All Comments on 'You Can't Throw Everything Away Ch. 03'

Stupid lawyer, I would not hire a cloud surfer like this.

I enjoy his use of words and the words he doesn't use. He gets the job done without a loy of extra window dressing. This was amusing and a little sad. Thanks for all the work!

These characters bear a further exploration, I think. Yes, the story could end here, but the relationships can be explored in more depth following the chaos, yes?

Great idea, but the characters were made out to be yoo simple. Everybody that writes cheating stories now on this site try to make it so hard with theirs reasons and results it has become a competition between writers to see who has the silly story.

REVIEW the facts --The husband has been going thorugh hell for months. The wife has been involved is evil twisted soul crushing emasculating scheme.

Upon finding out that there was NO book... that the wife has been fucking someone else for Months... finding out this whole loooong drawn out agony is part of the wife 's scheme.. what does he do?

The husband asks the wife One last time

"Don't you want to save this marriage?" he asked. "I'm doing all the work, here."

is this like a fucking joke????

The coach stayed the same so the game plans were championship caliber but the actual execution of great ideas was borderline slipshod.

Shuttlepilot bears watching in future.The story theme of women twisting mass-think of daytime TV to fit personal agendas was incendiary ! The 2nd part with scenes of husband in counseling with wife held flashes of great promise.

I'll let other comments point out leigon of points for future improvement except for one. Please no more idealist heroes whose vocation is that of lawyer. It's kind of a oxymoron - that un'.

The story idea needed to be developed a bit more. Not that it's plot premise isn't good, for it really is (and I liked the "twist"). However, there is a distinct difference between intent and execution. The same issues that seemed to be part of Ch. 2, were present in this installment.

On the other hand, there is still a great potential that is waiting to be let loose.

For that reason, I did enjoy the story, at least until the end, where it sort of petered out.

Still, I will continue to read Pilot's latest submissions, as I suspect they'll only get better.

But, as others have said, the story line was too sketchy. At times it seemed more like an outline of the story. I suppose that last sentence is a bit harsh, but this could have been a much better story if it was fleshed out a bit more.

That said, the plot was pretty good, although I never felt the emotions from the Husband that I think you were trying to express.

GO BRONCOS

I agree with HDK: You have a nice economy of words, and you generally pick the right ones to most succinctly convey what you wish to convey. This is far harder than most readers think, and it's the sign of someone with talent.

I also agree with HarryinVA: After hubby learns of the whole twisted scheme, he's still trying to give her one last shot at saving the marriage? When she confronts him angrily again, no less? Really? For fuck's sake . . . I mean, really?

Regarding the gibberish comments, I also agree with them, but they're easily rectified. The biggest obstacle to reading the entire piece was that you didn't separate the scenes with a line of ***** or +++++ or -----. That would've clued us in that the characters were now elsewhere in a different setting. While it may sound minor, it adds tremendously to the overall plot.

One final recommendaton: He learned of the cheating and then just moved on. Period. No reflection or anything. This gives up a lot of the emotional charge you spent two previous chapters building.

Still, I enjoyed this, and I hope you post something more soon.

Thanks!

everything in this chapter felt rushed. Wanna try again with more feeling... and editing?

I actually enjoyed the counselor. She was not your typical man hating, fault finding harridan bitch.

I believed the character of Jeanette and Eileen, strangely enough...as seperate people.

I liked his bout of trucker therapy.

I didn't like the maudaulin 'woe is me' attitude in the first chapter. His reactions seemed a bit ridiculous to me, and that tainted the whole story, IMO.

There are many other things to say about this story but you have to want to hear them. Send me a comment if you want to hear it.

the spider starts to spin another. TK U MLJ LV NV

There is more coming - I want to see it!

CH4. I know you are still around quit commenting on other stories and finish this one!

The ending was a great one too -

She was a pig and a slut and stoopid - malicious and vicious - the world cannot beat on her too much.

For him to walk into a relationship with 2 new awesome women who accept each other, too - woof dream come true heh - Oh and he is a successful, rich lawyer too lol -

and that is why were are here! gve it a 5 for entertainment. just a little more character development and conclusion might help - but hey this isn't a dickens novel, you did good.

At the end Jeannette and Eileen & Bill seem to be going on a Cruise. 1. How did the B!tch react to seeing 2 other women Smothering her guy .

2. How did everyone do afterwards. 3. How did Bill do personally and Professionally.

2*

Your writing is very good, not withstanding other comments, e.g. Rehnquist. However I've difficulty with the wife's attitude throughout. She wanted to stay married didn't she. I mean, she followed him to the door screaming at him and was described by her friend as distraught. Surely she must realise that he hasn't cheated and therefore there's no way he's going to admit it. So where's plan b? Back off from a losing fight and reconcile - she can still keep her lover (much as I'd personally hate that!). But to push her marriage to the point of a divorce she doesn't want, while being given chance after chance by her husband just makes no sense. I've come to realise that too many LW stories really feature STUPID woman, and so i've deducted two stars. 3 stars for the writing. I hope to read more from you in the future.

Best,

M

This is a wonderful idea that you did not close properly. The story needed another chapter where her true nature would be brought out in the court one layer at a time.

What a sneaky conniving bitch ! He never cheated on her, this was a ploy. The gutter slut has been cheating on him for 3 years! How stupid is this husband, why didn't he think of that, obviously she was having an affair & just tried to flip the guilt onto him... Dumb & dumber

Another wimp. The bitch gets away too easily..

exactly is Joanne's motivation? She had it all. A loving husband who treats her well and is good in the sack, her disparaging comments notwithstanding. A lover whom she's been fucking for three years and about whom her husband is clueless. Why then does she provoke a needless confrontation at the end of which she loses both her husband and her lover? Did she have a death wish?

A sequel explaining Joanne's POV would be nice.

A huge freaking deal is made back and forth over the entirety of chapter 2 between the characters, about this book that she supposedly read that featured him in it. Yet the first thing that happens in Chapter 3 is her revelation that the book never existed, and that she's been cheating for the last 3 years.

Then of course there's him - she never admits outright that she violated her vows, yet the first thing he does is sleep with Jeanette and Eileen before the divorce is even granted? Despite all his simping about his personal values and how he wasn't raised that way? After all that, he has no clue that she actually cheated on him, and he goes and does the same thing? He basically pissed away his ethics. Nice to see a male lead character who is actually a little hypocritical and human, but yick. Great story otherwise, but two stars for the pointless side-trip into chapter 2. Had this been shortened to the first and third chapters, it would have been a lot better.

This final chapter doesn't seem to fit with the first two, I'm left with the feeling you rushed it so that you could finish it yet brought up things in this chapter that were at odds with things said in the previous chapters.

Disappointing would be how I rate this, I expected more of this chapter and feel you have let yourself down with it.

Only 3*

You made a big deal out of examining the feelings and emotions of three out of the four people involved (Jeanette got short changed in that regards and I'm not sure why she's on the cruise) and then, WHAM BAM, you end the story. Did you run out of ideas? I felt like I fell off a cliff with the abbreviated ending.

He gets two women and a new life in his 30's. fucking works for me.

The night of the tenth anniversary, there was a confrontation that you should have written out. Instead you spend a chapter and a half trying to get the reader to understand a conversation they never read. It really was unclear what her motives were. She was trying to get him to divorce her, but she wanted to fight it? Most of the story, you make it out to be a likely situation of her wanting her cake and eat it too, but then WHY didn't she keep her mouth shut? Why was she trying to provoke him? What was it she really hoped to gain?? If she was trying to fuck with his mind, in order to get him to accept becoming a willing cuckold, then she REALLY fucked that up, but also, it didn't really seem like her true intent. She seemed more like a stupid, selfish bitch who didn't KNOW what she wanted. We meander around in hubby's confused mind, waiting for him to figure things out, and slowly he does. But he doesn't seem all that bright either. So we are left with 3 chapters telling us that stupid people do stupid things and eventually even a stupid judge can see the overall stupidity and grant a stupid divorce so the stupid people can go off to do stupid things with OTHER stupid people. With skill you could have shrunk this down to two pages, conveyed the same exact message, and conserved a lot of energy for yourself while sparing your audience a lot of confusion.

My opponent has this guy as his lawyer. What a dumbass.

The whole 3 chapters were convoluted garbage that just went around in circles.

If you had a brain you could turn what you call convoluted garbage into a work of writing excellence.

Some people will never get it.

5*

Enjoyable series...I liked your characters (even mild mannered Bill, who was a bit thick). Gotta wonder how he lasted so long with JoAnne, though...

fresh air, good company and the relaxing sea, and humpty will be back, but dumpty it is unknown, TK U MLJ LV NV

the marriage counselor.

and yes, his now ex wife did throw out everything

In ch.01 there is a book and JoAnne lends it to Jeanette

In ch.02 there is a book and JoAnne shows it to Dr. Hadley

But in ch.03 there is no book and JoAnne gloats about it to her lover

You fucked me up with this one. The wife was a cheating cunt who manufactured all her Oprah and The View bullshit. All to make her husband look like the bad guy. Well, he was a good guy and the cunt would up alone in the end.

Low score because you lied by omission about the whore and then rushed the ending.

Fuck

This didn't seem to mold with the first two chapters....it seemed rushed and it didn't really explain the wives motives....than the court case was like 3 paragraphs...

but too many mistakes.The husband gets exasperated but then is too calm after he knows there was no book and that she's having an affair. She deserves to suffer but none of this is played out properly.He doesn't confront her. I gave you two stars but you could get 5 with a re-write and a proper finish to the story.

... but, man, was it disjointed at the end. I've read some stories that were rushed to a conclusion but this one just might take the cake.

Finish the story..You left me hanging..

The story had a few doses of reality to it. But, like iced tea left too long in the sun, it was just too watered down to still be tasty. For example, a lawyer (even a corporate lawyer) that doesn't suspect cheating when she starts all this crap, especially on their anniversary? No family involvement (his or hers) telling her what a stupid idiot she was being? And where was Philip's wife in all of this? I'm sure she would be very curious about a husband that 'took too long,' especially after she learned her spouse was a cheating, lying piece of shit. Best of luck on the next one.....

With no warning at all he quits the law firm, then he's going to the back and changing accounts??????? I'm sorry, I liked this for a while but the transitions need a lot of work!

But poor execution. Similar to other comments, it was difficult keeping up with the story line. No clear breaks, sudden and unexpected transitions and huge leaps in the story line and plot. I enjoyed the concept but would like to see this story much more refined.

Thanks and please keep writing (but get an editor next time).

The lawyer is written as if the writer only knows a housewives' world.

One thing I would think is that you got bored at the end and didn't know what to say. This chapter was in my humble opinion the most important one and at the end it got hard to follow through. It died out just as it got interesting. It really does need to be fleshed out more! Also in chapter two, we don't know why he up and dissolved his partnership.

Thanks for the offering....

seem to learn too late about forgiveness, TK U MLJ LV NV

Needed a better ending.

Jumped around by character, location, and scenes, without warning. Started out okay, even if pretty much unbelievable that a wife would castrate her husband just because of something Oprah said. Of course, if a wife that dumb existed, she would definitely be the type to watch Oprah and the View.

Transitions were horrible or non-existent. More importantly, the story itself didn't make a lot of sense. They had just started with the counselor when, the next morning, the husband starts closing cards and accounts as if the divorce was already decided. He's finally told his wife is cheating on him and he acts totally unconcerned. Then, after sleeping with his admin, he apparently is going to also be sleeping with his ex-wife's best friend??? I don't know, it was kinda hard to follow at the end. It's like the author was trying to say that, yeah, he's getting divorced from a sleazy wife, but he's so adorable that two women are fighting over him now and they finally decide they'll share! Fantasy time, I'm kinda surprised he didn't also win the state lottery.

The story was a bit like trying to work a jigsaw puzzle that's missing quite a few pieces.

She was already cheating on him and used the book and Oprah shit to throw him off so she could keep him off balance. BUT....he was a lawyer and should have seen SOMETHING WAS WRONG! As soon as she started that shit, he should have put a PI on her! Bad ending.

that useless cunt, Oprah, fucked my marriage up too.

I'd come home at the end of the day, my ex would go up one side of me and down the other about this thing I did wrong, or that thing, or everything.

I hope Oprah burns in fucking hell. I really do.

Crap is what you hear!

They just never did anything interesting. The writing was good, but I just kept waiting for something to happen and it never did. Four stars for the writing and the characters.

Really...despite the gripping tale you've shared all I can think about is going from Mopar to Chevy. 1970 muscle car madness to sedate, safe 21st century tedium on wheels. Mopar to Chevy, and a box of model trains too. Our guy is in his mid 30's right? Yet he reads more like a old man in his 60's, maybe his 70's...maybe.

I gonna take a wild flyer here. You had about half a dozen maybe ten partially written, maybe even barely started stories and ideas scattered around the old hard drive. And you had a near psychotic rage against Oprah and The View (not that such a feeling is unusual.) strangely you did like the idea of baking, sleuthing about, and that odd fetish regarding the monthly centerfold in Model Railroader magazine...yeah baby, move your caboose onto my siding. Anyway, for some completely whacked reason the names Croteau, Delacroix, and Hiquet held deep and powerful meaning for you. And then there's the oatmeal raisin cookie crumbs on the floor - disturbing - well I could go on. But really - why?

I'd like to see a little more closure. Still 5 stars.

"Bill left Marie Callender's and drove to Bank of America"

Who??

An interesting twist on a hackneyed theme. Well above average and ntertaining but begs the question: How could he have been married to her for 10 years and not noticed that she was a selfish, conniving bitch?

LA

Too many inconsistencies. Nice try on covering the Joanne - Joanie mess, but just made it even more awkward (use the search and replace function. ) Other comments have covered most of the other disconnects. BTW, Marie Callender's is a restaurant chain.

We needed to see more of JoAnne's reaction to the divorce. Story was good but just quit mid sentence.

... and not her. At the end, her reaction doesn’t matter. He’s moving on with two women in his life. He has hope for the future. What more does he need? I like the way Pilot laid out his inner struggle. It felt real. Good story.

I believe we need to know more about JoAnne's life afterward. What it's like that day, the day after, the week after, one year after, and so on; whether she learned anything or if she'll keep self-destructing.

Then the story seemed to fall off a cliff. He's getting step up in the new office. He's entered into a physical relationship with Eileen. Jeanette is hanging around for some reason. And suddenly JoAnne wants to save their marriage. Why did he suddenly start to have sex with Eileen when the divorce isn't over? Why would he just give the house to JoAnne? And the hell did Eileen and Jeanette turn into bisexual, three way lovers? Too much, too fast. WTF?

2 stars

It was short and the ending felt super rushed.

Did it have all the makings of a GREAT story? yes!

I loved most of this story and plot. But we never got the confrontation of JoAnne that's been slowly building the entire story, we never fully learned why she accused him of cheating other than a hasty deflection. We never even read about JoAnne's reactions, and their final dialogues together were choppy and confusing at best. Those could have been your BEST lines, and they wound up being weird and incomplete as sentences.

It's a good story, but needs polishing. Especially your final chapter. You leaving her reactions out of it is ultimately your choice. But I'd at least consider polishing up what you'v already written to be more cohesive.

How did this this disaster get such high ratings?? I'm really losing faith in the people in this section.

Not sure what happened with this story but when I started reading chapter 3 I thought I was reading a totally different story and jumped back to chapter 2 to check. The only thing I can think of is that the author lost control of the story and didn't know where to take it.

That's the most polite way to put it. Nothing made sense. A lawyer who doesn't sense anything's amiss?? Who doesn't take the betraying spouse over the coals? Who doesn't questions the suit which is thrown at him? Nah! 1* for the whole series!

I mean , it was obvious she had a long term boyfriend from the first sentence of the first part .

Nothing surprising here

Just glad you didn't force a reconciliation with the whore .

Story really needs some formatting, at least a few line breaks when switching from one scene to another. Made it tough to follow when everything's uniform like this. As for the story itself, the setup was intriguing, but the pacing was all over the place. Stretched out at the beginning and then rushed at the end. Cutting out most of the repetitive refrains in the first two parts and fleshing out the end would've improved it considerably IMO.

5 stars - I liked it

I need to know what happend to all concerned, we need a follow up story.

let oprah and dr phil fix that

Well, I guess the selfish cunt proved “You CAN throw everything away.”

Even though this story is a decade old, it just amazes me that after 3 chapters with plenty of detail and an obvious conclusion, someone still cry’s out for the story to be finished.

Good read, sorry this author hasn’t posted anything for many years.

Would’ve liked to see the ex wife’s reaction to the divorce dissolution. Shame we didn’t see it or indeed her married lover dumping her. So many loose ends at the finish.

4/5 because of the incomplete ending of the story.

what happen.

The story well written the ending just didn't happen

Confusing as anything. A fairly good story to end so shitty. Lots of grammar mistakes made parts difficult to read.

It was quite obvious SHE was the one cheating🙄.. hes a complete idiot...how did he not know she had a boyfriend for 3yrs? How did it never occurred to him she was the one cheating? Why didn't her accusations anger him enough to to call her on her bullshit? This idiot is supposed to be a lawyer😭😭😭😭😭😭.. He was such a little wimp.. so if it wasn't for her friend he still would've been sitting there crying talking about saving a marriage that's been dead for 3yrs.?. Aren't lawyers supposed to be smart?🤭.. she lost respect for him the longer her affair went on because he's an IDIOT.. nothing sexy about moron.. she was laughing at him with her lover at his stupidity.. you know what? So was I 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤭.. I just couldn't believe the level of stupidity... there was really no confrontation, no talking to the slut.. the author spent 4 series , I assumed leading up to the confrontation and divorce but that part of the story was just a mentioned.. it wasn't as in depth as I expected from such a long story .. all that buildup and the 3nd just falls flat.. very unsatisfying.. I also would've liked to know why she suddenly wanted to stay married? She clearly hasn't loved or respected him for 3yrs.. that's even if she ever respected and loved at all.... reading the little parts where we did get to read the sluts thought process, she saw her ex boyfriend at the mall and basically started back dating him like they were in high school again.. she didn't put up much of a fight.. she saw him, and they started banging.. been banging for 3yrs now.. suddenly after her liver drops her she wants to stay married.. why? I would've thoroughly enjoyed her trying to explain a 3yr affair.. I didn't like this story.. it was just stupid and boring as fuck🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤭

Mostly 4 star story, 3 stars for the last chapter. I liked the twist that the wife was less of a clueless idiot and more of a self centered dbag who wanted a hubby and a lover, eventually hoist by her own petard as her carefully crafted plan blew up in her face. It was a little odd he kept staying with her despite all the abuse, I was fairly sure from the first chapter this would turn into some "missing husband" story with either him falling in love with someone else or some attempt at reconciliation. Him coming home was unexpected but odd. Lower score this chapter for the abrupt ending.

Other than the MC being so unbelievably naive .... no, clueless and weak ..... it was still an interesting story. The author could have spent less pages on the repetitive circular dialogue and more on the wife's crash later, but all-in-all I enjoyed it.

WEHRE IS THE ENDING?

Needs an ending and FIX THE TAGS!

Storyline was very difficult to follow at the end. Very disjointed. No consequences for the wife. She got the house and cashed out. Husband was an idiot and let her walk all over him. The story could have been much better if he wasn’t an idiot and she had consequences. Also didn’t he go away with both women in the end? Not very clear end but none of this writers stories have a ending

Confusing in a word.

He gets both of them?? Way to go!! and congratulations for dumping the cheating bimbo.

Esto fue el final? En serio?

Story got worse as it went on. In fact the wife is not bran dead, she is a conniving Machievallian cheater with quite possibly the dumbest plan of all time to continue her affair with Philip. What a moronic "scheme". It might have been one thing to accuse him if cheating. Still can backfire and the blaming it on the book made no sense. But as soon as she complained about him taking too long (implying that maybe Philip is a quicker draw, dunno), she emasculated and eviscerated him. The two things together after 11 years (10 of marriage) is too much. She is clearly a narcissist but quite a dim bulb. She didn't think anything through. Even Philip mentioned about her frank insult about the MC in bed not doing it for her. That was stupid. Well you reap whatbyou sow. Three year long affair. While he worked and traveled. Occam's principle held true to form thatbshe was the cheater. But it didn't account for her utter stupidity. Now she gets hosed in the divorce, gets a one time alimony payment and the house, but lost Philip (how could retribution not be coming via Philip's wife learning from thr MC). MC had no clue for three years. Her comments made him question everything. Even without her adultery, he was going to divorce her. She really is brain dead. Not indoctrinated. Just stupid and selfish.

This story sets some kind of record for the volume of useless, redundant, irrelevant, non-germane, repetitive, uninteresting and confusing details, facts, tidbits, observations and dead-end scenes. MC confronts the wife but never mentions her affair, yet continues to battle her accusations with essentially the protracted version of, "Nuh-uuuuh!" So many wasted opportunities for a climactic moment, which is the payoff for any story, but OP just pisses it away in a welter of repeated, pointless dialogue. All three stories could be condensed to a 2K-3K story that might be readable. Awful!