A Maiden's Tale

Please continue!! so good!!!

Excellent first try!

Can't wait for more...

I wish I could say this in a palatable way... Your writing reads with the same cadence as Japanamation sounds. I get that you want her to be a very eager slave, but going from sickly virginal daughter to begging to be ass fucked...? Also, why is a sickly virginal daughter so generously proportioned during the time period that includes Debtors prison?

MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

loved it, when's more coming out?

Response

To the person that wrote how can a sickly person have a desirable form... When I was a kid I was always sick with brochitis sick to the point of hospitialization and being tube fed cuz i couldnt breath when I tried to swallow not to mention the coughing fits. Yet when I was 18 I was a 36D with a trim waist and child baring hips so you tell me how that works? Genetics are a wonderful thing your going to get what your going to get regardless of your health.

And you're how old?

Seriously? You equate growing up with bronchitis within the last 50 years to being sickly during the Edwadian era? Ignorant fool!! You exemplify the arrogance of those under 30. Your story sucks and you cannot defend it outside of,"it is what it is I guess."

2nd Response

You're correct that I am under 30 however, I don't remember saying that my story was set in edwardian times so there you go being presumptious yet again, and even 70 years ago getting the flu was deadly to most. Yet people who never would have been expected to live i.e infants whose parents had died from it would survive. And to be honest I never said what Elizabeth was sick with it could have been the common cold that she kept getting so for you to judge anything that I write as unreal is ludicrous and you need to find a different site. I apologize that my sickly character is abusing your sensibilities about having a desireable form. If it bothers you so much don't read my work there are thousands of other options out there for you.

Oh calm down. This is not the Time's best seller list. Yes, there are some inconsistencies with the time period and the language used but the bottom line is I was completely distraught to see it end so suddenly. Write more!!!

over all, a nice story. i felt kida left behinde at the ethusasim of the slave though. sounded like a real slut instead of a properly raised Lady in bondage.

tit flesh?

I couldn't finish reading (or anything else) because the writing was just awful. By the 3rd time "tit flesh" was used, I gave up. Don't think I am missing much.

Liked It.

A good start... Decent character development. Keep going !!