All Comments on 'Cream and Lace Ch. 01'

This was entirely too short to gain my interest for another chapter. I really get turned off with these short entries that are intended to be teasers for more chapters. Usually I forget about the author and story so that additional chapters are missed or ignored.

Nice try but forget about my looking for more.

Hey, Keep these chapters coming. I appreciate a "quickie" even in story telling. Yes, the two of them will enjoy. You have much to look forward to in your writing. Oh, also, fill out your bio more even with a picture. I like to know something about the author, too.

Joe

You have lost me as a future reader of any stories you put on here. Too bad!

I don't mind short chapters, but holy hell, one second she's reaching for her diary and the next second his tongue is up inside her? Seriously?

I agreed with the others responses that it was much too short because i liked what you did write. You got me strokin dear looking for more of your submissions thank you

Kam

That was a good start, keep it going. and please add your pic to your bio.

Please disregard anything that is negative from Mr. phony anonymous. He she or it doesn't have the balls to sign their name so just disregard their comments like the rest of us do.

It was alright. Next time give the characters more depth don't jump into the sexual stuff so fast ;) other then being short it's was good. Keep writing

A little short but well written. I would love to see a little more lead in before they actually get down to it. Keep it up!

I would have liked to have read more about the brother and sister. Perhaps a little more lead in to their tryst, and a lot more of them after they broke that taboo line of brother and sister sex.

I hope that they eventually fuck and the author writes about how they become exclusive to each other as lovers.

Thanks for the feedback, and right now I'm getting chapter two ready for submission. Trust me, I'll be adding more character depth as the story progresses, since the whole point of this was a character intro exercise on my part. Usually people complain I give too much away too soon, so I'll be trying to slowly let people get to know my characters, their interests, hobbies,, views on life and related topics as well as how they screw! That's another thing. Excuse my foul language. Obviously, I'm not a guy, but I grew up with mostly jocky friends and their potty mouths! They had the WORST gutter speak of all the people I knew.

Thanks,

Kitty

I'm glad to see you are writing more chapters, but why the delay? I hope to read more soon.

the writer sounds like a grade school dropout and an underage virgin also. delete and rewrite this trash before posting another chapter or just delete and stop writing.

Way too short.