I always think that your stories are more like essays than anything else. The ideas are interesting, but your submissions are always very short and undeveloped first person narratives recounting something that has already happened in the past. There's never any real 'story' or action. The reader can never really care about the main character, because they never develop - they are already always fixed in what they are doing, and usually happy, so there is no tension. This particular submission might have been interesting if we could have followed the transformation of the protagonist from feminist to submissive muslim wife. Instead, everything is already a done deal by the time the 'story' begins - it's happened - it's history. Also, I think Muslims might take exception to some of the things you say - the stuff about her parents being infidels is nonsense. If they are Christians, then they are seen as members of a religion respected by Islam [people of the book]. Jews are similarly respected [or were in the prophet's time]. Furthermore, not all Muslims believe that Sharia Law should be implemented as they see it as fixed in a particular time period. Finally Samuel - your ideas are often very good, but you need to try and actually give the reader a story - try moving the starting point of the action to BEFORE the end point. In other words - start at the beginning and take the reader with you in its unfolding. I hope you find these remarks useful - I'm trying to be helpful rather than critical as I see a lot of unfair, negative, very insulting [and also anonymous, of course]feedback attached by cowards to your submissions, which isn't right.
by
Anonymous11/13/11
Fuck off with all that bullshit, you are on wrong page
by
Anonymous11/13/11
idiot.
If you're gonna write an essay, make sure you know what you're talking about. Since we're on the topic, as a Muslim I'm taught that all people are either brothers and sisters in faith or equals in humanities so she could still associate with her family. Idiot.
Also any muslim knows that Saudi Arabia is the worst example of a GOOD Muslim country as they have a history of fabricating sharia laws to work in the kingdoms favour.
Islam is perfect. Most Muslims don't follow as they should so it is Muslims who are imperfect.
by
Anonymous11/14/11
Your an idiot
First of all, don't be trying to sell that stupid bullshit of Islam onto all of us. Islam is NOT perfect and is NOT the way. I thought LIT was suppose to be a site for people to write erotic different type of genre stories. Not for some crack pipe writing why Allah is so great.. and why Islam is the way. Blagh blah blah. If you want to spread Islam, go to another website that are made for that stuff...
Idiot!
by
Anonymous11/14/11
Pathetic
Please find another hobby as your interpretation of Mulim values as portrayed in this story is woeful, and only serves to incite racial tensions. It's even an insult to moderate Muslims.
.....maybe that was your real intention.
by
Anonymous11/17/11
Stop Writing
Your stories are shallow and black centric but tempt to insult other nonBlack and Non Christian.Biased,racist and bigot fits you to a tee.
by
Anonymous04/10/12
very interesting theme
i really like ur this story..u use yahoo?
by
Anonymous10/16/13
Anal intercourse
I am not a Muslim but I do know that anal intercourse is haram.
Please give us a STORY
I always think that your stories are more like essays than anything else. The ideas are interesting, but your submissions are always very short and undeveloped first person narratives recounting something that has already happened in the past. There's never any real 'story' or action. The reader can never really care about the main character, because they never develop - they are already always fixed in what they are doing, and usually happy, so there is no tension. This particular submission might have been interesting if we could have followed the transformation of the protagonist from feminist to submissive muslim wife. Instead, everything is already a done deal by the time the 'story' begins - it's happened - it's history. Also, I think Muslims might take exception to some of the things you say - the stuff about her parents being infidels is nonsense. If they are Christians, then they are seen as members of a religion respected by Islam [people of the book]. Jews are similarly respected [or were in the prophet's time]. Furthermore, not all Muslims believe that Sharia Law should be implemented as they see it as fixed in a particular time period. Finally Samuel - your ideas are often very good, but you need to try and actually give the reader a story - try moving the starting point of the action to BEFORE the end point. In other words - start at the beginning and take the reader with you in its unfolding. I hope you find these remarks useful - I'm trying to be helpful rather than critical as I see a lot of unfair, negative, very insulting [and also anonymous, of course]feedback attached by cowards to your submissions, which isn't right.
Fuck off with all that bullshit, you are on wrong page
idiot.
If you're gonna write an essay, make sure you know what you're talking about. Since we're on the topic, as a Muslim I'm taught that all people are either brothers and sisters in faith or equals in humanities so she could still associate with her family. Idiot.
Also any muslim knows that Saudi Arabia is the worst example of a GOOD Muslim country as they have a history of fabricating sharia laws to work in the kingdoms favour.
Islam is perfect. Most Muslims don't follow as they should so it is Muslims who are imperfect.
Your an idiot
First of all, don't be trying to sell that stupid bullshit of Islam onto all of us. Islam is NOT perfect and is NOT the way. I thought LIT was suppose to be a site for people to write erotic different type of genre stories. Not for some crack pipe writing why Allah is so great.. and why Islam is the way. Blagh blah blah. If you want to spread Islam, go to another website that are made for that stuff...
Idiot!
Pathetic
Please find another hobby as your interpretation of Mulim values as portrayed in this story is woeful, and only serves to incite racial tensions. It's even an insult to moderate Muslims.
.....maybe that was your real intention.
Stop Writing
Your stories are shallow and black centric but tempt to insult other nonBlack and Non Christian.Biased,racist and bigot fits you to a tee.
very interesting theme
i really like ur this story..u use yahoo?
Anal intercourse
I am not a Muslim but I do know that anal intercourse is haram.
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