this cries for a sequel. It's well written, too.
Hot as hell! The characters are well-written, the story is perfectly built, the sex is steamy hot! A sequel would be nice!
Parents dinner party with the pastor and his wife? OH you have got to continue this.
More more more
Oh wonderful, insane levels of sex pleasure, sucking & fucking each others brains out and more, plus the delivery girl. I love this, my girl her best friend and I acted out most of this, 24 hours in and the girl next door called in to see if she could join us as her boy friend was passed out drunk on booze, it was great as I was only drunk on cunt juice and fuck lust. More and More please and soon. 10/10 any time.
but the first paragraph caught my eye. Had to chuckle by the second paragraph. What an erotic frolic. There's a young lady that started a thread on Lit that would fit well into one of your characters. Well done author. Thanks. Score: 5, ML
As others have said I'm not that much into group sex but always love what you write. The leadup was very sexy and although the group sex descriptions didn't really turn me on you did great, as always.
I'm used to more plot and character development from you, which of course requires longer stories. But this was the perfect length for what you were trying to do. Marathon descriptions of sex can be counter-productive; this brought the action up to a boil and presumably most readers :)
This short is great! The opening double entendre is the perfect teaser for things to come (pun completely intentional). It starts off innocent and sucks you in like a maelstrom before you can gasp for air. I'm a little sad about how quickly it ended, but alas, most great shorts are the perfect appetizer that leave you hungry for more. A revised and expanded version of this would make for an excellent e-book, JayMal.
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