All Comments on 'Cleveland Playtime'

Great hot build-up and I loved the foreplay in the bar. Hope you'll share more. The ending was a little weak.

Got both me and willie hot. By the time we were done reading he was hard as a rock and i was ready for him. Keep writing. Kisses Bette...

As elsewhere, a little dialogue would help, and I for one wouldn't mind if you extended your stories into a second page, particularly if it's a stand-alone story.

Wish I could have been with you guys. Sounds like a lot of fun. Thank you for the hot story!

good story great descriptions , got me hot xx

Not too long at all. Wished it was longer. Your stories are hot as usual.

I loved the whole story, great story telling...just enough details!

Reminds me of a fun night. Very hot. I'll keep my eyes open for part 2.

I agree with several of the comments. Not too long at all. Just the right amount of set-up and fast thrilling read. You are amazing

The length was perfect Tiki and almost reads like a personal experience. wink wink

Was an interesting story tried to give you 5 stars but again clicked but nothing happened not sure what the problem is but did enjoy it. Come on to my house my house :) !

Ward

Guess it finally did let me give you a 5 star rating not sure why you didn't get anymore reviews.

Ward

Another hot one from Tiki - getting us all 'slick and sticky'! Tiki's stories all have that feel of down-to-earth realism that makes them so much more erotic than those that are way out there in the stratosphere of fantasy. This one reminds us of a similar incident that happened to us... but that's another story.

Tiki, your stories are never long enough. Just like I'm sure I could never get enough of you, your detailed descriptions are very erotic. I have trouble keeping things in the present sometimes, you seem to have good skills with that.

One of the writing hints I picked up from my sci-fi writing is to start in the middle of things, where "the game is afoot". You could probably cut the front of this in half and double the back end easily, where the action is.

But I know how hard that can be when you've just made yourself come!

Good work nonetheless, looking forward to reading everything you write!

I love Tiki's direct approach to writing, I can feel her experiences in every line and envy her all the time, lol. What she misses in gramma and skill she makes up in style and this lady has style all of her own, awesome! More please!

Jean

From the land down under

of yours is ever too long!

THEY ARE ALL TOO SHORT!

More, baby, more he cries out.