The Arrangement Ch. 01-03

ummm

interesting plot, However so many things are unclear already. For example, what time period is this story suppose to be taking place seeing as a father just sold his daughter!?? and even tried to get her go 'blow' his associate! I feel like your moving too fast already, there should have been more character development before exploding into their present obstacle.

Good but...

I like the idea of the story. It needs more depth in various areas. The back story of their fathers, the characters back stories, more detailed dialogue. Your story was way too short. The history of their fathers and themselves could have been a chapter itself. Their merger another, and so on.

The plot concept is interesting and I hope you succeed at the rest of the chapters. Good luck :)

ch. 01-03

I saw u mentioned ch. 01-03 and I was expecting to see at least 5 pages. Slow down honey, your story has promise just slow it down and add some meat to the potato.

BY PUTTING THINGS IN ORDER

that could be arranging if they were in a shambles. TK U MLJ LV NV

You need to slow down, needs more depth, more information about the history, when is this story set? you also need an editor.