love and lust, paced pretty well, next to no spelling or grammar issues, good use of synonyms, made me care about the characters, and the payoff was awesome! Definitely bookmarking you so I can keep an eye on your writing!
Seriously, I would happily read a novel written by you, even if there was little to no sex. It'd be interesting to see how you handle stressful relationships between family and friends, like arranged marriages or reuniting from adoption after many years...
Keep it up! :)
I was disappointed in the Christmas Cruise story, but this one is a masterpiece - great characterizations, realistic settings and plots, but mostly a real balance of love and lust between siblings. You've done well, an I'm looking forward to Ch 2 and even more.
11
spectacularly done!
btw, mom must have been blind to not see the mounting sexual tension between these two.
I am as hard as a rock reading this. Love the slow-burn approach to the development of the sexual relationship.
I read the last several paragraphs out loud (trying to stay awake) ....and I realized, it reads like a romance novel, hehehe ;)