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It really is shaping up to be a good story,
But the chapters are rather short. I'm not trying to be nitpicky, please take it as a compliment. I want more now, but if you keep up the pace of a chapter a day, I'm sure the "too short" comments will start to fall by the wayside :-) Keep em coming!
Jumping on the bandwagon here your first three chapters should have been combined. Your story is shaping up nicely but defiantly more material need to engage the reader.
Longer please....
I love how this story is turning out! But a word if advice from an avid reader; do not submit the next chapter unless it's at least 3 pages long. The subjuct matter doesn't really allow the story to be given in small bits and pieces. As soon as the chapter gets good; it's over. That will almost certainly lead to intrest in your story quickly declining even though it has a really great start. I agree with eveyone else; first 3 chapters should have been combined. Keep up the good work!!!!!!! And don't take forever posting the next LONGER chaper :0)
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