All Comments on 'Just One of Many Pt. 02'

And the Feds (FBI) would never allow a local officer to be the in person protection for a witness. Further, the uptight FBI (or any Fed agency) would provide at least TWO agents, at least one of which would be female to guard a Female Witness.

Just my 2 cents...

Nice story though, keep it coming...

maybe I'm just being picky, but in chapter 1, Chris was 34, now he's 24?

Firstly, I'm enjoying the story. I'd noticed he lost ten years off his age between chapters, and that him sleeping in the same bed as the girl he was trying to protect on numerous occasions with twenty agents around seems unrealistic, but I'm enjoying it anyway.

What I find really disconcerting, and I can't say it's a mistake, is the author's way of having one character say something, then on the same line the next thing is the other character's reaction. For example, Cat will say something, followed by "Chris smiled."

I find it confusing who is speaking and suggest it would be easier to follow if the reaction of the person not speaking was the start of the next paragraph.