Sex, Cheating and Romance Ch. 05

NOW THE REALITY IS OVER

time for new lifes. TK U MLJ LV NV

You On A Roll!!!!

Good read sorry it's almost over. Thanks for sharing.

Great

I was right and I was wrong. I figured Randy and Olivia would get together but I also thought that Randy wasn't the biological father. I'm glad I was wrong about that.
Now all we need ia a proper ending.

Very Good as Always

Have to admit that I did not think that Randy was a blood relative of Victoria and that the death of Sheila surprised me. The rest was right where I expected it. I would like to register my agreement with those who commented that the death
Sheila removed a lot of opportunities for tension and character development. Will there be any surprises for the last chapter?
Certainly I like it...

As always....a recognizable 4 star DGH story

I have two small comments: the first...although the development of the story was fine, tension was missing. Perhaps the developments were too predictable As a story, its arc missed a high point. Its dramatic points were rather limited.

The second is more pointed: What's with Red Lobster? The 3 RLs I've been in (East Coast, focused around NJ) were noisy, which I can put up with if the food were excellent, but more important, the food was at best mediocre. As a place for a story setting, RL does not cut it when so many good and excellent restaurants exist. Maybe someone can explain RL's charm in storytelling?

Regards,
Bill (in NJ)

The writing was good

but the story lacked intrigue & emotion. Where's the part about Olivia being the one who killed her sister? Well, I'm sure you'll get to it.

liked the story so far

I hope Olivia who seems so perfect had nothing to do with the murder of the two low lifes in this story. that would kill there love for each other and kill this stories happy ending..

5 stars.

Excellent story.

Nice

Never thought I would get all teary-eyed reading a story on Literotica, but you succeeded! Well done!!!

NeuroBill, It Would Exceed My Remit

as copy editor to do a restaurant review in the middle of a DG Hear, MFG, story, so no comment on Red Lobster. I must assume that Randy Burke is unaccustomed to fine dining, and that his budget doesn't extend to the high-priced places.

5 Stars

Well told!!

One of the Best

Yes, you are one of the best authors, but this is not your best work. I agree with the perceptive comments by NeuroBill and in addition find the dialogue to be stiff and not natural, especially between Randy and Olivia. You display a couple of persistent errors in grammar, but one does not know whether that's from an attempt at a "natural, down-to-earth voice or is truly an error. I look forward to your next story.

I am never a big fan of stories where the cheating spouse suddenly dies. It's just hard to engage after that happens. I suspect Olivia was the trucks driver that night. Thanks for the offering.