All Comments on 'A Paradox of Averageness'

add more levels and reach an about or almost so. TK U MLJ LV NV

enjoyable.... good to see your writing again

I said it before and I'll say it again. You're the only author on this site who actually makes the effort to learn from your experience in writing, thus making each and every story better than the last. You put thought into your stories and a lot of effort. I for one would like to thank you for that effort. It was not wasted.

Very much looking forward to reading more from you in the future.

Oh, and Tazz317? PLEASE! Just shut the fuck up!!!!!

I strongly agree that tazz317 should shut the fuck up!

a sexy wife that doesn't think so, and a horndog husband with eyes for his wife...hummm sounds like a loving couple to me......great story....5*'s

Does anyone understand what tazz says anyway? Most of what he comments seems like my 2 year old g-daughter banging on the keyboard... with the caps lock on!

This was, without doubt, the truest story I have ever read here, and possibly in my life. Brilliant!

It was as if Slirpuff has invaded my world and my head. My wife saves me hundreds of dollars every time she shops. She can spend an hour in the dollar store! The home goods stores are like water torture. The main character in this story feels as all married men should feel; that their wife is hot and desirable and other men will want her but will never have her because she is already taken. This feeling should never go away. Nice story

its typical mindless consumerism- and govt like thinking. Spending $100 even IF the item costs $200 ..is STILL spending $100.

Spending NOT as Much is STILL spending ...

increasing govt spending for say education by 3% insteasd of the proposed 5% ...is still increasing spending.

Good short story with a bit of humor. 5 out of 5.

The rest of us aren't. If spending money actually saved money, I could buy Virginia and make you king.

Been there, done that, got the "T" shirt but I didn't really think much about it until I read this. As always, thanks for sharing.

This is a Loving Husband story, and I like it!

Fun to read......and most of us men have been there and done that, and decided that our wives are indeed keepers!

As others have said, this story hits a home run. The mall; I enjoy going to the mall. Not for the shopping but for the people watching, and yes the eye candy. She shops, and I enjoy the sights. The author hit the nail on the head; for me my Mrs. IS the hottest married woman around! Fantasy stays where it belongs, and breathes hot desire into our reality. Nice to see a TLC here instead of the typical TTB's, and wimps stories. Refreshing. This category needs more TLW's. Now that is a paradox!

Thank you!!

Mashed potatoes. Plain mashed potatoes. Imagine supper time and the wife hands you your supper and on the plate was nothing but mashed potatoes. How would you feel about the meal?

You've written some excellent stories in the past, this one must have been a fluke.

No cheating wives, wimps or cuckolds were killed in the writing of this story....

Always like your stories. This one is a little Gem

THAT I GIVE A 5 STAR BECAUSE THE LIMIT IS SET BUT MY AGREEMENT WITH THIS THIS FRESH AIR IS SO INVIGORATING THAT WORDS ESCAPE ME.HOW DO I TELL THE MAIN SQUEEZE THE BATTLE AX WAR DEPARTMENT AND HOW MANY OTHER TERMS OF ENDEARMENT YOU REALLY DO LOVE HER ONLY AND YES I TELL HER THAT EVERY DAY FOR 4X YEARS. GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

now that would be telling ... wouldnt it?

I thought I was one of the few who viewed married life this way! Wonderful read!!

Well written, fun story. And one that lots of guys can identify with.

Nice to see a loving couple and a spouse who appreciates the other.Also nice to see a realistic woman,women are very self critical and the wife feeling uncomfortable w tight clothing at her age is very true. The stories on here with the 40 or50 year old woman telling herself she is a hot fox and so forth is male fantasy for the most part,even the most attractive woman tends to see 'flaws' rather then the good..

I also like the real description of sex st that age ,with a normal sex drive given jobs and family and driving kids around the hypersexual wife looking to have sex all the time is a fantasy,physically and emotionally.

You must have followed me to the mall two days after christmas. I feel like an old previous walking around the mall. I'd rather have my add plucked bald by a sadistic pygmie with a bad attitude and a hang over than go to the mall. Loved the story!

I loved the premise and the telling, no argument with 5 stars except that it belongs in HUMOR. (or maybe SciFi if he thinks he can get away with his rating habit!)

Done that!!!!!!! Thanks for sharing.

Great story and a breath of fresh air. The only issue I had was grading only the women in their late twenties or over, which on most days would eliminate about 75 percent of the females in the mall. Okay, I'm a perv, so shoot me.

this was the most boring crap I've read in a long time. I guess we all know how to avoid going shopping with your wife.

I was going to say that men could get even by taking their wives to the home improvement store, but that does not work either. The last time I tried that she bought expensive patio furniture while I was looking for a ten dollar tool. :) I only looked away for a minute...

I kept skimming ahead to see where this was going and SMACK - I came to the end.

This was a rare gem of a story that shows what a married couple is like. You could have been writing about any couple and while it may have been boring to some, I loved it. Thanks for writing a wonderful story

I have to admit that I shared a tiny little bit of the disappointment of some readers with what is really a very good short story. It's funny and it's so damned true to life it shouldn't be allowed on this site. Every Loving Wife story has to have big tits, big dicks, seducers and the seduced, pathos, pain and passion. But, it was so damned good. Just don't do it again. By which I mean, I have to admit the stories of yours that I like the most are the ones that spread the pain. You do a very good heartbreak and angst and male rage. And you haven't done one of those in too long. You're good at funny, but you're better at sad!

dqs

For no cheating wives,cuckolds or wimps. This category has had an unusual run of these type stories lately (especially cuckolds and wimps) Yours is is a breath of fresh air and hits close to home. Gotta love that mall. More like this

... except for the fact that I like to shop.

I agree that the passion of your love is what you make of it. Isn't that an amazing thing?

Short and to the point. Not many writing errors. Category is probably wrong but I overlooked it this time because this was funny and rang true for so many married guys. Thanks for writing.

Short and to the point. So true to many men. The wife is the apple of our eye, as we see them as they were when we married them, only better. They love us in spite of our faults, as we do them.

Thanks

I love fiction and I'm a hopeless addict for it. I love stories that are filled with action and drama. I also gravitate toward stories that are a touch dark and ones that are filled with raw emotion since in these stories a writer has to stretch their legs and work a bit to make the reader "feel it." The above being said, it occasionally hits me that there is a wonderful place for a reality story. One where there does not have to be any great conflict, no hair breadth escape from a bloodcurdling adventure, no betrayal by a lover, only a glimpse into the life of an ordinary family in love with one another.

This story works for the simple reason that we can all see ourselves in it. After 25 years of marriage, She Who Must Be Obeyed and I could have easily been the couple in this story. It was all there, including the fact that my dear wife is a proponent of the "shop 'til ya drop" school. It was also touching to see that I am not alone in realizing that I love my wife dearly and not another woman on this planet could take her place for a second. How many of us husbands really stop and wonder how the hell we managed to get these wonderful creatures to love us?

This story not only was refreshing, with a storyline that made us more appreciative of the institution of marriage and family values, it was extremely well written from a mechanical standpoint. The feel good aspect of the story was heightened by the humor in it as well. This was truly a loving wives story and I was proud to give it five stars. Way to go Slirpuff!

This is a fantasy I actually have a shot at creating.

And so true!

Thank you for sharing this story with us.

Thank You!

Over and over and over again.....seems like a life sentence, without parole!

and a

first Grade Primer for understanding what sex is all about.

without hours of suffering getting into and out of the lot. Actually I enjoy malls with all their weird foods, strange stores, book and record stores. The funny thing is that my wife takes so long to make up her mind that the bill does not run up, like it does when I do the shopping!

Lots of fun. How come all our wives are above average?

A gem of a story that is so true to life, just about every guy can identify with it. Have patience guys, when she who must be obeyed gets a bit older, the lure of the mall does diminish.

From a happy man -

Nice change - from some of the writers ideas of happy -

Thanks -

I honestly don't know how to rate it so I don't.

Dear Slirpuff,

I suppose it is inevitable that we all become more philosophical as our years advance; your story reflects this very well.

R A Oliver

That is how all married people should look at there spouses. In my eyes she is a 10 perfect for me.

Thanks for the entertainment.

Mike from Texas

and make sure the cook is aware of this. TK U MLJ LV NV

YOU BEEN BANGING ONE OUT ALL FUCKING DAY>

FFS.

A sweet and loving marriage. A perfect life.

Must be in an alternative universe.

Makes me wish my life went differently.

Oh well. Next life.

I read your story with a grin on my face the whole time. And I read it out loud to my wife who laughed at several points while I was reading. She asked me if I had started submitting stories to the website as she and I agreed that the man in the story was me!! I do those things described, especially the tight and revealing clothes for my wife. She at least indulges me by wearing them. Great story and author brought a smile to my and my wife's faces. Thanks

What a fantastic story, well I take that back it is how it really is most modern places in the world, not enough sex but a dam good read, as someone else said I smiled all the way through this...

Thank you for this

Love this story. romantic w/o the embellishments.

Great story, good read and so true. Had to chuckle in relation to the shopping comments!

I say almost perfect for no other reason than perfection whilst striven for should not be achieved, after all we are only human, IMHO.

There was a song Frank Sinatra would often sing in concert. He introduced it as truly a great love song that never once mentioned the word in its title or lyrics. Like the song your story (I think you actually did use the words....although unnecessarily), loving homage was paid to a woman. In the story her identity is known, in the song, she's unknown; but the effect essentially is lovingly the same. The song written by George Harrison is "Something". You've written, I think, one of the few stories that would more properly fit into a "Loving Husbands" category. You handled it beautifully. A total "5"!

... Because it is a 5 star story. Panther Fan.

a good one. Why oh why can't there be more like this. My hats off to you Slirpuff, great story!

Nice to have a bit of sanity here instead of the usual nightmare material!

Tell her/them ,"I'll take these out to the car, while you carry on shopping". Good for another half hour away from them.

Between a man`s credit card, and a woman`s credit card?

A man`s credit card has a LIMIT.

A woman`s credit card has a TARGET !

All so true...and well told. It is torture when the clowns running the store don't put the husband chairs out....remember vibrate in the on position is always useful.

Thanks

And very-well written.

So explitive inserted here true five of a husbands feared words lets goto the mall. Very well written.

when they get home its another story. TK U MLJ LV NV

Thanks!

a fun read. Five stars.

This was nice reading and also entertaining with a bit of honesty and humor 5 stars all the way.

Gotta love it. Thanks, Slirpuff.

I can't go shopping at the Mall. I have other things to do. There are ALWAYS things that need to be done a the house. Every wife I've ever known has a "honey do" list that she's continually adding to. All husbands have one. He simply tells her he's going to work on maintaining their house or he's going to work on her list. Whether or not they actually get done is immaterial. You never let your wife drag you to the mall. That's just stupid.

Great tale whereas the spouses didn't cheat on each other. Always a winner.

actually rate themselves a point higher on a scale, 5 is average and most people give themselves 6 or 7's. Most pretty girls you see are actually not that pretty but for the makeup they are wearing which can make a plain looking girl become a model

This is what I call a "Non-Story". A waste of my time. How the Hell do I get back

the few minutes I wasted reading it? Damn shame, too, Slirpuff, your stories

are usually pretty good.

A total wind-up to get to the 122 people line - amazing just how many didn't catch on!

A brilliant long winded spoof!

19PVC44

It should be in non-erotic or something.

Every man can identify with this story ...

this is exactly how a husband can dig a hole for himself; soon she may start fantasizing and yes cheat on him.

I was anciously waiting for the cheating bitch to walk out of a store kissing some young hunk. Then he could BTB. Instead she walked out all pretty straight to him, looking all hot.

Still, a nice story.

because she's not a cheating tramp and loves her husband....it's in the wrong category!

Waste of space publishing this nothing story.

i liked it sort of a bit too realistic, i like a bit more drama but a did enjoy reading so yeah

Not sure what the point of this mundane story was, but putting it in the LW category was just wrong. Romance? Maybe. LW? Not even close. 1☆

or how to adjust in all situations, TK U MLJ LV NV

Well not precisely but close enough to form a memory.

Loved it but it belongs more in Romance than in LW.

Thanks for a wonderful read.

Humor probably the best fit, but definitely not a ha, ha story.

Boring

Good story about loving wife and the husband who adores her. Who hasn't girl watched at the mall.

in his eyes and heart she is still the 10 he fell in love with and married, TK U MLJ LV NV

And then .... nothing happened.

I enjoyed it and chuckled a number of times.

But it did not go as I thought it would. I thought you would point out that in many lw stories, one is criticized as being average. The thing is that just almost everyone is average. That is the truth we see in bell graphs. So, the point should be except in porn, do not be ashamed of being average, it just means you are normal, like most of us.

NOT an LW story. Non-Erotic or How-To

I have to laugh at Anonymous who said "Nothing happened." Everything happened that is important. I like reading a story about a couple that understands what love is.

Decent writing but

Can't anon critics read? You titled it paradox. What were they expecting, A+ averageness. It was a great example of Mr Average with his wife at the mall. I thought it was a great average guy story.

And totally agree with Tazz. Slir you are definitely married and have been for a long time, good for you and the missus. Sure wish I had read this with the brains to understand it when I was young. Signed: BTW

You wrote this about ALL of us men over 40!!! Great non-cheating story. A breath of fresh air

Yep, I like it because it paints a picture of all of us.

It is as real as it gets.

At the mall (or any store for that matter), the husband has one role: Pack Mule. I have no problem telling my wife and even adding appropriate sound effects. One benefit to being tall is I can look over all the clothing racks and spot my wife weaving around and plot an appropriate course to intercept her when she emerges.

Nice story.

Great REAL story!!!