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English
oops
Just a few corrections:
fannies not fannys
brassic not borassic (although apparently it originates from rhyming slang 'borassic lint'/skint)
whinged not winged
prat not pratt
puking not pukking
cream crackered is usually knackered (really tired) rather than drunk
There are plenty of other words to use for drunk: trollied, minging, pissed or pished being common.
love the use of mingers. One of my favourite words ever.
Good effort ...
... but I assure you, we Yanks know what wheels, shafting (though it's more often non-literal, as in "fucking someone over"), a piece of meat, acne (a zit is a pimple, you can have a zit or two without having acne), films (though we don't use the word much except in talking about art films), barfing, and booze are! From your other piece, "crossing the road" is certainly the usual term: the pavement is the road surface in the U.S, tarmac or concrete or even dirt (out in the country). For a *lot* more on this subject, see separatedbyacommonlanguage.blogspot.com, a blog written by an American linguist living in the U.K.
Anyhow, your basic point is correct: everyone should write in their own variety of English, it isn't *that* hard to learn. Your American readers who complain about it are idiots and should shove it.
I'm sure you meant...
amber nectar (lager) (beer) not larger (bigger)
Fun read tho I didn't like Jenny's experience.
Like it!
Nice idea, but are you open for a few suggestions....
I didn't have any trouble understanding what you wrote, but I was born and raised in London. However, maybe you should consider a rethink on some of your definitions and translations, as I feel that they might still be confusing to some readers.
There are also few spellings that need revising, and although you use 'Ruby Murray' perhaps you should do the same with other examples of rhyming slang. You could also use phonetic spelling for some of the words.
My last point is just me being picky, but I'm not sure that you're right in saying '...in any UK town."
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