Threads: The Island

best

Of all the stories I have read on this site, this was the best I have come across. I really liked the character Ed and I think u should really make this into a book. Congrats again for being the best.

wtf

Of all the places to find one of the greatest stories to read. You were able to cover a very wide scope of events and imagination. Please keep writing and I look forward to the next read.

Wow

That was one of the best stories on the site I've read, It made me read it all in one session. 3 in the morning and I'm dead, thanks.

WOW!!

By far, one of the best stories I have read in a long time. I can't wait for more!!

You are a great story teller

Loved the story and the plot. The characters had such great dimension. I thought some of the phrasing and slang did not seem American. Also, some of the phrasing or speech mannerisms that might be the style for one character, was a bit odd to see all the characters using; i.e. "that's us leaving..." "that's me taking off..." that's us done...". Overall I think you did a great job with story and I will definitely look for more of your work in the future.

well done, sir!

This was a dowright good read. It was sexy as hell, but beyond that I found myself engaged in the story, and caring about the characters. Truly well written; I look forward to more!

Absolutely fantastic!!

That was a truly brilliant story, keep up the good work! A great story line and definitely look forward to further 'threads'. As for the length of the story, personally I like to have a one off longer story every now and then so you shouldn't change that. I think it may be necessary to post smaller chapters if you are posting as you are writing, but if you have already written all of it, your way is certainly better. I couldn't stop reading! Thank you!

What a read . . .

First off, I've been reading stuff from this site for a good number of years, but this story is the first where I've felt I should give some feedback.
Not that any feedback I give is going to influence the course of your writing. The story is the best I've read on the site. 42 pages of outstanding work. I was truly interested in the characters themselves, not just the sex scenes (lapdance, bath/massage seduction, and Kara sneaking in at night being my favorite), which I find very few writers on the site are able to pull off.
Kudos good sir. Well done.

Great Work

I just read this story and couldn't stop. This is the best story I've read on this site. I really appreciated the story and character development. PLEASE develop a sequel. I look forward to following the story line in NY and LA and when the trio returns to the island. Thanks again for a great read.

Great Story

Excellent! Unlike many of the stories on this site, yours could easily be a published novel. Some of the sex may need to be toned down but only slightly. Hopefully you will continue with another portion if Kyle's adventures with his sisters, maybe even one focusing on Kara or Katie. Thank you for sharing with us

I need more of this writing

This story is long but what a great, beautiful tale !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! More please !!!!!!!!!

Awesome

JJ, you did it... wrote something on literotica that tops everything I've read since the site launched to the public about 9 years ago. Quite the longest one but the best & most interesting. Actual storyline beyond bro sees sis or vice versa and they finally end up getting it on loses it's savour after a hundred or so of that style. This was quite refreshening. I'll be looking for more by you here!
peace man, PJ

Chapter 2 ?

First, I'd like to say this story made me register (after years of being only a reader) to comment and vote. Please, tell me there is going to be a second chapter :)

Congratulations, what a great story.
Best regards.

Great work.

Like many of the others I'm hoping to see the story go on.

Engrossing story, well done

My only complaint is about Patricia's character doing a 180. All of a sudden she decides to cool things down with Kyle because she's a submissive pain slut at heart who wants to be spit on and choked? Ugh--I had some trouble accepting that one. It felt like you had to quickly come up with something extreme to make Kyle free to fuck his way across the country. In your latest efforts I hope you'll write in more detail about Patricia and her motivation so we can understand her character better.

@pleasureseeker5 - an answer to your comment

Thanks for the comment. I've already answered this but there's been a ton of comments since, so I'll sum it up here.
Yes, Patricia and her relationship with Kyle is going to be explored extensively in the next novel.
And if you consider Patricia on her own it might seem a 180. But it's Patricia and Kyle as a couple. As you put it "she's a submissive pain slut at heart who wants to be spit on and choked? Ugh" Okay, that's an ugly summary of a character, but if Kyle was a hardcore Dom, there's no way she would have backed out. He isn't though - he's just a regular guy who's not into her stuff. Plus he's her boss. Plus she's career driven, doesn't want to complicate her working life, hasn't had a serious relationship in the past and then she meets this guy, falls for himm is still grieving and she gets scared. Trying to assert some control in her life at that point is not a big leap for the imagination.
So she tries to distance the emotions but wants to keep the sex. See where it goes.
Then she finds she can't quite keep away from him. She still wants him, she even goes as far as the public displays of affection.
Her attempts to keep her emotions under control are failing her.
That's why it's not so much a 180 as an uncontrolled 360 pulled by a confused, grieving and smitten young woman, falling in love with a guy who isn't the best choice for her.
Make a little more sense now? :-)

Anyway, there's much more in the next novel.

JJ

jammyjimmy, thanks for your response to my comment .

I'd like to clarify what I meant when I asked about Patricia being "a submissive pain slut at heart who wants to be spit on and choked." I get that Kyle is not a dom type, my point is that Patricia's submissive and very kinky side came out of nowhere--I find it hard to accept because it is so extreme. I'm glad to hear that you will be writing more about her and am looking forward to how you address this issue when you do.

next novel...

thank you for.the wonderful read jimmy... you have an amazing gift. I could not stop reading. any idea when the next novella will arrive?

Great read . . .

I don't normally read novel length work, but you drew me in on the first page. When I reached the end I wanted more of this great story.

next one??

how long would you say it's going to be until the next one? i can't wait much longer!

great

I usually don't read novels this long but yours is the best one I've ever seen.
I couldn't wait to finish and now I can't wait for more.
keep'em coming

great story

I loved this story. It could be expanded into a novel or a screenplay for a movie. It's that good. I read it in one sitting. Took me five or six hours but it was worth it. I hope we hear from you soon.

Amazing tale you wove

Thanx for putting this story here. You had me from the first page on, and was sad to reach the end. I hope you have thoughts about continuing this tale as I believe you left it open for more. Thanx once more, great story.

Superb story

What a superb story. For the site, the sex is quite infrequent, but I must say that I absolutely loved the story for, well, the story. It is very well written, the character development is perhaps a little bit fast, but still very well described and within the realm of possibility. I actually came to the point where I read the story more for the non-sex part than for the sex scenes, although those were also very well written.
One thing is sure though: I want to read more of your stories!!

Came for the sex, stayed for the story!

I was initially attracted to the story by virtue of it's high rating - obviously, looking for sex woven into a story. But by five or ten pages in, the story had taken over and the sex became secondary, something to almost skim through in order to find out what would happen next to these characters.

You have written a story with that elusive quality of creating characters where the reader actually cares what happens to them, and wants to discover more. If you can hone this ability, you might be able to write with broad market appeal....

Thanks for the story - look forward to a sequel.

So fucking good!

I agree that the sex became secondary ... but the sex was still good! Great job! I loved the intrique and suspense. I can't wait to read more!

GREAT JOB

This should be made into a cinemax series, great story line and character building.

LEFT HANGING

Need MORE, would love to see this carry over to NY, LA and back to living on the island together.

Well written

I don't understand why you posted this for people to read for free on Literotica. I'm sure you could have found a publisher.

Awesome read

It was one of the best stores I have read so far, and am amazed that you havent published it.
But I ain't complaining!
:)
looking forward to more from you

Good grief, I hope there will be sequels.

Sequels

Fantastic characterization and a plot that amounts to more than simply "Me Tarzan. You Jane. Let's fuck." There definitely needs to be sequels to this with more Kyle, Katie, and Kara action.

Awesome!

Great story! Had me reading from one end to another in one long stride!
The plot, the persons - it was all fabulous. And the erotics was hot - steaming! Liked it alot, and I hope to see more stories from you.

sometimes all one can say is " fuck yes , and may i have another"

Amazing!

Yes the 'scenes' were hot but it was the story, the island, the characters situation that kept me glued - I could not stop reading! It was an AWESOME read...I did not want it to end where it did. I sure hope you continue this story. Absolutely Amazing!

dawwwww

around page ten i was like "where's the action?" and then by page twenty i was like "im gonna log on just to read more plot, this shit is crazy good".

i had a great time reading the whole thing. i must have come 3 times every night for a week on just this. thank you for writing it.

for your next story, MORE ED lawl. his character was hilarious.

Wasted.

If this were cleaned up & expanded this would make a good story, you should try to write a novel.

WOW WOW!

YOUR STORY GOT ME KICKED OUT OF A SEMESTER, I NEED THE NEXT STORY, I WONT GIVE YOU ADVICE OR CRITICIZE YOU (YOU HAVE IT COVERED) ANYWAY, AMAZING AND....WOW

Surprising in so many ways!

Plenty of comments about how it was too long, but if people decide not to read based on that, then it's their loss! Phenomenal story! I started off wondering when the sex would start, and eventually found myself sitting up until about 2:30 in the morning because I couldn't stop reading! Really cool idea, awesome character development, absolutely worth the read! Very much not what I'm used to in this category, but I was in no way disappointed! Can't wait for more!

What did I just read? Probably the best piece of art on this site that I've read in a very long time. However, if at all possible...maybe breaking it up into a few chapters? Seeing 42 pages is a tad daunting especially when there's so much story to it.

5/5 though, I was captured by the writing, most of the dialogue and actions felt natural and the sex was steamy. Fantastic read!

Best thing I have ever read...

More, More, More.

Wow

I was spellbound, could not stop reading until my eyes hurt. Well done, love it. Please continue the story

Great Story

This was great story. Had to read it till the end. Would like to know more about the adventures of these three siblings... and please lets have the incest.... LOL!!!!

Unbelievable!!!!!

What a great story. Probably the best I've read on Literotica! Please write more.

AWESOME STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I Loved it!!!!!!!!!Awesome writing, felt very Real. Couldn't wait to see what was gonna happen next. I'm hooked. Can't wait till the next Part!!!!!!

Wow

What an amazing Author and story, I'm not much for reading but i read this from start to finish in one go as i couldnt stop myself.. I cant wait for the next installment and i hope it will be here soon.. Once again,, congratulations on a brilliant bit of work :)

Everybody who likes this Story should also check out: (on Storiesonline.net)

'John Billionaire' by bluedragon
(Guy inherits Billions and then dates topmodels etc.)
and
'Conflicted' by Eldrige
(Guy gets involved with his Sister, her Friend and their Cheerleader-Squad)
Both are great Stories that where originally hosted here but are no longer.

Great story!

This kind of thing makes me glad I took English language classes!

So it just ends there? Nothing more after the revelation of incest between Kara and Kyle? What about Katie? How are the siblings going to deal with each other and their super secret home voyeur theater? Surely there must be more in the works concerning Patricia, Lakshmi and the trips the siblings will be making. How will life turn out after these trips? Will they get back together? Will Kyle meet hot new women and test his relationship with his incestuous and assistant harem?

One thing I was puzzled on was why did you write Kyle to not wear underwear soon after he became rich? It didn't seem realistic for someone that is high profile to go commando, AND have a tailor (Margaret) who picks out his entire wardrobe.

Other comments:
- Your character Ed reminds me of Jonah Hill in Superbad.
- Given that this was a fairly recent story, I'm glad to recognize a lot of stuff from pop culture.
- 42 pages was a long read for me. I had to read 3-5 pages at a time. I actually read about 90% of it and skimmed the rest. It was the longest single story I've read here, and it was captivating in the beginning, but I really think with this large cast of characters, you could have introduced more subplots, etc. during the current story, and write some plot twists into it as well. I really hope there is more to come.

I also think that while the flirting between Patricia and Kyle was good, it could have been teased and drawn out a bit more by having those classic interruptions and making it all the more taboo. I found it a bit unrealistic that everyone who knew kind of just accepted the fact that Kyle was doing his hot assistant, and there weren't really any ramifications to their actions.

At any rate, it was a good long read for me. Thank you.

A matter of curiosity.

I concur with those who have complimented you on a great story.

The objects of my curiosity are two fold:

1) why did you feel a need to write cunt as c*nt and fuck as f*ck, as you did in one of your replies, and

2) why have the incorrect words not been replaced with the correct ones?