I hope this plan works. If not, they are in huge trouble. Great Update!!!
But you need to slow down and develop the story and the characters. But great idea for a story and I enjoyed reading it so far
Leilani is a piece of work! The story was kinda hard to follow & there were some parts that I had to read a couple of times to make sure that I understood the action occuring.
All & all great update!
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