I thought it was brilliantly done and the ending was perfect. Susan clearly underestimated Clint drastically. Sending that photo at the end told her everything he wanted her to know. He was aware of her affair all along, whereas she thought he was clueless, he caused MCG's legal downfall (the conspiracy to defraud was discussed after the sex session photographed), and last but not least, that she is still seeing herself through his eyes, as she did with his gift of a photograph in college, only now as the cheating slut she became.
Finally! I enjoy stories where the man acts as a man. No counseling, explanations, hormonal imbalance, reasons why, she cheated-just say goodbye. The Man got his revenge on the 'Oh so superior' cheaters in his own way and so effective. I'm glad he does not even think about taking her back.
by
Anonymous05/13/14
Enjoyed
Enjoyed the story very much. As I was reading, I couldn't help but think of 'theCelt'. This story reminded me of stories in his Consequences series and also of his writing and storytelling style; and that is meant as high praise.
In so many of these stories the wife "loves" her husband, who makes sweet love to her, but sometimes they "need" to be "taken'>
Does it never occur to them to mention that to their husbands? True, some guys just may not have it in them to treat their wives like that, but why not at least give him the chance before cheating on him?
And in the case of this story, she can't be as intelligent as she would have us think if she thought he got a divorce petition between her arrest and her coming home. He obviously was already working on it and was either going to serve her then anyway, or it seemed like a good time to do it.
Being a student of human behavior I always find these types of stories very sad. Which tells me that you too are a student of behavior of sorts. Otherwise, you wouldn't be able to develope such realistic characters and believable scenarios that make your stories very plausible. Thank you, very entertaining, sad but entertaining and that is the goal of the author. To evoke a response and entertain, Well done
He could have at least given her an opportunity to apologize; despite all the facade of a tender lover, Clint appears quite vindictive and repressed; he is probably too intense for a worldly wise Susan anyway. Adultery is not alright, as much as craving for love and spurning the one who is loved is.
by
Anonymous10/10/14
good span of writing
I started with your latest story on 10/14, and then came back to your first alphabetically, which was also your very first submittal on 7/11. You are a very good author, and I intend to read all your stories now in between the two dates.
This story is unique in that the 2 pictures captured her state of mind - in love in the beginning, and in lust for power and sex in the second. We don't know how the second was obtained (perhaps a PI), but the personality change was obvious. That change ruined her life, and she lost someone who loved her very much.
... for the laugh. What exactly would an apology do? Nothing. From her it would just be justification for her misbehaviour, and she knew what she was doing 100%. Even if you're the most kindest lover in the world you shouldn't be forced to listen to someone who hurt you in such an intimate capacity
“It's just that I need that something extra from Charles that Clint just can't provide."
Not to repeat myself, but how does she know that Clint “can’t” provide that “something extra” if she never ASKS for it?
by
Anonymous02/21/15
99.99%
Enjoyed this, but I think you missed one little opportunity (in my opinion). I don't think you needed to add "She screamed." at the end. It wasn't really required (the reader can fill in their own desired reaction). But more to the point, I love the idea of ending the story with the exact same quote you used to start it.
Also, if you were to change it, maybe modify the opening quote slightly. You have a comma after the second "Take it," . . . That could be a period to match the ending quote. . . or maybe an exclamation point (but then use the exclamation on the ending quote too).
I love these stories. FM has a great way with words. Although it would have been a better tag line to have as the last sentence
"Clint had again not photographed her as he saw her' But most readers can pick that up. (As well as it was probably Clint. and/or Jennifer who blew the whistle!)
I would have given you five but you let the whore off way to fucking easily. Jail time was in order. Lesser offense, certainly, but no jail time, not a chance.
The divorce aspect seemed like an extra ... Felt like it was just "there" as a footnote. It left me with a "missing" feeling especially when you wrapped the ending in a photo. It felt like emphasis placed on a nonessential portion of the tale.
When a person's intelligence is exceeded by their arrogance - they will cheat. No matter how smart they are, no one can commit the perfect crime. There is always evidence, there is always at least one witness, often arrogant people confess to others to heighten their sense of superiority.
I realize stories have an energy and life decided by the muse-ings (sic) of the author, and indeed this is another of your fine efforts.
Perhaps the muse will lead you to an expanded story where Clint's experiences and actions (along with Jennifer's?) would be interspersed to dramatic effect.
I would hazard a guess that Clint in his investigation of her affair was bugging her, and that's how he found out about the fraud, and turned over his tapes to the FBI.
Still five stars. Still love it. Started very strong but the ending left me wanting. He chose to never tell her why he was divorcing her, until much later. Why then? Was he the one who tipped off the Feds? Why would she be upset at his revelation? She didn't seem to ever give a flip before. What does this knowledge now make a difference.
by
Anonymous03/24/16
A good one, hits close to home
My wife left me because of reuniting with an old boyfriend. I knew he had hurt her badly when he popped her cherry, but it wasn't until she left me that I found she was a size queen. Now, my dick isn't small, 7"x6.5" so while not super long, very thick. However, when I walked into my house after a truck didn't show up at our worksite, I wasn't prepared for the size of what I found. My wife was on her knees on the couch and Tom was pounding into her from the back. It could only be called a small pole. My epiphany? No wonder she never felt that tight to me, after fucking him for two years before us.
She saw me and screamed, Tom shouted and pulled that fucking log out of her cunt, spewing sperm everywhere. I told her I wanted her gone for a few hours while I got hold of myself and almost laughed when they drove off together. In one hour and fifteen minutes, I erased myself from her life. Not even a picture was left behind. That included her phone, in her haste she left that too and I deleted them all.
I never spoke to her again. Hurt, I hooked up to our fifth wheel and drove away. Sitting on a mountaintop and camping on top of the world, I sat with a cheap laptop and wrote a book. It took me six weeks and 5 days. The editing took another four days and then I contacted my sister, an agent with, well, I'm not going to say. A large prestigious agency.
Joni was stunned to say the least. While she had a PhD in literature and a few other things, I was a high school graduate. She tweaked it a bit, then introduced it to her agency. Penguin picked it up and basically, I was set for life in a couple different ways. One, I could not only write, but rqim I could produced novels in the 100K word count range every three months, maximum. I still produce them in 4-6 weeks generally.
We didn't do all this until our divorce was settled. Josie didn't want a divorce but I told the court I refused to be married to a cheating whore. Yes, I said that, verbatim. A $2,000 fine stopped my mouth after that, but Josie knew I was done. We were divorced in 4 months and she moved in with Tom. I stayed on my mountaintop and wrote more and when my first printing was released, `100,000 copies, they sold out in ninety days. The second printing, increased by two and a half, sold out in another 18 months. By then, my name was all over our hometown and my ex tried to come back into my life.
Josie had left Tom because she learned fucking a cheater is just that, fucking a cheater. He couldn't stay with just her and when he left, or she kicked him out, I could care less which, he left her a gift. It was one that left warts and all sorts of nasty things down there. She used the premise of having me sign a copy to get in my trailer door and told me how much she loved me. Yeah, I saw her love in action.
I've written and had published fourteen books now. A great fanbase is being produced and they all have sold well. Josie? Well, she still stops in but I let her talk to my wife now. A wonderful redhead I met on a signing tour and we are head over heels in love.
“he loves me completely – he'd never do anything to hurt me." – Until YOU hurt HIM!
"I guess Clint did hear the news, and now he's deserting me. So much for 'for better or worse.'" – As KarenE said, he couldn’t have gotten the divorce petition that quickly, so he wasn’t “deserting” her because of her arrest, he obviously found out about her affair and was already prepared to dump her cheating ass!
“And I thought he was committed to our marriage!" – She’s one to complain about “commitment”!
"I never guessed she was talking about herself," – She has no right to be angry, Jennifer warned her!
by
Anonymous03/25/16
-1*
If you use law enforcement you need to be on the money. As soon as you lawyer up the questioning stops. Plus to jail somebody you have to charge them. Bail is based on something.
The story got to phony to be good.
I have read and liked some of your work. Be real in the future.
An arogant boss, a beautiful intelligent wife, a handsome laid back husband and a friend with a friendly warning .... around these one dimensional characters a very thin story evolved ......
Not one of the best tales from our Francis.
3*
BEWARE the Facebook profile at dearbornmt@yah** Unless you want to give up personal info to a potential phishing scam or become an unwitting part of some potential psych study or potential blackmail scheme.
Laurel and company don't seem to want to do anything about this but please don't put yourself at risk.
Practice Safe Internet Perversion!
by
Anonymous08/18/16
foolscap
You do indeed have a fool's cap on!
Facebook profile of dearbornmt@yahoo.com is none of your paranoid warnings.
The profile provides some of the TRUE, REAL, AND FACTUAL details of how a unrepentant serial cheating wife and college instructor in Helena Montana used that position to get a married male student of hers to engage in an adulterous affair. Before, during and after that affair, a number of other female instructors violated the college's Student Confidentiality Policy and engaged in spreading false rumors and making slanderous comments about the student. Those actions damaged the student's reputation and marriage not to mention the psychological stress he endured. He was being harassed but because he was a white, middle-aged, construction worker seems a number of prejudiced assumptions were made. An older female who was the instructor's Dept Head basically stated she thought the student, whom she had never met-she judged by appearances only, was a knuckle-dragging sexual predator planning on sexually assaulting the instructor.
A person close to the student believed he should be vindicated, although the damage could never be fully undone. The rumors had been repeated too often, spread to far and believed by too many.
I applaud foolscap's intentions but in this case they are misplaced and without merit
by
Anonymous10/05/16
dearbornmt@yahoo dope...
Unless you can provide a usable Facebook (or any other kind of) link then it matters not if you are real or a phisher.
I loved this
I thought it was brilliantly done and the ending was perfect. Susan clearly underestimated Clint drastically. Sending that photo at the end told her everything he wanted her to know. He was aware of her affair all along, whereas she thought he was clueless, he caused MCG's legal downfall (the conspiracy to defraud was discussed after the sex session photographed), and last but not least, that she is still seeing herself through his eyes, as she did with his gift of a photograph in college, only now as the cheating slut she became.
Voted 5* Thanks for sharing
#2 ARS GRATIS ARTIST
and some people who aren't savants, TK U MLJ LV NV
Her arogance and disregard was her downfall
it wasn't till he sent her the photograph that she understood the whole picture.
Yes!
Finally! I enjoy stories where the man acts as a man. No counseling, explanations, hormonal imbalance, reasons why, she cheated-just say goodbye. The Man got his revenge on the 'Oh so superior' cheaters in his own way and so effective. I'm glad he does not even think about taking her back.
Enjoyed
Enjoyed the story very much. As I was reading, I couldn't help but think of 'theCelt'. This story reminded me of stories in his Consequences series and also of his writing and storytelling style; and that is meant as high praise.
One Thing Always Gets Me
In so many of these stories the wife "loves" her husband, who makes sweet love to her, but sometimes they "need" to be "taken'>
Does it never occur to them to mention that to their husbands? True, some guys just may not have it in them to treat their wives like that, but why not at least give him the chance before cheating on him?
And in the case of this story, she can't be as intelligent as she would have us think if she thought he got a divorce petition between her arrest and her coming home. He obviously was already working on it and was either going to serve her then anyway, or it seemed like a good time to do it.
Sad Story
Being a student of human behavior I always find these types of stories very sad. Which tells me that you too are a student of behavior of sorts. Otherwise, you wouldn't be able to develope such realistic characters and believable scenarios that make your stories very plausible. Thank you, very entertaining, sad but entertaining and that is the goal of the author. To evoke a response and entertain, Well done
WHY IS IT SO HARD TO FACE THE TRUTH
and what makes it so scary. TK U MLJ LV NV
Good to see
When it isn't blaming the victim and the cheater actually pays a price.
You can really get on a RAAC roll around here at times.
Good Read***
Thanks for sharing.
Oh come on
He could have at least given her an opportunity to apologize; despite all the facade of a tender lover, Clint appears quite vindictive and repressed; he is probably too intense for a worldly wise Susan anyway. Adultery is not alright, as much as craving for love and spurning the one who is loved is.
good span of writing
I started with your latest story on 10/14, and then came back to your first alphabetically, which was also your very first submittal on 7/11. You are a very good author, and I intend to read all your stories now in between the two dates.
This story is unique in that the 2 pictures captured her state of mind - in love in the beginning, and in lust for power and sex in the second. We don't know how the second was obtained (perhaps a PI), but the personality change was obvious. That change ruined her life, and she lost someone who loved her very much.
He can forgive, but never forget. Well done!
The DJ
denial
she seems to be in denial as to her actions or blaming others for them
Another
excellent one. For someone who was supposed to be so smart...
thanks anon 10-02-14...
... for the laugh. What exactly would an apology do? Nothing. From her it would just be justification for her misbehaviour, and she knew what she was doing 100%. Even if you're the most kindest lover in the world you shouldn't be forced to listen to someone who hurt you in such an intimate capacity
Re-Reading
“It's just that I need that something extra from Charles that Clint just can't provide."
Not to repeat myself, but how does she know that Clint “can’t” provide that “something extra” if she never ASKS for it?
99.99%
Enjoyed this, but I think you missed one little opportunity (in my opinion). I don't think you needed to add "She screamed." at the end. It wasn't really required (the reader can fill in their own desired reaction). But more to the point, I love the idea of ending the story with the exact same quote you used to start it.
Also, if you were to change it, maybe modify the opening quote slightly. You have a comma after the second "Take it," . . . That could be a period to match the ending quote. . . or maybe an exclamation point (but then use the exclamation on the ending quote too).
Karma's a Bitch
Great story - ha ha ha - she got what she deserved - it couldn't have happened to a more deserving person.
5*
I love these stories. FM has a great way with words. Although it would have been a better tag line to have as the last sentence
"Clint had again not photographed her as he saw her' But most readers can pick that up. (As well as it was probably Clint. and/or Jennifer who blew the whistle!)
four stars
I would have given you five but you let the whore off way to fucking easily. Jail time was in order. Lesser offense, certainly, but no jail time, not a chance.
Missing or Extra?
The divorce aspect seemed like an extra ... Felt like it was just "there" as a footnote. It left me with a "missing" feeling especially when you wrapped the ending in a photo. It felt like emphasis placed on a nonessential portion of the tale.
Same Old Story
"I know, Jen, but he just doesn't do it for me anymore."
So divorce him!
ego plus arrogance
equals
self absorption and oblivion.
He'll never figure it out and catch me equals famous last words.
Formula for Cheating
When a person's intelligence is exceeded by their arrogance - they will cheat. No matter how smart they are, no one can commit the perfect crime. There is always evidence, there is always at least one witness, often arrogant people confess to others to heighten their sense of superiority.
Talked?
"If only we could have talked, maybe I could have changed his mind. Why would he never talk to me?"
Why couldn't YOU ever talk to him? If only you could have talked about what you wanted maybe he could have given it to you!
Story was missing something
I realize stories have an energy and life decided by the muse-ings (sic) of the author, and indeed this is another of your fine efforts.
Perhaps the muse will lead you to an expanded story where Clint's experiences and actions (along with Jennifer's?) would be interspersed to dramatic effect.
****
Came back and retread this... It is missing a piece. The last two parts are almost "oh by the way...".
Really like the writing.
The Mole
I would hazard a guess that Clint in his investigation of her affair was bugging her, and that's how he found out about the fraud, and turned over his tapes to the FBI.
Second time through...
Still five stars. Still love it. Started very strong but the ending left me wanting. He chose to never tell her why he was divorcing her, until much later. Why then? Was he the one who tipped off the Feds? Why would she be upset at his revelation? She didn't seem to ever give a flip before. What does this knowledge now make a difference.
A good one, hits close to home
My wife left me because of reuniting with an old boyfriend. I knew he had hurt her badly when he popped her cherry, but it wasn't until she left me that I found she was a size queen. Now, my dick isn't small, 7"x6.5" so while not super long, very thick. However, when I walked into my house after a truck didn't show up at our worksite, I wasn't prepared for the size of what I found. My wife was on her knees on the couch and Tom was pounding into her from the back. It could only be called a small pole. My epiphany? No wonder she never felt that tight to me, after fucking him for two years before us.
She saw me and screamed, Tom shouted and pulled that fucking log out of her cunt, spewing sperm everywhere. I told her I wanted her gone for a few hours while I got hold of myself and almost laughed when they drove off together. In one hour and fifteen minutes, I erased myself from her life. Not even a picture was left behind. That included her phone, in her haste she left that too and I deleted them all.
I never spoke to her again. Hurt, I hooked up to our fifth wheel and drove away. Sitting on a mountaintop and camping on top of the world, I sat with a cheap laptop and wrote a book. It took me six weeks and 5 days. The editing took another four days and then I contacted my sister, an agent with, well, I'm not going to say. A large prestigious agency.
Joni was stunned to say the least. While she had a PhD in literature and a few other things, I was a high school graduate. She tweaked it a bit, then introduced it to her agency. Penguin picked it up and basically, I was set for life in a couple different ways. One, I could not only write, but rqim I could produced novels in the 100K word count range every three months, maximum. I still produce them in 4-6 weeks generally.
We didn't do all this until our divorce was settled. Josie didn't want a divorce but I told the court I refused to be married to a cheating whore. Yes, I said that, verbatim. A $2,000 fine stopped my mouth after that, but Josie knew I was done. We were divorced in 4 months and she moved in with Tom. I stayed on my mountaintop and wrote more and when my first printing was released, `100,000 copies, they sold out in ninety days. The second printing, increased by two and a half, sold out in another 18 months. By then, my name was all over our hometown and my ex tried to come back into my life.
Josie had left Tom because she learned fucking a cheater is just that, fucking a cheater. He couldn't stay with just her and when he left, or she kicked him out, I could care less which, he left her a gift. It was one that left warts and all sorts of nasty things down there. She used the premise of having me sign a copy to get in my trailer door and told me how much she loved me. Yeah, I saw her love in action.
I've written and had published fourteen books now. A great fanbase is being produced and they all have sold well. Josie? Well, she still stops in but I let her talk to my wife now. A wonderful redhead I met on a signing tour and we are head over heels in love.
Re-Reading
“he loves me completely – he'd never do anything to hurt me." – Until YOU hurt HIM!
"I guess Clint did hear the news, and now he's deserting me. So much for 'for better or worse.'" – As KarenE said, he couldn’t have gotten the divorce petition that quickly, so he wasn’t “deserting” her because of her arrest, he obviously found out about her affair and was already prepared to dump her cheating ass!
“And I thought he was committed to our marriage!" – She’s one to complain about “commitment”!
"I never guessed she was talking about herself," – She has no right to be angry, Jennifer warned her!
-1*
If you use law enforcement you need to be on the money. As soon as you lawyer up the questioning stops. Plus to jail somebody you have to charge them. Bail is based on something.
The story got to phony to be good.
I have read and liked some of your work. Be real in the future.
MCPO Jim
mediocre
An arogant boss, a beautiful intelligent wife, a handsome laid back husband and a friend with a friendly warning .... around these one dimensional characters a very thin story evolved ......
Not one of the best tales from our Francis.
3*
LOL
"Take it, Bitch, take it."
Loved it. 5*
BEWARE the Facebook profile at dearbornmt@yah** Unless you want to give up personal info to a potential phishing scam or become an unwitting part of some potential psych study or potential blackmail scheme.
Laurel and company don't seem to want to do anything about this but please don't put yourself at risk.
Practice Safe Internet Perversion!
foolscap
You do indeed have a fool's cap on!
Facebook profile of dearbornmt@yahoo.com is none of your paranoid warnings.
The profile provides some of the TRUE, REAL, AND FACTUAL details of how a unrepentant serial cheating wife and college instructor in Helena Montana used that position to get a married male student of hers to engage in an adulterous affair. Before, during and after that affair, a number of other female instructors violated the college's Student Confidentiality Policy and engaged in spreading false rumors and making slanderous comments about the student. Those actions damaged the student's reputation and marriage not to mention the psychological stress he endured. He was being harassed but because he was a white, middle-aged, construction worker seems a number of prejudiced assumptions were made. An older female who was the instructor's Dept Head basically stated she thought the student, whom she had never met-she judged by appearances only, was a knuckle-dragging sexual predator planning on sexually assaulting the instructor.
A person close to the student believed he should be vindicated, although the damage could never be fully undone. The rumors had been repeated too often, spread to far and believed by too many.
I applaud foolscap's intentions but in this case they are misplaced and without merit
dearbornmt@yahoo dope...
Unless you can provide a usable Facebook (or any other kind of) link then it matters not if you are real or a phisher.
pics or it didn't happen.
A PICTURE AND 1000 WORDS
and the quote is accurate and appropriate, TK U MLJ LV NV
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to A Portrait of the Artist or
More submissions by FrancisMacomber.