by fantasyboy
Not really sure what the other person is talking about not pathetic or bad.
Good story. I urge you to think about writing a new chapter, just about that subject, the domination / submission relationship with Laura's father and Claire. Keep on doing your best.Perhaps the psychological part of Laura's thoughts, her mental struggle between what she wants and what is right isn't long enough, but still a very good subject to write on.
Ignore that earlier comment this was a good plot. Only problem is it was a bit short. Now that the Laura is now completely the good girl gone bad, there isn't any thrill to her anymore. It would be better to make a new set of characters.
If there is ever a sequel, I hope the story gets better.
Spice the sequqel up a little bit with some pissing on the part of all three of them. Perhaps Claire needs to slip on a garter belt and some full fashioned dark stockings and stand over Laura and piss all over her.
Just ideas.