Him stabbing a needle through her nipples is major turn off.
The nylons and high heels are out of place in the medieval setting you started.
You coud have spent more time describing their actual sex but basically just wrote: he filled her and then fucked her hard... What lovely prose!
You should have been trying to make her submit to love, not submit her body. This is an incredibly sexist story that's demeaning to the female mind. The dragon man was such a great concept but you ruined it.
Though the last comment (by an anonymous source on 11/25/11) had a point about some things, I believe they could have phrased their critism more constructivly. You were a bit abrupt with the sexual aspect of the story. You never went into great detail about describing her (how tall/short, the color of her eyes, the shade of pink of her nipples) or in describing him. As this is a sex story, would it not be a good thing to tell us the measurments of his penis?
Otherwise, I thouroghly enjoyed this story and look forward to many more. I would be happy to edit for in order to create better "prose" (as the anonomous coward worded it).
I shall go to your page now and view other submissions (I so hope you have many more).
P.S. I found none of your story sexist. You were only writing of dom/sub subject line. But maybe you should put a warning before your stories for the squeemish if you have forced pleasure involved.
This is a love story. The way she fought him and the interplay, was well done. The fact she just didn't give in easily made it worthwhile. This was a well crafted story. I didn't find any editorial errors that caught my attention.
Someone made a comment about sexist, well, sex is sexist. Also, the stories on this site are of all types.
When it's time for your next story to be edited, please consider me to be your editor.
It was great, I really appreciated this story. It was probably the best I read so far. I am excited to read more from you!
by
Anonymous02/11/12
Ravishing
I love how you allow the readers to be able to apply their own imagination along with yours. You've given us a wonderful plot with details that we can add here and there on our own, such as the measurements of the lady and the lord. Excellent, please keep writing more.
My feelings about your story are quite ambivalent. It is well written - technically anyway - with just the right amount of description to make the tale come alive without drifting off into purple prose territory. Also, thank you for not describing the heroine's breasts with her bra size or giving us the exact inchage of the dragon's cock.
But (and here it comes)...
The emotional responses are ... disturbing, to say the least. Another reviewer called your story sexist, but I think that's actually off the mark. I'm curious - were you deliberately trying to write a chilling story, or was that an accident? Because as beautifully crafted as it is, I find myself with a bitter taste in my mouth.
Nothing against a D/s relationship. As a sexually submissive woman I actually enjoy stories about them very much. But what you described here is an abusive relationship. I find Bran rather disturbing, especially what you wrote about his background (training sex slaves to sell without any regard towards them); and I also found his treatment of Marged very disturbing. Essentially he rapes her (yes, what he does to her is rape, even if he makes her feel pleasure), manipulates her by addicting her to said pleasure and his presence (as she's deprived of all other human contact), and calmly waits for the Stockholm Syndrome to kick in. Which it does. With a venegance.
That is not romantic. Not in any sense of the word.
The focal point of any halfway functional D/s relationship is trust. I see none of that here. Even though Bran comes to accept Marged as his "mate", he does nothing to earn said trust. And he doesn't seem to trust her either - he never gives her a choice. He doesn't respect her. What Marged wants and feels is completely irrelevant to him, and he simply brainwashes her into becoming his perfect little woman without any regard for her desires and emotional needs. There is also the question why Marged would fall in love with him at all - nothing suggests that he's a likeable person, or even fun to talk to and hang out with.
This not sexist but the script of a third world arranged marriage -- where the girl realizes in spite of the media-fueled ball-breaking , castrative animosity she had towards the male sex he's fun ,attractive , sexy &nice to be around with &duly proceeds to fall in love with Hubby !!
It is not a man being cruel to a woman but a dragon taking it out on a human for all the centuries of demonization that went on in the human media against Dragons !! This is Dagonism !!
by
Anonymous04/18/12
female debasement.
I agree totally with Owlet. ALl this female domination, rape, coersion, kidnapping and submission is getting really old really fast. I understand that's is some people's fantasies, but I'm getting more than a little annoyed that women are always the brunt of this pervy fantasies. How would the story's 'hero' like it his member had candle wax dripped on it and then mutliated with a piercing?
Thought we were evolved past using women as chattel or property.
by
Anonymous05/24/12
love it.
As a fan of dragons and a love of BDSM this was a treat for me. Wish it had been more drawn out in her traning :-)
Usually I give low star ratings to stories that are poorly written, but that is not the case with Dragon Master. I'm generally opposed to anything more than mild bondage, but this was a compelling story. Ultimately it's not my thing, but very well done.
by
Anonymous07/03/12
Great Story
I personally loved this story. I don't know why people get offended so easily though. I mean come on chill the heck out, if you don't like it don't read it. Also if you don't like stories with women as chattel, there are plenty of stories with male slaves ;)
Like previously mentioned, there were a few but very minor grammatical errors. I loved this story! Please write more.
by
Anonymous02/04/13
It was nice
I liked it but I guess for me if its a force story I like the girl to fight and refuse the whole way I hate the sappy im a female and I should give in to be happy and love and what not idk I just think its a better story ending cuz if someone is forced yhuu wouldnt go oh god now I love yhuu again great story loved the detail just not a fan of the I now love yhuu without any anger endings lol
I think you should write a sequel to this story. I feel as if you left it open with intentions to write another chapter, but never got to it. Please write another part to this story!
Hoping that you listen to your fans and write a sequel. This could easily be turned into a book I would be willing to purchase and read more than once
by
Anonymous11/03/13
Excellent
When dozens of tumblr tier pseudofeminists complain about your story, you know you've done something right.
Was anyone really expecting a woman to be treated with kid gloves in a medieval fantasy story?
Was anyone actually surprised that there were plenty of BDSM themes in a story where the protagonist is chained up for 95 percent of its duration?
Was anyone really shocked by nipple piercings when we live in an age where teenagers stretch their earlobes with one inch tubes?
Was anyone really disgusted by mild BDSM in a story that happens to be on a site with a category dedicated to full-fledged rape scenarios?
The comment section is for constructive criticism. If you liked absolutely nothing about the story and yet were stupid enough to read it in its entirety, give it one star and go back to tumblr.
Great, but a little more development would make it even better!
I found this story very compelling, and enjoyed it very much, but like Owlet said it is slightly disturbing. I was thinking along the same lines as Owlet in regards to the addiction to pleasure and Stockholm Syndrome. Really all they did together was eat, sleep, and fuck; I didn't really buy that either loved the other, they had no opportunity to get to know each other. The story was definitely a turn on, but their relationship could use a little more development and, as others have said, a little grammatical editing wouldn't hurt. I think I would enjoy it even more if it was fleshed out into a chapter story, so the characters would have the opportunity to actually fall in love with each other. It would take more work, but judging on how much I enjoyed this story as it is I'm sure you could write a wonderful extended plot given the time and inclination.
by
Anonymous02/11/14
Weeeeooow!!!!
Please please please continue!!! Loved it!!! I knew she would jut because hey it's a story, but it was so good :) liked it a lot :)
Did she transform or will she stay moral...does her life span stay the same...did she meet her father. ..does set revenge on the mayor? I'm happy that she found love but it's not over....There needs to be one to this tale. A trilogy of sorts. Wishing you would continue because you just left us wanting more.
by
Anonymous05/18/14
Absolutely loved it....
I love your fantastic imagination, and how you chose to let the hero win the heart of the maiden...Anyone woman would be very lucky to experience such intense physical pleasure and then love at the same time. I wish it would happen to me. I like this sort of non-force pleasure and deep attachment, deep love and caring....Yes, please write more...Thank you. NHU
by
Anonymous05/25/14
Please continue
Please continue this sensual story. I love it!
by
Anonymous08/01/14
how is this love
Everyone like it's so great. For him. One of the greatest feeling a sub has is the power to stop..the sub is just as powerful as the Dom. But none of this is here just a rapist Dragon getting his rocks off.....lame and sad
The story was great! One of the best I've read in awhile! You must make more!! I would love to read what else could happen to her.
by
Anonymous08/04/14
please
I need more please pretty please
by
Anonymous09/17/14
difference
i love this story but it saddens me she did not find a way to get away from him at least once. He was so sure he could tame her but she had no way of fighting. i thought perhaps she would get hurt and he would have to not touch her or force himself on her but have to give her time to adjust or at least start to like him. i would absolutely love to see you write more. your talent is beautiful :) thank you for this story
a good read. imho the character development was a bit hurried, but over all, i really liked it...5 stars
by
Anonymous09/24/14
Love this story.
I've already read it multiple times and it is an amazing story. Wish there was a chapter 2 to see what becomes of them and her finding out about her dragon side. Well-written!
by
Anonymous11/17/14
wonderful story line
You made a wonderful story but i kinda wish you would continue the story plot i would gladly read every one you make thank you for the good read and pls pls consider making several more chapters to this story thank you ^_____^
Hello PassionSaintJohn.
The other writers who wrote to you were too kind! For God's sake, I estimate that you should be able to add at least three more installments! By the way, you are the first individual whom I have ever written to. That's how delightful your story is!
Now, divorce your spouse, render your resignation from your employment, and eat sparingly, until this tale is fully complete! I'm 68, and I wish to finish this tale before I pass, which the physicians have said is less than a year!
Don't let me down! I taught high school English for 33 years and , believe me when I say that, with work, you are truly on your way to being an excellent writer! Hang in there, and this work IS real entertaining and engrossing!
Best of luck, and don't forget my advice to you!
Sincerely,
Joe.
by
Anonymous02/08/15
I don't understand what is the point of breaking a person's will. It just doesn't make sense to me. It was a well written story, but to take a strong female with fire and break her down like that was disappointing.
by
Anonymous04/11/15
I wish you made Marged more resistant.
by
Anonymous04/30/15
:(
This was published in 2002? Is it at least possible for more?
by
Anonymous05/04/15
❤️❤️❤️
Love this story wish there was more installments,
by
Anonymous05/27/15
IN DESPERATE NEED
DAMMIT MAN, I'm with Joe on this on this one. T think we all know that you are aware that our mouths are watering and our hormones are raging for " THE REST OF THE STOREY". You write so well PassionStJohn, don't let us down, Please XOXO Kim
by
Anonymous07/11/15
Great story
This story was fantastic! I loved it. It is a classic! Thank you!
by
Anonymous02/12/16
I will admit that I have enjoyed the occasional rapey mindbreak or mind control story, but when a story tries to justify, rationalize or marginalize rape -- even if it's only implied or a consequence of the author not being brave enough to portray the protagonist bad guy as the amoral asshole he should have been -- I'm immediately squicked out.
by
Anonymous04/02/16
umm, no
It was well written, I'll give you that. And I come to this site for the rape stories, so it's not like that offends me. But, seriously, stockholm syndrome isn't love. And the rapist, who so casually refers to how the last girl he was training to sell into slavery leapt to her death to escape him, is not a romantic hero. Painting such an abusive relationship through rose-colored glasses actually killed the sexy factor for me, and I totally would have been into it, had you just been honest about what a bastard this guy is.
by
Anonymous04/06/16
Err
I'll admit, it is extremely well written but I felt a bit squeamish at the casual mentions of his previous lovers and their suicides (as someone else said). There is a fine line between writing erotica about ravishment fantasies and such but I think this one went a little bit too far.
by
Anonymous05/03/16
soooooooooooogooooooooood
I love the thought of love and dragons. How he tamed her and by love caused her to love him back. Hope to see more from this writer
English
Turn Off After Turn Off...
Him stabbing a needle through her nipples is major turn off.
The nylons and high heels are out of place in the medieval setting you started.
You coud have spent more time describing their actual sex but basically just wrote: he filled her and then fucked her hard... What lovely prose!
You should have been trying to make her submit to love, not submit her body. This is an incredibly sexist story that's demeaning to the female mind. The dragon man was such a great concept but you ruined it.
moderately enjoyed
Though the last comment (by an anonymous source on 11/25/11) had a point about some things, I believe they could have phrased their critism more constructivly. You were a bit abrupt with the sexual aspect of the story. You never went into great detail about describing her (how tall/short, the color of her eyes, the shade of pink of her nipples) or in describing him. As this is a sex story, would it not be a good thing to tell us the measurments of his penis?
Otherwise, I thouroghly enjoyed this story and look forward to many more. I would be happy to edit for in order to create better "prose" (as the anonomous coward worded it).
I shall go to your page now and view other submissions (I so hope you have many more).
P.S. I found none of your story sexist. You were only writing of dom/sub subject line. But maybe you should put a warning before your stories for the squeemish if you have forced pleasure involved.
Thank you so much for the entertainment.
A top notch story
This is a love story. The way she fought him and the interplay, was well done. The fact she just didn't give in easily made it worthwhile. This was a well crafted story. I didn't find any editorial errors that caught my attention.
Someone made a comment about sexist, well, sex is sexist. Also, the stories on this site are of all types.
When it's time for your next story to be edited, please consider me to be your editor.
It was great, I really appreciated this story. It was probably the best I read so far. I am excited to read more from you!
Ravishing
I love how you allow the readers to be able to apply their own imagination along with yours. You've given us a wonderful plot with details that we can add here and there on our own, such as the measurements of the lady and the lord. Excellent, please keep writing more.
Of Two Minds
My feelings about your story are quite ambivalent. It is well written - technically anyway - with just the right amount of description to make the tale come alive without drifting off into purple prose territory. Also, thank you for not describing the heroine's breasts with her bra size or giving us the exact inchage of the dragon's cock.
But (and here it comes)...
The emotional responses are ... disturbing, to say the least. Another reviewer called your story sexist, but I think that's actually off the mark. I'm curious - were you deliberately trying to write a chilling story, or was that an accident? Because as beautifully crafted as it is, I find myself with a bitter taste in my mouth.
Nothing against a D/s relationship. As a sexually submissive woman I actually enjoy stories about them very much. But what you described here is an abusive relationship. I find Bran rather disturbing, especially what you wrote about his background (training sex slaves to sell without any regard towards them); and I also found his treatment of Marged very disturbing. Essentially he rapes her (yes, what he does to her is rape, even if he makes her feel pleasure), manipulates her by addicting her to said pleasure and his presence (as she's deprived of all other human contact), and calmly waits for the Stockholm Syndrome to kick in. Which it does. With a venegance.
That is not romantic. Not in any sense of the word.
The focal point of any halfway functional D/s relationship is trust. I see none of that here. Even though Bran comes to accept Marged as his "mate", he does nothing to earn said trust. And he doesn't seem to trust her either - he never gives her a choice. He doesn't respect her. What Marged wants and feels is completely irrelevant to him, and he simply brainwashes her into becoming his perfect little woman without any regard for her desires and emotional needs. There is also the question why Marged would fall in love with him at all - nothing suggests that he's a likeable person, or even fun to talk to and hang out with.
Well, this is it in a nutshell.
owlet
An arranged marriage !
This not sexist but the script of a third world arranged marriage -- where the girl realizes in spite of the media-fueled ball-breaking , castrative animosity she had towards the male sex he's fun ,attractive , sexy &nice to be around with &duly proceeds to fall in love with Hubby !!
Not Sexist but Dragonist
It is not a man being cruel to a woman but a dragon taking it out on a human for all the centuries of demonization that went on in the human media against Dragons !! This is Dagonism !!
female debasement.
I agree totally with Owlet. ALl this female domination, rape, coersion, kidnapping and submission is getting really old really fast. I understand that's is some people's fantasies, but I'm getting more than a little annoyed that women are always the brunt of this pervy fantasies. How would the story's 'hero' like it his member had candle wax dripped on it and then mutliated with a piercing?
Thought we were evolved past using women as chattel or property.
love it.
As a fan of dragons and a love of BDSM this was a treat for me. Wish it had been more drawn out in her traning :-)
Not sure how to rate this
Usually I give low star ratings to stories that are poorly written, but that is not the case with Dragon Master. I'm generally opposed to anything more than mild bondage, but this was a compelling story. Ultimately it's not my thing, but very well done.
Great Story
I personally loved this story. I don't know why people get offended so easily though. I mean come on chill the heck out, if you don't like it don't read it. Also if you don't like stories with women as chattel, there are plenty of stories with male slaves ;)
Sequel? Or series?
Great story! I think you could make this into several stories!!! Please!!!
please?
More please please please
Enchanted
Though there were a few errors, nothing devastating and you've enchanted me with this story. Please do continue!
good story
Good story but cruel he's just using her oh well guess its a semi-happy story which is new
More?
Like previously mentioned, there were a few but very minor grammatical errors. I loved this story! Please write more.
It was nice
I liked it but I guess for me if its a force story I like the girl to fight and refuse the whole way I hate the sappy im a female and I should give in to be happy and love and what not idk I just think its a better story ending cuz if someone is forced yhuu wouldnt go oh god now I love yhuu again great story loved the detail just not a fan of the I now love yhuu without any anger endings lol
More!
I think you should write a sequel to this story. I feel as if you left it open with intentions to write another chapter, but never got to it. Please write another part to this story!
I just LOVE Dragons!!!
YAY!!!!!
That was INCREDIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hope there is sequel!!!!!
Need More
pls a sequel
This needs a sequel! Loved it
THAT WAS AWESOME!!! needs a sequel
It was awesome
Hoping that you listen to your fans and write a sequel. This could easily be turned into a book I would be willing to purchase and read more than once
Excellent
When dozens of tumblr tier pseudofeminists complain about your story, you know you've done something right.
Was anyone really expecting a woman to be treated with kid gloves in a medieval fantasy story?
Was anyone actually surprised that there were plenty of BDSM themes in a story where the protagonist is chained up for 95 percent of its duration?
Was anyone really shocked by nipple piercings when we live in an age where teenagers stretch their earlobes with one inch tubes?
Was anyone really disgusted by mild BDSM in a story that happens to be on a site with a category dedicated to full-fledged rape scenarios?
The comment section is for constructive criticism. If you liked absolutely nothing about the story and yet were stupid enough to read it in its entirety, give it one star and go back to tumblr.
Book
I agree this would be a great book!!!! Loved the story!!!!!!!!
Really a great story :D
Please continue the series.
Great, but a little more development would make it even better!
I found this story very compelling, and enjoyed it very much, but like Owlet said it is slightly disturbing. I was thinking along the same lines as Owlet in regards to the addiction to pleasure and Stockholm Syndrome. Really all they did together was eat, sleep, and fuck; I didn't really buy that either loved the other, they had no opportunity to get to know each other. The story was definitely a turn on, but their relationship could use a little more development and, as others have said, a little grammatical editing wouldn't hurt. I think I would enjoy it even more if it was fleshed out into a chapter story, so the characters would have the opportunity to actually fall in love with each other. It would take more work, but judging on how much I enjoyed this story as it is I'm sure you could write a wonderful extended plot given the time and inclination.
Weeeeooow!!!!
Please please please continue!!! Loved it!!! I knew she would jut because hey it's a story, but it was so good :) liked it a lot :)
so....what happens next....
Did she transform or will she stay moral...does her life span stay the same...did she meet her father. ..does set revenge on the mayor? I'm happy that she found love but it's not over....There needs to be one to this tale. A trilogy of sorts. Wishing you would continue because you just left us wanting more.
Absolutely loved it....
I love your fantastic imagination, and how you chose to let the hero win the heart of the maiden...Anyone woman would be very lucky to experience such intense physical pleasure and then love at the same time. I wish it would happen to me. I like this sort of non-force pleasure and deep attachment, deep love and caring....Yes, please write more...Thank you. NHU
Please continue
Please continue this sensual story. I love it!
how is this love
Everyone like it's so great. For him. One of the greatest feeling a sub has is the power to stop..the sub is just as powerful as the Dom. But none of this is here just a rapist Dragon getting his rocks off.....lame and sad
needs more!
The story was great! One of the best I've read in awhile! You must make more!! I would love to read what else could happen to her.
please
I need more please pretty please
difference
i love this story but it saddens me she did not find a way to get away from him at least once. He was so sure he could tame her but she had no way of fighting. i thought perhaps she would get hurt and he would have to not touch her or force himself on her but have to give her time to adjust or at least start to like him. i would absolutely love to see you write more. your talent is beautiful :) thank you for this story
a good read. imho the character development was a bit hurried, but over all, i really liked it...5 stars
Love this story.
I've already read it multiple times and it is an amazing story. Wish there was a chapter 2 to see what becomes of them and her finding out about her dragon side. Well-written!
wonderful story line
You made a wonderful story but i kinda wish you would continue the story plot i would gladly read every one you make thank you for the good read and pls pls consider making several more chapters to this story thank you ^_____^
PLEASE!!!!
Hello PassionSaintJohn.
The other writers who wrote to you were too kind! For God's sake, I estimate that you should be able to add at least three more installments! By the way, you are the first individual whom I have ever written to. That's how delightful your story is!
Now, divorce your spouse, render your resignation from your employment, and eat sparingly, until this tale is fully complete! I'm 68, and I wish to finish this tale before I pass, which the physicians have said is less than a year!
Don't let me down! I taught high school English for 33 years and , believe me when I say that, with work, you are truly on your way to being an excellent writer! Hang in there, and this work IS real entertaining and engrossing!
Best of luck, and don't forget my advice to you!
Sincerely,
Joe.
I don't understand what is the point of breaking a person's will. It just doesn't make sense to me. It was a well written story, but to take a strong female with fire and break her down like that was disappointing.
I wish you made Marged more resistant.
:(
This was published in 2002? Is it at least possible for more?
❤️❤️❤️
Love this story wish there was more installments,
IN DESPERATE NEED
DAMMIT MAN, I'm with Joe on this on this one. T think we all know that you are aware that our mouths are watering and our hormones are raging for " THE REST OF THE STOREY". You write so well PassionStJohn, don't let us down, Please XOXO Kim
Great story
This story was fantastic! I loved it. It is a classic! Thank you!
I will admit that I have enjoyed the occasional rapey mindbreak or mind control story, but when a story tries to justify, rationalize or marginalize rape -- even if it's only implied or a consequence of the author not being brave enough to portray the protagonist bad guy as the amoral asshole he should have been -- I'm immediately squicked out.
umm, no
It was well written, I'll give you that. And I come to this site for the rape stories, so it's not like that offends me. But, seriously, stockholm syndrome isn't love. And the rapist, who so casually refers to how the last girl he was training to sell into slavery leapt to her death to escape him, is not a romantic hero. Painting such an abusive relationship through rose-colored glasses actually killed the sexy factor for me, and I totally would have been into it, had you just been honest about what a bastard this guy is.
Err
I'll admit, it is extremely well written but I felt a bit squeamish at the casual mentions of his previous lovers and their suicides (as someone else said). There is a fine line between writing erotica about ravishment fantasies and such but I think this one went a little bit too far.
soooooooooooogooooooooood
I love the thought of love and dragons. How he tamed her and by love caused her to love him back. Hope to see more from this writer
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