by Tzara
Liked the poem. Accidentally swiped my pinky over the "1" star rating. Disregard!
(Damn iPads are too touchy.)
Most enjoyable too - a great read. Sweet O.
But came back in the afternoon to say thank you.
Enjoyed this on the forum, too. Glad to see that others will get a chance to read it.
clear visuals, easily reaches out emotionally. my only issue is with that last line - 'yet will I still write' feels a little awkward to me, like a question but lacking the implied question mark ... not even coming across as a rhetorical question to me. sorry if i'm not getting it, T. it'd read smoother as a declaration (if not intended as a question) as 'yet still I'll write your name in that (extra syllable) sand.'