Fugitive

Good story. Definately better than most.

Lookign forward to more chapters.

Great start

Loved it! More, please.

i agree, a good start but too short and unfinished.

Basically an excellent story.

I would have rated it 5 stars if it was longer and wasn't incomplete. Instead I rated it 3***.

Hoping there will be a chapter 2

A novel story. The way it was left, I'm hoping to see where they end up even if only after another sic months have passed.

"To whom that pussy belongs?" Huh????

I find it really hard to believe all the comments about how good this story was. It is inconceivable that the wife was screwing her ex BF the entire time with the in-laws knowledge and consent and hubby had no clue. This story was chocked full of bits and pieces of over used lines from other stories. The outline could have been a good one if it had original writing.

"You keep using that word.

I do not think it means what you think it means."

A lot of stories are far-fetched

and strain the bounds of credulity; that isn't the problem with this one though. LGW had a good idea for a story, maybe it sat around for a year, then got submitted without the requisite work to make it really good.

The rest?

Where's the rest of the story?

A nice believable story

Well written and edited, with good solid characters.

Thanks for the read

Right

Very Good and more please!

liked it

Got the kids on his side - home free; but the murder plot would have saved him.

Finish the story

please ... as long as it does not end up as a Cuck/Wimp tale!!

That's it? Story has absolutely no closure. Write an ending at least.

Finish

I wonder if you will ever finish a story?

ARCHAIC DIVORCE LAWS

turns stability into runners. TK U MLJ LV NV

What is the author supposed to do; continue the tale until his death?

There are many ways to end a story, and this is one. It ends at the start of another part of his life.
This is almost the ultimate LW male running away rather than dealing directly with a problem. Sad.

Disappointing Story - 5 stars for the writing

No finish. The bad guys won this one

Sequel?

I wouldn't mind a sequel for this. Fun story though.

Liked this story.

It needs to follow through to a completion of some sort.

people, people, people

It has an ending
You all act like you want someone to do all the work for you by writing in down
You want a sequel or ending write it yourself

For the author and auhunter04

Yes indeed, I can come up with an ending. Several in fact. That is not the point. You would not eat a half cooked steak. No one drives a car with only two wheels. Half a candy bar stays on the shelf. If you publish a book with an open ending but never come out with a sequel or series then word gets out an you're never published again.

Great

I have thought of this option myself. Except, I was planning on a trip to a country without extradition.

Great Tale

The question is, What is the outcome?

Change the law

It is time to change the law that automatically gives the custody of the children to the mother. In the case of adultery, the offending spouse should lose all rights to contact with the children. Any contact should be at the will of the other spouse.

Canadian Law

Having gone through this but in reverse (she took my son away from me). In this story, the court has not made a ruling before he left. Therefore, he is not kidnapping his own children. Until he is in court and there is a court order, nothing will be done about it. And even if he had been to court there was a case of a woman from Toronto who vanished with her kids to B.C. for over ten years and nothing was done when she was found. The law is not equal by any stretch of the imagination but they still will do nothing until they give you a summons. Ignore the summons and be found in contempt of court and a bench warrant for your arrest and thirty days in jail. A far cry from kidnapping though. I gave this a ***** for originality.

Loved it

This has such a rich storyline. Too bad it was not more fully developed. Well done.

Nice - short but noice

And open ended - you could work more out of it later - Nice work -

Sweet

Short and oh so sweet. Usually less-talented writers try to pad their stories and stretch them out for 8-10 pages or several installments. In this case, a talented writer pulls the plug too soon. There is enough meat in the plot to allow for at least a Part Two (her relationship with the asshole, the cross-country chase, the kids, maybe a love interest, a final showdown, etc...). How about it, LGW?

good start

Where's the rest.

part 2

This story could use part #2.

where is part 2 ?

This is good enough to deserve a part 2
Little things like how is she supporting herself and the boyfriend.

Good start

But really needs a second chapter and more info on what happened to the wife.

Agree Part 2 Needed

But NOT to tell how cheating wife has been doing, don't care, she should only rot in hell!

But I'd like to see how he and kids make out, maybe they can leak his evidence to at least get the authorities off his back.

I FOUND YOU====I GOT YOU----THIS TIME

Not Quite but ALMOST....tk u mlj lv nv

FINISH THE DAMN STORY!

Your stories are good but only seem to be one page long? Take another day, week or month but please finish the story...we need to know of the wife's misery....what happened to "Steve" and how the family got revenge on the wayward mom!

I agree with everyone else

Where's the second part? You can't leave it here!

finish the story

A very nice story but you need to finish it

What law has been broken

A father disappearing with his kids is no crime unless there is a court order for him not to do so. No police force would waste time and resources tracking the father down. The US immigration authorities may deport him as an undocumented (the new PC term for illegal) immigrant but the RCMP wouldn't be interested.

Second time through...

Thanks for the offering.

FINISH THE DAMN STORY

You heard me. Finish the damn story. Other than NOT FINISHING, it was a very good story.

Desperately

Needs an ending. Please!

Nice story about a man with no options raising a couple good kids.

@Dubby

You are right up to a point.

Yes a parent can leave with a child BUT

The other parent can file for emergency hearing to get a court order to make the other parent return the child.

Remember, he never left any proof of anything, he just took all the money, the kids, and ran.

She could EASILY get the emergency order to return. At which point, then the police would be able to get involved.

Good start but NO ending...

You're a good author but (always a "but") too many tales left hanging.

My take

There are so many stories on Lit that are unfinished it cause one to wonder why. My guess is the authors of these unfinished stories start out with a pretty good idea about the plot and start writing. They then hit a wall because they never thought the story through to end, and are just flat out clueless about how to smoothly end the story.

Surprisingly satisfying

I usually favour BTB, vengeance and payback themes and I always seek some sort of closure at the end of the stories. However, this one here ended perfectly for me. He has the love, loyalty and custody (not in legal terms but in reality) of his children, he has the money and he has his health and abilities. He has already burnt the bi*** and is still ahead of her. The hope and possibilities in the last passage is way more satisfactory than any other endings one can easily find in LW section stories. Great work.

Yet another 'writer' on this site who can't finish stories. 1* Also needs to fin another editor.