Held me at the edge waiting for more as the story progressed.
With all the noise they were making I expected mom to come in and see them then tell them it was ok making a great ending.
This is one of the nicest written brother-sister incest single-stage short stories I've read in a long time. Well done, looking forward to reading much more of your work. 5 stars
by
Anonymous01/16/12
Wonderful writing!
The writing in this story is really superior. Keep it up!
by
Anonymous02/04/12
Fulfillment
Really captured the buildup of desire, and its final ravishing power and climax.
One of the best stories I have read!
My English is not enough to express what I felt while reading this magnificent story.
For a few moments, I closed my eyes and was David, loving Jenny more than anything in the world.
Can't wait for Ch.2. I'll read it as soon as I have time.
If I could, I would give it a 10!
Lovely, just lovely! ^.^ Well-written and nicely developed, likable characters, beautiful, sensual, poetic... Reminiscent of the author youbadboy, which is a huge compliment from me. There's a certain writing style I enjoy the most from others, and you possess it. Wonderful story. Can't wait to read more.
by
Anonymous08/01/12
oooh yeah
god they seemed real people they were not eh? I would have fucked Jennifer too
... be the person making $700,000 a day with 50 Shades of Grey?
My sexual arousal dies a terrible death when confronted with horrible writing. Thus, I made it through only 11 pages of the book currently squatting offensively on the top of the NY Times bestseller list. Had the content been in your capable hands I expect I would be a fan.
You're incredibly talented. I didn't even finish this story before favoriting you.
Wow, this is awesome; this story has it all; slow-burn tension, sexual heat, a hot and satisfying fulfillment of desire, perfect! I also write on this site, my style favouring a narrative that encompasses the characters, rather than outlines them, and this story appeals to my personal aesthetic on so many levels - I only wish it were longer!
by
Anonymous02/16/13
what next?
That depends . . is she on the pill If not . . . well that's another story.
This is a great story so please add some more. There is a lot of this story yet to be told.
First of yours I have read but it looks to me like you could become one of the greats here...
Keep up the good work...
by
Anonymous06/02/13
DreamingIhad a brother
I feel like a female wrote this and am soaking wet. The sexual descriptions where poetic and romantic and intensly sexual. Great job and I want more. My mental images were stimulated. I am tingling.
by
Anonymous07/22/13
Four Star Principle
Just to let you know you'd have gotten a whole five stars if I didn't think it were a bit too much like arse kissing. Way to go. :)
Scale
5 star story, nicely written-good build-up, then hot torrid sex as they find each other-thanks
by
Anonymous08/06/13
sisterlove
One among the top 5 stories Ive read!I am sure that the writer must have experienced sex with his sister because the writing,the words are so true,so beautiful,with so much details that he must have really fucked his hot sister.I'm seeing myself with my sister Sue,how it happened,how it was (and is still) the best love and fuck of our lives.I'm 40 and Sue 35.We are still together since 22 years!!As are parents are no more,we have moved to another country where we live like wife and husband.We have also a beautiful daughter of 10 years old.Fortunately,she has no health problem and we shall wait her 15 th birthday to tell her the truth about us.
"Falling For Jennifer Ch. 01:" - David and Jennifer - (Brother and Sister)
To the writer a word of literary advice. A story, any story, needs some degree of "Introduction" of the caracters, such as names, a little background of comparison, their ages or at least some history and/or chronology that indicates their maturity as teenagers, adolescents or young adults!!! All we know about these loving and lovely, incestual lovers is, there is a brother David and there is a sister Jennifer and they are male and female blood-related siblings!!
This story (Chapter 01, as I now see there is a Chapter 02) is perfectly constructed in the development and associations of David and Jennifer as brother and sister as carnal incestual lovers! There is even the additional bliss that Jennifer might now be pregnant (which would have gained Five (5) Stars from this reader had the detail been confirmed!); they have found their spiritual and emotional love, for each other, far beyond the simple brother and sister sibling love!! They have expressed their relationship in terms of longevity of "forever", meaning most probably eternal and until "death do they part"!!
The story is well written. The images of David's and Jennifer's foreplay (though limited and short) is very vivid and well described and detailed. The character's of David and Jennifer are well role-adapted and performed as the true and dear romatics they have become!!! There are a very minimum of goofs/errors, nothing that detracts from the essence and feel of the story, content nor context!! IF, the next Chapter 02 is as all-consuming, with the direction of their romance to be life-fulfilling and complete as any family life and style should be--without any outsiders--this story will be an EPIC, and worthy of accolades of grand proportions! My fervent hope is the writer treats these lovers, with dignity, respect for each other, and an all-encompasing pleasure for them, their lives, and of course the readers!!
this reminds me of me and my one sister we played for about a year before we fucked like rabbit's...that was 25 yrs ago and to think my other sister also got involved.and the best part is now my nieces are also in the fold.
by
Anonymous03/27/14
Bigdaddy, there was more introduction than you listed, but as usual you didnt bother to read it so you could rush to the end to post your usual long, rambling, pointless post. Sigh. How many times have you said a story missed this or that but when I read it the stuff was there? Lots. Read slower or take some memory vitamins. ...and post stuff like, 'hey, that was a good story, thanks for writing!' (Sarcasm: OFF;)
I always think my stories are well written until I read a story like this one and see what good writing looks like. I'd write more about your fantastic descriptive skills, but I have ch.2 to read.
JUST PERFECT WITH NOTHING BUT CLASS. NOW THAT THERE IS NO GOING BACK, THERE HAS TO BE MORE TO THIS STORY. DO NOT INCLUDE MOM, KEEP IT REAL, A SECRET, AND HOT.......
by
Anonymous06/20/14
sisterluv
AWESOME!AWESOME!The best of best incest stories between a sister and her brother.Its just not only fucking ,it's full of love,a love having a taste of honey!!IIts clear that these two will never go apart.They were both made to be together forever!This story is so well written.Congratulations to the. author.He should write another chapter where the love continues and makes them having a baby.10 on 10!
This is he type of story I love. Just fund you but will ead more
by
Anonymous10/19/14
hot
really hot
by
Anonymous11/27/14
Just... Wow
Really well written, engrossing as heck, the right balance between love and lust, paced pretty well, next to no spelling or grammar issues, good use of synonyms, made me care about the characters, and the payoff was awesome! Definitely bookmarking you so I can keep an eye on your writing!
Seriously, I would happily read a novel written by you, even if there was little to no sex. It'd be interesting to see how you handle stressful relationships between family and friends, like arranged marriages or reuniting from adoption after many years...
Keep it up! :)
I was disappointed in the Christmas Cruise story, but this one is a masterpiece - great characterizations, realistic settings and plots, but mostly a real balance of love and lust between siblings. You've done well, an I'm looking forward to Ch 2 and even more.
English
Kept me at the edge, Great story
Held me at the edge waiting for more as the story progressed.
With all the noise they were making I expected mom to come in and see them then tell them it was ok making a great ending.
WOW!
Nothing short of amazing, keep up the great work
excellent
This is one of the nicest written brother-sister incest single-stage short stories I've read in a long time. Well done, looking forward to reading much more of your work. 5 stars
Wonderful writing!
The writing in this story is really superior. Keep it up!
Fulfillment
Really captured the buildup of desire, and its final ravishing power and climax.
PHEW!!!
Excellent writing skills.........incredible !!
...can I breathe now ? :-)
Thanks for a great story.
critic
absolutely well written ,more to come I hope
Superbly written
You are truly gifted at writing erotica. The reader feels as if they were the one receiving her gift.
brother-sister love
That reminded me of the times with my sister. Excellent read. I hope you do some more
Holy cow, Batman!
Articulate writing on Literotica. And good plot developement! What will they think of next? Btw: your story's pretty hot, too.
Lovely... Enticing!
One of the best stories I have read!
My English is not enough to express what I felt while reading this magnificent story.
For a few moments, I closed my eyes and was David, loving Jenny more than anything in the world.
Can't wait for Ch.2. I'll read it as soon as I have time.
If I could, I would give it a 10!
Exquisite...
Lovely, just lovely! ^.^ Well-written and nicely developed, likable characters, beautiful, sensual, poetic... Reminiscent of the author youbadboy, which is a huge compliment from me. There's a certain writing style I enjoy the most from others, and you possess it. Wonderful story. Can't wait to read more.
oooh yeah
god they seemed real people they were not eh? I would have fucked Jennifer too
Why can't someone with your talent...
... be the person making $700,000 a day with 50 Shades of Grey?
My sexual arousal dies a terrible death when confronted with horrible writing. Thus, I made it through only 11 pages of the book currently squatting offensively on the top of the NY Times bestseller list. Had the content been in your capable hands I expect I would be a fan.
You're incredibly talented. I didn't even finish this story before favoriting you.
Fantastic!
This is an amazing read and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Keep up the great work.
This is A grand title for a Love Story
This is Probably the Greatest Story of Real True Love of Young Love I've Ever Read
That was a great story. Thanks
WOW
Thats probably the best story ive ever read on here, nice job!!!!!
Hot, HOT story!
Wow, this is awesome; this story has it all; slow-burn tension, sexual heat, a hot and satisfying fulfillment of desire, perfect! I also write on this site, my style favouring a narrative that encompasses the characters, rather than outlines them, and this story appeals to my personal aesthetic on so many levels - I only wish it were longer!
what next?
That depends . . is she on the pill If not . . . well that's another story.
indeed
marvelous, truly a story i would suggest to any reader of romance
Awesome!
This story is a definite keeper... Hope there's more!
Incredibly erotic and beautiful!
I am sure Ch. 2 will be just as good if not better!
More PLEASE!!!
This is a great story so please add some more. There is a lot of this story yet to be told.
First of yours I have read but it looks to me like you could become one of the greats here...
Keep up the good work...
DreamingIhad a brother
I feel like a female wrote this and am soaking wet. The sexual descriptions where poetic and romantic and intensly sexual. Great job and I want more. My mental images were stimulated. I am tingling.
Four Star Principle
Just to let you know you'd have gotten a whole five stars if I didn't think it were a bit too much like arse kissing. Way to go. :)
Scale
great story-totally hot sex
5 star story, nicely written-good build-up, then hot torrid sex as they find each other-thanks
sisterlove
One among the top 5 stories Ive read!I am sure that the writer must have experienced sex with his sister because the writing,the words are so true,so beautiful,with so much details that he must have really fucked his hot sister.I'm seeing myself with my sister Sue,how it happened,how it was (and is still) the best love and fuck of our lives.I'm 40 and Sue 35.We are still together since 22 years!!As are parents are no more,we have moved to another country where we live like wife and husband.We have also a beautiful daughter of 10 years old.Fortunately,she has no health problem and we shall wait her 15 th birthday to tell her the truth about us.
"Falling For Jennifer Ch. 01:" - David and Jennifer - (Brother and Sister)
To the writer a word of literary advice. A story, any story, needs some degree of "Introduction" of the caracters, such as names, a little background of comparison, their ages or at least some history and/or chronology that indicates their maturity as teenagers, adolescents or young adults!!! All we know about these loving and lovely, incestual lovers is, there is a brother David and there is a sister Jennifer and they are male and female blood-related siblings!!
This story (Chapter 01, as I now see there is a Chapter 02) is perfectly constructed in the development and associations of David and Jennifer as brother and sister as carnal incestual lovers! There is even the additional bliss that Jennifer might now be pregnant (which would have gained Five (5) Stars from this reader had the detail been confirmed!); they have found their spiritual and emotional love, for each other, far beyond the simple brother and sister sibling love!! They have expressed their relationship in terms of longevity of "forever", meaning most probably eternal and until "death do they part"!!
The story is well written. The images of David's and Jennifer's foreplay (though limited and short) is very vivid and well described and detailed. The character's of David and Jennifer are well role-adapted and performed as the true and dear romatics they have become!!! There are a very minimum of goofs/errors, nothing that detracts from the essence and feel of the story, content nor context!! IF, the next Chapter 02 is as all-consuming, with the direction of their romance to be life-fulfilling and complete as any family life and style should be--without any outsiders--this story will be an EPIC, and worthy of accolades of grand proportions! My fervent hope is the writer treats these lovers, with dignity, respect for each other, and an all-encompasing pleasure for them, their lives, and of course the readers!!
her resolve slowly breaks..
After awhile it was fairly obvious she was going to give in, just a matter of time.
Great vocabulary, intense scenes
Created vivid images in my mind. I suppose that is what a story should, right? Well, not all of them do.
Wow!
Awesome story and I bet they have more to tell
this reminds me of me and my one sister we played for about a year before we fucked like rabbit's...that was 25 yrs ago and to think my other sister also got involved.and the best part is now my nieces are also in the fold.
Bigdaddy, there was more introduction than you listed, but as usual you didnt bother to read it so you could rush to the end to post your usual long, rambling, pointless post. Sigh. How many times have you said a story missed this or that but when I read it the stuff was there? Lots. Read slower or take some memory vitamins. ...and post stuff like, 'hey, that was a good story, thanks for writing!' (Sarcasm: OFF;)
More Please
Loved the story, good build up to eventual climax and well characterised. Just need to carry on with their story please.
I Bow to the Master
I always think my stories are well written until I read a story like this one and see what good writing looks like. I'd write more about your fantastic descriptive skills, but I have ch.2 to read.
Thanks for sharing your work with us!
Wow
Simply epic
good story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PERFECT
JUST PERFECT WITH NOTHING BUT CLASS. NOW THAT THERE IS NO GOING BACK, THERE HAS TO BE MORE TO THIS STORY. DO NOT INCLUDE MOM, KEEP IT REAL, A SECRET, AND HOT.......
sisterluv
AWESOME!AWESOME!The best of best incest stories between a sister and her brother.Its just not only fucking ,it's full of love,a love having a taste of honey!!IIts clear that these two will never go apart.They were both made to be together forever!This story is so well written.Congratulations to the. author.He should write another chapter where the love continues and makes them having a baby.10 on 10!
perfect
loved the story. beautifully perfect. please continue. i hope shes gets pregnant from him. and get the mom in on it to.
Fantastic story
This is he type of story I love. Just fund you but will ead more
hot
really hot
Just... Wow
Really well written, engrossing as heck, the right balance between love and lust, paced pretty well, next to no spelling or grammar issues, good use of synonyms, made me care about the characters, and the payoff was awesome! Definitely bookmarking you so I can keep an eye on your writing!
Seriously, I would happily read a novel written by you, even if there was little to no sex. It'd be interesting to see how you handle stressful relationships between family and friends, like arranged marriages or reuniting from adoption after many years...
Keep it up! :)
THJAT is how you right a brother/sister story
I was disappointed in the Christmas Cruise story, but this one is a masterpiece - great characterizations, realistic settings and plots, but mostly a real balance of love and lust between siblings. You've done well, an I'm looking forward to Ch 2 and even more.
on a scale of 1-5
11
spectacularly done!
btw, mom must have been blind to not see the mounting sexual tension between these two.
Amazing story
Brilliantly written. You are a truly gifted erotic writer.
thought i was there
vary well written
Perfectly written
I am as hard as a rock reading this. Love the slow-burn approach to the development of the sexual relationship.
I read the last several paragraphs out loud (trying to stay awake) ....and I realized, it reads like a romance novel, hehehe ;)
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